Pearls & Jules of Wisdom

Ten Things Wednesday

2012-01-11T09:12:00.000-08:00

1. Son#2 is doing well lately. He hasn't had anymore incidents, knock on wood. And I've come to the conclusion that his bruises were more likely from a teeter totter or such thing that he probably did to himself. I think the negligence probably came from the newbie staff member not keeping an eye on him or reporting the accident that occurred. The investigation is still on-going, but I'm already assuming, most likely we will never know.what truly happened.

2. I'm thankful to feel 100% physically better now. You can handle things so much better mentally when you physically feel better & I'm sure not taking that for granted. Test results back, and I don't have rheumatoid arthritis or Lupus. I have some strange thyriditis. Hashimotos? Whatever it is, there's a medicine for all the spasms so I'm feeling quite good most days. I'll take it! So many people have much worse going on daily and I have bigger fish to fry. Onward & upward!

3. I am thankful that my weekly Bible study started back up last night & it was quite an interesting discussion about the book of Daniel, angels & the whole realm of heavenlies fighting around us, FOR us. I'm looking forward to the day I can read the book "This Present Darkness" to my boys out loud. I think I'm going to re-read it for myself now. That book was life changing in the way I looked at our lives here on earth & my spiritual connection to God. Thank you Luke Pyron for loaning me the book & introducing it to me many moons ago.

4. I am quite thankful to finally have talked to Dr. M. Son#2's doctor at Camelot. Although I have never met her in person, I can now say I've spoken to her. I do feel she is competent, however I did get the impression she's someone that isn't always listening to us "parental experts". (How could we not be? We lived with our kids 24/7 YEARS longer than they've known them!) But for now, she's listening enough. Last night they called to tell me she FINALLY got to look in his ears and one has some pink tinged drainage. So they wanted permission to start him on anti-biotic.
I'm glad they stopped thinking he was nicking his ear with a fingernail & listened to the Mama Bear that there was something really going on.

5. God keeps whispering to me that fear is from Satan. And if Satan tries to shake you with something new & it doesn't work, he'll go back to what he KNOWS works on you.
I wear two bracelets as reminders, every time I put on my watch. One says "EXPECT MIRACLES". And the other is Jeremiah 29:11
"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD "plans to prosper you, not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

6. I have a cousin getting some help in a facility in Missouri for addiction & such issues. I'm SO pleased & very thankful for him to be accepting help & look forward to seeing his gentle, heart more present in his family's life.

7. We get to go do a therapy with son#2 this Saturday afternoon. It's because Lolly wants us to see son#2 working & behaving with Toya. It'll be a long afternoon/evening, but I'm looking forward to it. We've worked up to a 4 hour long pass now so we get to take him to eat dinner & we're going to try bowling. Wish us luck--first time to attempt that with the kiddos!

8. Ying & Yang. Sometimes I'm Ying & other days I'm Yang. What I appreciate without waver is that whatever kind of day I'm having, either Ying or Yang---my husband is having the other. As infuriating as our differences are to me at times, I do realize it's a "good thing" as Martha Stewart says. When I was so down about son#2---he picked me up. He was rational & all kinds of annoying logical male , while my heart was ruling my thoughts, he was able to be the strong one. I think it's kind of cool the way that works out.

9. Thank you God for entertainment like books, TV & movies/Netflix, games & puzzles. Without it, I'm not sure I would have been able to relax through the holidays as much as I was. It was a nice way to escape reality for a bit and try to take my mind off anything & everything.

10. And last but by far the very most important ---the thing I'm most thankful for, is all of my friends & family. Every single one from acquaintances, cyber buddies and lifers------THANK YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. I would NEVER have made it through the holidays & the toughest times recently without all those prayers & kind thoughts from all of you. It's been a very touching thing when I get down in the dumps, to realize how many people have sent cards, emails, notes & in-person told me how much they care, wish us the best, spend their own time in prayer & just genuine love I've felt. I can't even begin to describe the kindness. I probably don't deserve it but I will take it as the gift from God it is and pray it continues!

Good-Bye and Good Riddance 2011!

2012-01-04T13:22:00.000-08:00

What a turbulent month December was! The usual busy of Christmas was afoot as well as three trips to OKC to see our boy.
In those four weeks we had three "holds" and TWO self-inflicted goose eggs on the middle of his forehead. One golf ball sized, the other (done to himself this Monday) tennis ball sized. It was shocking to see the golf ball one on Christmas Eve & scratches he had on his face from another child there in his unit. But apparently when we left something happened. Weekend help is not as up on the procedures or follow-thru. But weekend HOLIDAY help....I think is much less trustworthy.

When we came to visit this past Friday (30th) we were taken to a new administrator office to meet with the director and Lolly. Apparently the bruises on the tops of son#2's thighs were WAY worse than they mentioned in a phone call.
And they were unexplained. Nothing had been reported that weekend of Christmas. So the bruises were most likely inflicted either by son#2 or a roommate/staff. They just failed to report it so they were not discovered until Monday. The bruises were in an area that is difficult to conclude how it could have been accidental. It's almost as if he was was standing up and someone hit him across the front of the thighs with a 4x6 board.

There is an investigation going on right now & it was reported to a state agency that records these things. They are doing an in-house investigation & are interviewing all involved as well as having written up the workers that weekend for not reporting the incident.

Reality set in late Friday night (30th) and I was barely able to sleep. The reality is, as a mother my worst nightmare could possibly have happened. That we sent him there for help, and someone hurt him & he can't tell us. It breaks your heart.
It's taken this long for me to be able to discuss it whether in writing, out loud or mentally processing it, without crying.
It's rough to think because son#2 can't speak, we may never know what exactly happened. Or if it's a possibility to happen again. We trust the staff that is there 99% of the time. But sadly, I'm still hoping for some blood disorder or such thing. Which we're still looking into.

We're in the middle of discussing if his meds are interacting with one another & causing some extra aggression. It cannot be good for him to have several goose eggs in the same place, aka trauma to his forehead, in the matter of 6 months time.
It just can't. They do neuro checks afterwards, but still. I'm beginning to think we need to buy him an NFL quarterback helmet.

During all this I've struggled physically as well. With an infection that's just now over. And now a bad reaction to the latest antibiotics I'm taking. So needless to say I don't feel a hundred percent mentally or physically to deal with all of this.
I keep reminding myself, trust that God has a plan. While I do not doubt this for one minute, it's difficult to keep one's spirits up when you close your eyes & face the thoughts of the what-if's.
I'm slowly digging out of all this, but it's very overwhelming.
I still don't want to talk about it--too fresh. But thanks so much to you ALL for the thoughts, prayers & well wishes. We appreciate them all. A friend of mine keeps praying for a "hedge of protection" around son#2. I love that. That's all I want. Thank you to our friends and we appreciate the patience & perseverance you've had enduring this with us. He *is* making some good progress so I hope & pray 2012 is much better to our son.

Good News & Bad

2011-12-07T12:27:00.000-08:00

I realize it's been around Thanksgiving since the last update. 'Tis the season & all that jazz. Add in doctor & dentist appointments, holiday parties starting & regular things like church...well, not much time to sit down, much less blog.

Our time with son#2 the day before Thanksgiving was just wonderful. I couldn't have asked for anything other than another t-shirt. (He was wearing the same one he wore the last time we visited.) And he *did* have a new owie on his forehead.

He has made some progress with which we are so pleased with. We are stunned to see him work in therapy with a puzzle. Lolly asks him for each animal & varies it up in no particular order & son#2 can hand the piece to her. This may sound small but I assure you it isn't!
He can also put them back in the correct place as she calls them out.

The brothers truly enjoyed their time together.
Son#2 is also topped out on his ADHD meds. This is more good news because he is doing well on them. The school teacher he has emailed me that he can focus for much longer periods of time now & get things accomplished that are asked of him.
Even Lolly can get him to sit through a one-on-one therapy session for 20 minutes before he tries to get up.
However, this means he is currently taking/on four meds counting Zyrtek. And they seem in no hurry to remove that one for some reason either.

Lolly called last Wednesday for our weekly phone therapy session and told me the staff is reporting some crying spells son#2 is having. They are finding nothing to be the cause so they believe him to be missing us & depressed. THAT is heartbreaking. My stomach & heart both sank. They want to put him on an anti-depressant. I was immeditely skeptical. All I've read & seen in the news about these type of drugs in kids, seems to lead to bad end results. Like suicide attempts.
I had to give verbal consent but Lolly assured me that was a different branch of anti-depressants & the one they would use would be mild and he would be observed 24 hrs a day.
Maybe that bring more comfort if I knew they were totally responsible & trustworthy with things...like say, clothing.
Double edge sword---I don't want my baby crying & sad. To think he's having (hormones too) feelings of confusion, loneliness or sadness & can't express them almost breaks me. Some people try to tell me he wouldn't know he's away from us. He does. Believe me when I say some of his thought processes are behind in development but he DOES miss his family.
It *is* a sad thing being away from family & with strangers. It's not the warmest environment. But to trust there won't be a bad reaction like I've seen from him with meds in the past....there's the rub.
It boils down to trust. In God above all & that Camelot will indeed keep an eye on him. He's already trying to run his head into things. And they've kept that from going further, so I guess it's worth trying. The poor baby's been in a "hold" several times in the past few weeks. One time lasted 19 minutes. That just kills me to think of him on the floor, with people on top of him holding his down on his stomach until he calms down.
So I said yes to the anti-depressant. We'll see. Lolly calls tomorrow for an update. Been a rough week. I've barely gotten to talk to him on the phone. They either aren't answering the several times I call or he won't "talk" back to me.

And the bad of the bad news is, son#2 won't be able to be home for Christmas. I can't talk much more about that. I'm trying to keep busy so I don't have to think about it. Sure he doesn't know what day it is, but he'll see a lot of other kids leaving with their families on a pass. We just haven't worked up to that amount of time yet.

So:
Good---progress with ADHD med and it's working & learning his puzzles.
Bad---needs fifth drug, an anti-depressant & can't come home for Christmas.
So hug those kiddos--grown & small tight this Christmas. I'd never have thought a year ago that my nest would be minus one this holiday season.

Ten Things Thursday--Gobble, Gobble!!

2011-11-24T07:39:00.001-08:00

Ten Things Thursday

1. I am so very thankful I got to spend yesterday with ALL of my family.

2. We always have weather on Thanksgiving that doesn't require scarves & snow boots. (Usually it's shorts.) As much as I adore winter weather, it's much easier to transport food, when you're not worried about killing yourself on the sidewalk.

3. This is the first Thanksgiving since we had only TWO chitlins and they were in highchairs, that Hubbo and I can sit down--SIT DOWN--to eat. We won't have to rush. Hubbo won't have to stand outside and feed son#2 standing up or share his food with him. And I don't have to rush around refilling son#3's plates. I might even talk to people. I am seriously thankful for this.

4. I am a very thankful that my children all have tender hearts & care about other people's feelings. Most of the time.

5. What good food my family can fix!! You have no idea how good my Grandma Bible's dressing is. And everyone has something that's their thing. I'm thankful that we all get to eat as much as we want today where I know in some places, some people don't get that luxury. I better eat extra today.

6. What cool people have taught my children over the years! We ran into Ms. Ann, the paraprofessional from son#1's elementary school days. She was so excited to see us and catch up with our family. I know there's no way every teacher can be as close to each student but I appreciate & am thankful those that have worked with our family, are.

7. I'm thankful we got to ride in more comfortable space to OKC yesterday & to Pryor today. Thanks to a friend who GAVE us a put-put car. It's a very well kept church lady car. I'll take it! No car payments--another thanksgiving! Saving moo-la right now is important while son#2 is away. I am sort of waiting for the other shoe to drop with the cost of Camelot. We all know castles ain't cheap!!

8. Sounds silly but I'm so happy the major stores decided to start Black Friday shopping at 10pm-Midnight. I'd rather just stay awake then get up at 4am.

9. I'm thankful for toys. Let's be honest. It makes traveling easier or keeping them out of my hair while I bake. Yay toys!!

10. While son#2 is away, the brothers are getting to have their own rooms/space. With them being 13-1/2 yrs old and 5-1/2 yrs old--I am GRATEFUL they are out from under each other. I've convinced myself they argue less now.

New Things, Good Things

2011-11-17T17:14:00.000-08:00

New Things,Good Things

Lolly called today since we won't be there in person this week for therapy.
Her updates on son#2 were encouraging and she had some funny stuff to tell me.

Seems son#2 is getting good at putting his shoes on by himself & keeping them on for longer periods of time. (20 mins) Those who know us, know this was a big, big deal. And we're on the third pair of shoes since he's been down there. These are velcro and easier for him to figure out.

When trying to work with son#2, LaToya had been letting him slap her hand as in "Give me five!". But after a bit she started yanking her hand back so he'd miss, and son#2 thought this was hilarious. Then he figured he'd use his other hand to hold her hand still so he could hit it. After she started moving her whole arm back & after he had a giggle fit, son#2 used his other hand to hold her whole arm still so he could slap her hand. GREAT problem solving skills!! Now if we could just channel that into motivation to learn other things...like potty training.

We did get the "mood med" moved down from 8pm to 5pm. That's still progress I guess.
They are finding it easier to give him all the meds together---ADHD, the "mood med" and the Zyrtek. They mostly all have to be in food so I suppose I understand.
I suggested putting it in his afternoon snack but those are usually 100 calorie packs of crackers, chips or cookies so they can't mix the liquid/powder meds in.

Son#2 has had a few scratching aggression issues this week but no episodes requiring holds. WHEW! That makes Mama Bird happy.
He also hitting a good stage with the toileting process. Son#2 doesn't want any Pull-Ups on that are wet or anything else. He takes them off immediately. Which at least it's a closed campus & not in public, right?
It's the small things.

I had concerns that son#2 might get bored over the weekends, but they went to see the Smurf movie last weekend and this Sunday they have an outing so there can be a deep clean on his unit. I also inquired about getting son#2's cottage a therapy ball or two ($12 a piece) or a mini-trampoline ($35). Lolly said they could have the balls & may wait until it's too cold to do their Fit Walks outside. At least with the ball I could put his name on one in big letters so they couldn't loos that right?
She did mention they might pop them but I know how much son#2 loved his ball at home, so I'd love to see him have something he enjoys to occupy him on weekends especially. Lolly has to see about permission for the trampoline. Here's hoping!!
It sounds like to me that the past parents haven't been very involved and Camelot isn't used to having donations or people who help too much.
I'm looking forward to shaking things up a bit & puttin' some sunshine up in there! WHO'S WITH ME??!?!?!

Frustration

2011-11-15T06:32:00.000-08:00

It's been an interesting, sort of stressful few weeks since I last blogged. I truly hesitate to use the word stressful, because on the scale of stress we've experienced, it's not really anywhere near the end of unbearable. So it's difficult for me to come up with the right answer when people ask how things are.
DO NOT GET ME WRONG, I appreciate so much people asking how son#2 is, but it's not a black & white answer. And we all know how much we love to hear "Fine", and go on.
So please be patient with me, if I stutter, stammer or look like a deer in the headlights when you ask for an update.

** Nov. 2 we started a new med--an ADHD med. It appears to have NOT given a bad reaction yet so we're very hopeful. Usually we see a bad reaction to meds right off the bat. He could really use the ability to focus so he is able to learn more of what they can offer at Camelot. So far we have no real progress because they are unable to really get him to focus or give attention to task.

**In our weekly therapy phone call early last week, Lolly mentioned that son#2's "mood med" is given at 8am & 8pm. Now, here at home, when he was doing so well on this "mood med", he was taking it per doctor's orders at 7:30am when he got up & at 2-3pm in the afternoon. You could tell when it was sort of wearing off. And in the mornings he was great about taking it with his orange juice first thing after he got up. So by the time we were getting dressed for school. he was cooperative.
According to Lolly they ONLY give meds at 8am & 8pm. Now, son#2 gets up around 7 or earlier in the morning & goes to bed around 7:30pm.

So I'm thinking, a) Why can't you give it to him in the afternoon because by 8pm he's in bed?! Who needs to be in a good mood in bed? b)Wouldn't it be easier on HIM (and you) if he gets it before he has a chance to get grumpy? and c) He can NOT be the only kid there that needs meds besides at 8am & 8pm. Personally I think this is their way of being lazy about meds. Now if the Dr. says it doesn't matter WHEN the meds build up in his system, I'll go along with it. But this smells of laziness to me--on the part of the nurses. I mean come on, this IS their job description. There's one for every cottage--what ARE they doing between 8am-8pm???

**They clipped son#2's nails & got one too close that bled for a very long time. They acted shocked he wouldn't let them stop the bleeding. I wasn't.
A few years ago, he found a green bean can in the kitchen trash & cut his finger on it. THAT was something of an ordeal. Scary. It bled for over an hour & we chased him around trying to put pressure on it & see how deep of a cut it was. He finally ended up in our bed where he sat still in the bedding long enough for the bleeding to stop. When we had called the EMT's, they had nothing to offer & didn't even approach him to look at it. They blew us off saying it happens a lot with kids & pop cans. By the time we got to the doctor the next day, it was too late for stitches.

Son#2 reopened the fingernail owie the next day & it bled all over again. Even though there's nothing I could have done, it stinks to not be there when your child hurts. Or bleeds. That weighs on me & stays on my mind awhile. He's a tough, tough kid, but he still gets scared.

**Like they had to put him in a "hold" the other day because he came in from outside (on one of our hotter days) and he'd been on a "Fit Walk" in a t-shirt, sweats & hoodie. He got into his room & couldn't get his clothes off fast enough & stripped down. Which he isn't allowed to do. So he got mad, they ended up taking him down to the ground. For a hold--they put him on his belly & one person lays across his arms& one across the legs & if necessary (if they'll headbutt the floor) they have someone hold their head still. He understandably freaked out. (I freaked out hearing this.) and was scared. They realized quickly (Thank goodness!) that son#2 didn't understand what he was supposed to do or not do, so they released him. A worker figured out it was too hot in the cottage & to him and they took care of getting him cooled down.
I had told them in the five hour check-in process the day he came, HE DOES NOT LIKE TO GET TOO HOT. It turns him into the Hulk. I think he gets this from me. And his "Hunger Monster" as Hubbo calls it.

**The other night I called SIX times. The calls are supposed to be kept between 6:30pm to 8pm. Well I called at 6:30--he was in the shower would I call back in ten minutes. Sure--I called back in 15 minutes.
"Ms. S, he's getting dressed, will you call back in ten minutes?"
Sure---called back in 15 minutes---no answer.
Called right back in case they couldn't get to the phone...no answer. Called in ten minutes, no answer. Waited five minutes, called again--no answer.
I stopped by 8pm because I knew he was in bed. THIS is what is frustrating. I can no longer get as many verbal updates from the actual people that take care of him, but when I do call to hear his voice, they don't pick up.

** We did meet son#2's teacher---he seems like a good egg. And he again mentioned our son's lack of focus. Which I told him, has been in the last 3 yrs. He used to have much more attention to things. But he is able to make him work for M&M's sometimes. Which is pretty much the only motivational leverage they all have. But always nice to meet somebody & be on the same page.

**When we visited last Friday night with son#2, we didn't get to see much of him. The therapy session didn't include him. But we did get several things taken care of with Lolly that we needed straightened out. However, we had an hour/half to visit with him afterwards. It can only be done in the cafeteria though. Which was NOT clean. The floor was a mine field of food. And son#2 saw we were there for dinner#2.
With no focus he paces around & doesn't want to sit & play with us. Not that there's much place to play, just tables/chairs. What we noticed were other families coming in & bringing laptops, dvd players and toys/snacks to entertain the kids for the hour and a half. We ended up with son#2 bored & wanting to walk/pace outside in the cold & then going to his cottage early. He knew it was time for snack/movie. But he doesn't get that we can't come in there with him. Very difficult to give up extra time with him, but we are learning.

We go visit this Wednesday the 23rd---and the brothers are going with us. We'll have therapy & then take him out to lunch. He doesn't get to come home for Thanksgiving.
And Christmas is still up in the air. I'm just hoping he's not too bored over the Thanksgiving weekend. I worry the most on the weekends because the staff seems less attentive & like they just don't keep them entertained as well.

So if you're the praying sort, I'd ask you pray for his care givers/staff---that they have patience, love & kindness towards him.
Pray Carson isn't bored, lonely or scared. And that he cooperates & is patient with his workers.
Pray the new "focus med" works & soon. Pray for us here at home that will miss that part of our family over the holiday weekend.
Thank you for caring. Really.

Halloween

2011-11-02T06:50:00.000-07:00

Halloween was entirely too long this year. It needs to just forever be on a weekend night & be done with it. I'm too old to chase kids & do party stuff for days on end! What is this, college?! Don't they know my metabolism is not in the 20 yr old category anymore? And right on the heels of Red Ribbon week where each kid is wearing different from the other, every day of the ding dong week.

That said, the Fall Festival at church was great. HUGE turnout this year and what a lot of energy from the church members. I was completely impressed. I think it was a great outreach because I saw as many strangers as people I recognized. Son#3 had a friend come and they played till they dropped. While son#1 has impressed me with his completely normal (yet still literal) teenagery behavior. I went over to him to see if he was having a good time & he said:
"Please don't talk to me. I don't want to stand with you." *Sigh!* Yep, he's 13.

Halloween night was a bit sad for me, I felt a piece of our family puzzle was missing & it just wasn't as fun for me. But son#1 went as Darth Vader while son#2 went as a Jedi from the Light side of the Force.
They really enjoyed all parts of Halloween and son#1 even brought his own theme music around with him. *sigh!* That was a nice surprise Hubbo discovered when the first door opened. He did get compliments & we all probably secretly want our own theme music to play as we walk down the street.
*Note to self, back off the pumping up of his self-esteem.

Hubbo took them around the neighborhood Trick-Or-Treating while I stayed in (I lost my voice & have a sinus infection.)and called son#2 at Camelot.
Son#2 got to do Trunk or Treat at one of the director's church down the road. I believe it was the Holiness Tabernacle Baptist church so there may have possibly been some extra "ghosts" around.
For his costume Lolly said that they made t-shirts for the kids according to their personality.
One boy who likes to rip his shirts off (watched wrestling too much I imagine) got a green t-shirt that said: HULK.
Son#2 LOVES to sniff things. Lotion, soap, cleaner, etc. And heaven forbid you're chewing gum, put on smelly chapstick, have a mint in your mouth or his fav--just drank some coffee.
He has no personal space issues with takin' a big ol' whiff of your breath.
So his t-shirt they made said "Scratch & Sniff".
I miss that kid.

Thank goodness we don't have to dress up or do anything but EAT for the next holiday.

Trip Update

2011-10-31T11:21:00.000-07:00

We got to go visit son#2 at "camp" this Saturday. And a 2 hr pass to take him to
lunch after "therapy".
**As a side note for the reader, I will refer to our mandatory trips to Rose Rock from here on out as "therapy".**
So far I've not found anything that's helping us or Carson in these sessions
yet. Sure we get information on his week or weeks, but it's nothing they couldn't
convey over the phone. So I'm not sure this constitutes REAL therapy yet.
I personally, pictured these as sessions we would be learning techniques for how
to handle situations that arise in the care & changes of caring for son#2. Not so far.

This week's "therapy" was spent mostly discussing a big bite son#2 incurred on
his right forearm after we left LAST Friday evening. It seems his roomate got
angry & bit him. When I saw it, it was a large softball sized green faded bruise. Lolly mentioned it as black the day she saw it. Now, we know how quickly things can happen with kids. It goes by in front of your face in slow motion &
you just can't get there in time. But for us not to be informed about it until
TUESDAY, got the mother hen in me up & running.

Turns out he and the roommate are supposed to both have 1:1 ratio of staff. So there SHOULD have been SOMEONE there to see it.If I understand it correctly, one of the boys staff (or both?) went to dinner without telling anyone else. Which left the boys alone. And although they took him to the nurse right away, it wasn't really reported. So we didn't get a call until Tuesday night.
Lolly (as I'm gonna call her) the therapist, said that someone DID get written up & higher ups took care of addressing the situation so it won't happen again.

Son#2's stuffy nose is a tad better but it's sad that they aren't listening to me on antihistamines interacting with his regular meds and making him angry. Like Hulk angry. So angry in fact, that he ran his head at the window Thursday night. He had a green goose egg when we saw him Saturday. *sigh!*
I've told the nurse in person when we checked him in & went through everything about meds & behavior with her. She even took notes. Then when we were there last Friday I told the same nurse in person again. She even made grunts that she understood. Yet she called me Thursday night while we were at the pumpkin patch and wondered why son#2 would be so aggressive out of the blue.
I'm beginning to think she's a visual learner that may need the PECS (picture exchange system) to get the message.
My sister-in-law told me we ought to make her a shirt that has instructions on it but with that being considered laundry, they'd probably just loose it.

Oh, on that issue of him not wearing his clothes & them not finding them, they were able to find them all after I sent an email asking how I was supposed to trust them with the care of my offspring if they couldn't even keep track of his clothes. Will wonders never cease!

We took son#2 to IHOP for a nice lunch & then to Wal-Mart to get a couple more long-sleeved shirts. He was a tad hyper and kept taking his shoes off. He even tried to run off in the parking lot & store.
The interesting part was when we go to take him on pass we have to strip him down for the nurse to write any bruises & marks down so they can tell what happens on who's shift of caring for him. And then when we return it's the same scenario but in addition to filing out paperwork about what we did & his behavior during the outing.
I told Hubbo this felt like jail. He joked when we brought him back that it was time to go get patted down to see if he had a shiv. (With his roommate the biter he may just need it! lol)

After two weekends back to back down there, we're looking forward to time at home this coming weekend & not being in the car as much.

**Thanks to the Updike family for watching sons#1 & 3 for us Saturday. And for waking yourselves at the butt crack of dawn to do it happily.**

Ten Things Tuesday

2011-10-25T11:55:00.000-07:00

The visit & therapy with Carson went okay Friday evening. And we did enjoy our anniversary plans, but boy are we exhausted. Mentally & physically.
Some things about the visit & this past few days haven't been so great...usually I'm an upbeat person but today is about some dissatisfaction so please bear with me.
And since there is no Congressional committee (shocking since there's one for every other occasion) that cares about my grievances, you lucky few get to hear my complaints.

Ten Things I'm Currently Displeased About:

1. Son#2 was wearing someone else's pants when we got to visit him Friday night. A tad shocking considering there's only one kid as big as him.

2. Therapist was just as I had pictured her matching her voice. Young, unmarried, no kids & rather naive. I don't need Nancy Nice, I need Greta Go-Getter. And she tried to tell us son#2 only had two pairs of shorts! What?! When we checked him in, he had 7+ pairs. And every piece of clothing had a big white laundry tag ironed in with his first & last name on it. *sigh!*

3. We dropped off more pants, a hoodie and two hats I knitted for him---by Saturday night they couldn't find them. Or the bag they came in that I did not intend to leave.

4. Son#2 had the worst stuffed up nose I've ever heard when we were there Friday night. He even had some weird tic sniffing thing he was doing we've never seen. And with a deviated septum already, we're afraid that this summer's headbutting spree could have complicated that situation. It was sad at how little air he was getting. At one point we were afraid he would pass out. Seriously.
Give him a decongestant you say? I wish. They react with the meds he takes & make him angry.
He does seem to be better but it was bad there for awhile. He was so pitiful.

5. We aren't getting much information. Unless LaToya is there, we don't talk to anyone. They just leave the phone on speaker for son#2 to listen to us. Last night he was giggly which was nice but no one to ask what he had for dinner or how his day was. Boo!
It's like the left hand doesn't talk to the right hand. I'm not sure they are even attached to the same body at this point.

6. I got a call this afternoon from the nurse that son#2 had a big bruise on his right forearm. It apparently happened right after we left Friday night. His roomate got angry & bit him. No idea why. And no one caught it till yesterday--weekend staff--but they were too busy yesterday to call me & inform me about it.

7. The weekend staff that we met, although older than me, seems to be like having teenagers babysit. They don't want to get in trouble or do anything helpful, they just want to get their paycheck and go home. At least this is how "Upset Mommy" is viewing things today through angry eyes.

8. The therapist informed us Friday that we need one more in person meeting before the end of this month. That just leaves THIS weekend. Back to back is pretty hard. But since it was her boo-boo, she decided to offer to come in Saturday morning and let us do therapy then so Hubbo doesn't miss any work.
Then we *do* get our first pass with son#2 and get to take him to lunch for a couple of hours. THAT is going to be the highlight of my week!!

9. Okay, okay...I got all the negative out & I'm not a gonna leave on a sad note. I'm just not wired that way.
I'm SUPER thankful my awesome Moms could come & stay with the kids this whole weekend. She had fun but had to endure A LOT of games, puzzles & books with son#3. I think she was very glad to get home but enjoyed her time with us.
And I know both the kids did.

And a funny son#1 story...
10. When we took my Moms to lunch after church Sunday, we chose an authentic Mexican restaurant. We had to stop and get son#1 some fries from Carl's Jr. to take with him to eat. You can totally tell we didn't/don't get out often because this was his observation--thankfully whispered(albeit loudly) to me.
After seeing the waiters take our drink & food orders, he leans over to me & says, "Why is that guy acting Mexican?"

Happy Anniversary!

2011-10-18T06:37:00.000-07:00

Today is our 14th wedding anniversary!! We have beaten some serious odds. The divorce rate for parents of Autistic children is 85%!!
No marriage is perfect because none of us have that privileged title individually. We're flawed humans just trying to make it work together. To me it feels good to have someone by your side, helping you fight, love & laugh through the hills & valleys. So good that sometimes you wanna strangle them in their sleep. (Did I say that out loud?)

Life is never easy for any one person and when you combine two people the baggage can sometimes overwhelm the union. For us it's all about having God guiding your decisions, family and friends to fall back on when you're not able to hold yourselves up, and being able to be yourself.
I don't have some secret key to making marriage work, I don't have really good advice other than be yourself. Be genuine and like yourself. Don't loose yourself. I think of it as we had security & confidence in ourselves when we were young & met, so if we keep that going, it's most likely attractive to the other person wouldn't you say? You give your husband time...you give your kids time & attention...why wouldn't God want you to give yourself that?

Anyway, we get to truly go out & celebrate our anniversary for the first time in double digit years. This Friday we leave for the City to go do family therapy with son#2 and then spend the night somewhere. To me it doesn't matter where as long as there's no dogs in my bed and no kids waking me up.
Dinner out & tickets to a local playhouse will round out the weekend Saturday. I can't tell you how excited we are to just be alone together for more than an hour!! It's the little things I'm tellin ya! Enjoy them & everything else is gravy.

Ten Things Tuesday

2011-10-12T07:51:00.000-07:00

What? I can pretend. Shut up.

Ten Things I'm Thankful For Since We Have A Little Less Autism in the House:

10. I can leave everything unlocked!!!!!! Food,the fridge,cabinets,trash,cleaning products--the list is endless!!!!

9. We can eat when we're hungry & not on a scheduled plan. Not to mention the bonus of getting to leave dishes out or on the stove if I want & no one will play in it.

8. We can eat OUT as a family!!

7. My water bill is considerably lower & there's A LOT less laundry-towels/sheets. I need new towels though--after so much washing they look like someone tried to gnaw their way out of 'em.

6. I can have decorations out around the house & candles lit--for the first time EVER!

5. I have time to myself in my own house!! My thoughts get finished (most of the time) and I don't feel like a Tasmanian devil.

4. One less school to keep up with. Papers, meetings, special days & occasions, backpacks & snacks.

3.I can soap out in my bathroom & kitchen without the fear of someone eating it.

2.I can have my front door open to watch for the bus in the mornings & afternoons or just to watch for the mail.

1. And the number one reason I am thankful to have a little less Autism in my house is--Hiney wiping. It has been almost a month since I've wiped someone else's hiney. It makes me wanna cry.

Visiting Hours Are Over

2011-10-09T06:39:00.001-07:00

We got to go up to the City & see son#2 last night!! I was like a kid waiting for Santa. The brothers were excited but they were at opposite ends of the spectrum on it. #3 was excited to see his brother & play with his toys. #1 was NOT excited about having to travel & leave the house (a.k.a computer) at all. I packed stuff for the kids since 2 hrs in the car each way is very new to them. Charged all our electronic devices & the portable dvd player and through in their favorite movies. I got some snacks, to go visit we leave so early, yet it falls right in the middle of dinnertime & to wait until after visitation is too late for the kids. And me.
Son#3 and I also worked on making cards for #2
to hang up on his wall of family pictures & such.

We need rain here so badly, and about half way there it started pouring. And it didn't stop until about the same point on the way home. Dry as a bone here at the house. Go figure.

We met son#2 in the cafeteria--we got there right at 6pm when visitation starts. We waited awhile because he was finishing up a shower after dinner.
But as soon as I saw him outside, I ran to him & the first thing he did was kiss me right on the mouth!!! My baby missed me!!!!!
He smiled and we went in to see everyone, who was already staring out the window because I'd been squealing like a school girl.

He was a little confused meeting in the cafeteria. Their days are so scheduled, he knew he'd already been there, eaten dinner & was supposed to be in his room. So like the son we know and love, he started his hunt for food.
But once he settled down & started chasing his little brother around & ignoring son#1, he was fine. He watched one of his favorite videos with son#3 and I could tell he had missed his Sesame Street peeps. He stared at that screen forever. I couldn't stop touching him. Hugging & leaning, loving & just snuggling him.

Son#2's personal assistant--"PA" (24/7 staff person that rotates out in shifts/days) is the same girl we met the first day-LaToya. So it was nice we could chat with her again & really get an idea of what's been going on. We've had phone calls of bruises & scratches--some explained, some not. As a mom, that's difficult being so far away. He's a boy,I get that bruises & scratches will happen--especially with this kid. But getting a call that your kid has a bruise on his cheek and you're so far away & no one can tell you HOW it happened...sucks rotten eggs. You feel helpless & a tiny bit like you failed because you didn't keep him safe. I'm still trying to understand with a personal assistant with you 24/7, how you have an unexplainable bruise. But when I saw him, saw it was all okay, he looked great, I could move on. The nightly phone calls are nice--when they remember.But, nothing beats seeing him in person!!

Leaving wasn't as difficult as I thought it'd be. For me or him. He was ready for meds & bed and I was just content to see him & know he's okay. There's something heart warming about knowing that he had fish nuggets, green beans,and macaroni & cheese for dinner and that he might get to go to the park today. Son#3 was the crier. He bawled & bawled that he didn't want to leave his brother. And he didn't get to go to see his room & play with his toys. It was cute.
It was a little bit of a stressful drive home with all the rain and the kids being tired & cranky in the backseat. However, to this mama, it was ALLLLLLLLLLLLL worth it. Totally.

Seasons Change

2011-10-06T17:34:00.000-07:00

Hello again.
So much has changed since my last blog that I hardly know where to start.
After a very long & challenging summer with son#2, we were able to have prayers answered recently for his care.
He has struggled with some manic issues this summer and after trying FIVE different medicines, we ended up pretty bad violent outbursts for the whole month of August. It took the bad med two weeks to leave his system, but once we found the med that was "just right", it was smooth sailing.
However, it became glaringly obvious that son#2 needed some help with new habits. And his medicines dealt with in a controlled environment where we weren't left with six holes in the walls to repair & he didn't end up with two big black eyes. It was much more than we were sadly able to provide him with.

After much frustration at turning to people with supposed expert advise & resources, we met a brick wall. (When the local Autism Resource Center doesn't know where to point you, someone's not doing their job (RESOURCE center?)OR we have a truly unique individual that God has entrusted us with.
We believe God opens doors. And ours came in the form of a place ironically called Camelot.

At Camelot they didn't blink when I mentioned son#2's meds, his violent outbursts, his non-toileting issues, naked time or sensory affinity for poo. That's right, I said it. If that rankles your tail feathers you might as well stop reading now.
Camelot welcomed us, knew what to do with son#2, and had a plan of attack on all the above mentioned issues & more. Camelot even had an opening September 8th. That could only be God people!!!

So many questions. Camelot is a live in, residential treatment facility & so son#2 will have to live there 24/7 for anywhere from a few months, to a year or more.
I don't know that I could have been more scared & relieved all at the same time.
We went for an interview and then they got to know about son#2 and his issues.
They finally approved him and to boot, he gets one on one staff. That means wherever he goes he has one person that is his personal staff attendant.
Which it IS a full-time job keeping son#2's hands out of his pants. I'm sure he's not the only male with that problem...

I didn't have warm fuzzies about the place, but after checking around they seem to know their stuff & to be honest, the next closest place that takes non-verbal Autistic kids is Kansas.
Two hours to Oklahoma City doesn't look too bad.
Checking in took hours & hours. And we even had to inventory his stuff & put his name on all his clothes. Sounds like checking your parent into a nursing home doesn't it? You know they need the service & care they can provide. You know you've done all you can do, but still, to leave them there in someone else's care...
it's the hardest thing you've ever done. It is for me.

Son#2 is easily adjusting. He does love the Build-A-Bear bunny we got & recorded my voice on. He's sleeping with it & loves to push the mommy button over & over. His brothers helped "build" it. When it came to making a special wish for son#2, and kissing the heart, I found it so endearing son#1 was over to the side really talking to the little red heart. I hugged him & asked what he wished for his brother.
"To never come home so I can have my own room." *sigh!* That's a teenager for ya!
The brothers know he's away for a long time. To not let them think he was being sent away for bad behavior, we told them it was camp. And so they wouldn't want to go themselves, we said it was to learn potty training & how to keep his clothes on. The first day after he was gone, son#3 asked me as soon as he got off the bus, "Did you go get him yet?"

His workers & staff are literally arguing over who gets to be his one on one.
That's comforting. I pray daily no one abuses him, hurts him or looses their patience. That they keep him safe & healthy. And that he shows him on smart he is & learns some new habits.
He's taking lots of walks and keeps a tight schedule. The good news is they call almost every night. We get to be on speaker phone & hear him laugh and he looks intently at the phone when we talk. And sometimes hangs up on us or puts us on hold.

It's quite an adjustment. There's relief of the tension with which we're used to carrying in ourselves and there's also grief for me. Hubbo has a better time with the big picture. While MY head knows that & I'm a smart girl, my heart feels much differently about the situation.
I'm amazed by the workmanship God created in the human form! We can feel so many emotions that usually cancel one another out, yet all at the same time---andd my heart doesn't explode. At least not yet. Check back in with me next week.

In the meantime, if you pray, please say a little prayer for son#2 when you think of us. This is a challenge & while it is going to be a good thing for him & our family, they WILL be asking things of him he won't want to do---otherwise we would be doing them here.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-12-07T13:23:00.000-08:00

Ten Things Tuesday

1. Sugar-Free Vanilla Carmel coffee creamer. To me it tastes like maple flavored oatmeal. Yum!! And more importantly it gets me up & around in the mornings.

2. I'm thankful that even though I overslept this morning, I STILL got my son's lunch made & breakfast in time to catch the bus. All that in ten minutes.

3. Son#3 is soooo excited this year about presents & Christmas, so it's fun to see his eyes light up at every thing he sees a commercial for. When you have son#2 that has never been able to tell us or Santa a Christmas list...you'd be thankful too.

4. I'm very appreciative to get to know a new fellow mother in the trenches battling Autism. She has other things on her plate as we all do, but she's a strong mom and that makes her an ally. I am always thankful for another one of those.

5. Our Christmas party at book club was last night and I was in charge of the craft. I was very pleased it went well. But I'm praying for one of our regulars who missed for the first time in I can't remember how long. Ms. Evelyn is 90 years old. I know the holidays will be a little less joyous for her family with her in a nursing facility, but she's a strong woman and I know she can get better. It wouldn't be the first Christmas miracle.

6. My house is getting more organized--closets & rooms--feels GOOD. Clutter BE GONE!!!!!!

7. Even with teacher gifts, I only have a couple more gifts to get. Hallelujah!!

8. I'm thankful for Dr F that sees my kids and that she listens to ME. She is available to us. I can email, call her office or home. And I even have her cell number. She and nurse Gina are our biggest blessings with our kids Autism. They've been with us since 2000.

9. By some wild miracle, my husband made it into his Fantasy Football playoffs. He had a great season, but by some weird rules that don't make sense to girls, he almost didn't make it in. But he did. I'm thankful that I don't have to hear about that anymore. Don't tell him I said that. He thinks I'm just happy for him.

10. Pot roast is in the crockpot. Roasted potatoes on a cold winters night...I'm thankful my family has the choice of the food they want & a warm house to enjoy it in. And that we aren't too busy to eat dinner together tonight.

And a bonus 11. I am SO thankful that a dear, dear friend of mine was proposed to by a man that sees her for the wonderful, giving person she is. And will honor her all the days of their lives!! YAY!!!!

Hurry, Hurry, Rush, Rush, Rush!

2010-12-02T13:24:00.000-08:00

December took off like a one horse open sleigh so I'm late and will be quick with my praise & thankfulness this week.

1. December is FINALLY here! I love the holidays and the coziness of the dark nights and fun, warm times at home. We've been doing puzzles, board games & baking like there's no tomorrow.

2. Decorating is DONE as of today. WHEW! Took longer than I thought. I usually do it during Thanksgiving break but I was too busy/tired to do it this year. And I wanted to wait until I was in the spirit. Son#3 had a TON O FUN this year helping hang things all around the house.

3. Son#2 is almost totally healed up after the pulling of the front tooth completely out incident. But he is ticking now. Already been several days now, hoping it subsides. So that whole door closes & another opens, isn't always a fun door to go through. But he's been a trooper with changing his room and bed around. So the flexibility has been appreciated since I know he's not 100%.

4. I have been getting an insane amount of honey-do's off my list around the house. YIPPEE!!! The garage is still in turmoil, so much so we're not parking in there right now. But I've assured Hubbo that to get organized you have to make a bigger mess. RIGHT?

5. I've made some very nice purchases lately & gotten some great deals---there ARE some positive things to us all being in the same boat with the economy.

6. Our insurance was the same for years. Then about a month ago, it switched with hardly any warning. In that month we had that, I didn't need to use it. But now, we've switched AGAIN & thankfully this company had it's ducks in a row, and everything I have needed, hasn't had a hiccup. Whew!!!

7. We have a new tv in the living room. It was time, since the old beast was one Hubbo had before we got married. It's seen a lot, including son#2 pulling it off & breaking his leg with it at 2 yrs old.
It was losing sound & people were starting to look like Oompah Loompahs. Or maybe that was just all the spray tans on my shows. Either way, I can hear it in the kitchen now which is a nice perk.

8. To add to this new TV I have the added perk of my cable company putting people's names & numbers on my tv screen when my phone rings to tell me who it is. Fancy Smancy! But more useful than I thought.

9. I ate chips & salsa yesterday till I almost puked. I loved every minute of it.

10. Son#1 has a picture in an art show today at one of the local colleges. Since his daddy was an art major, much rejoicing will be had tonight.

Gobble, Gobble!!

2010-11-25T10:44:00.000-08:00

Thankful days. But today especially. When we went around the table to say what we were thankful for, this is the awesomeness I heard.

Hubbo said he was thankful for his wife & three wonderful sons.

Son#1 said he was thankful for Nana, Julie when she's not singing & Mrs. Moses. (I swear I can carry a tune.)

Son#3 was thankful for many, many things he couldn't shut up during our dinner. The main ones I heard repeated were, "My Jedi, choo-choo train & my green, green tractor."

I was talking about how I was thankful we had food, the money for the food & family to share it with, if we'd wanted to do that. And how so very thankful I was for three children from Ethiopia that have a new family to live with here in the States this Thanksgiving. That family is truly thankful this year. All four of my boys are healthy & love me--when I don't sing---so how could I ask for anything else?

Son#2, could he talk, I feel confident that he'd say he was thankful for---deviled eggs, mashed potatoes, dressing, turkey, rolls, green bean casserole & pie.
Trust me on this.

Gobble, gobble from our home to yours!

Ten Thanksgiving Thankful Things

2010-11-23T11:18:00.000-08:00

Gobble, gobble!
Happy Thanksgiving week!!
Here we go...some serious, some fun, but all real & true.

1. I'm truly thankful for FALL. It's my favorite season, the clothes, I LOVE LOVE the clothes. And jackets. I'm a bit of a jacket hoarder. Just ask my husband who sadly owns 3. I take up many closets with my collection. They're like sad puppies I can't pass up, I have to give them homes.
I wish fall was 8 months out of the year, 2 month of winter & 2 months of spring. I'd be a happy woman.
In Oklahoma, fall is like a relative you love but only see a few times a year. Makes it extra special & I'm more likely to savor every single fall day.

2. Scarves & jewelry. Love my accessories. They make me happy & proud to be a girl.

3. Vitamins--love my vitamin that gets me going in the mornings. I take it at night, the next morning I pop outta bed. Except when it's really cold. Then I hobble to the thermostat & then get back & bed to snuggle till I'm warmed to a good temp.

4. What would fall be without all the MANY, MANY blankets & throws around my house. Some of you may think, but she has those out all the time. True, so think just how many there are out now!

5. Crafts--this is the time of year I go to craft shows, make crafty things & especially make some Christmas presents. SO fun to actually give something you made.

6. Sunday I got to see a cousin I hardly see anymore and she is so extra special to me. Her husband served us all in Iraq and we're thrilled he's home, and safe. She is currently pregnant with a girl, and I was so very happy to see the whole family and enjoy their company.
Her pregnancy is having some bumps, but she is one strong woman & I know God will be watching out for that precious baby Bethany that's still cookin in the oven.

7. Sunday morning son#1 was looking forward to class and sharing his high/low of the week. But it turned out hsi teacher was gone. Change! Oh no!! Son#1 had a meltdown, and one of my sweetest friends, sat in the hallway with him & talked him down off his ledge. Really worked him through it. I had no idea until after the fact. I was SO relieved to know I had backup, even when I didn't know I needed it. What a blessing she was--she knows who she was--a true friend I'm so thankful for her sacrifice of her own class to sit there & help son#1.

8. Son#2 got into a rage yesterday & pulled out his other (remember the other one is gone as of last May) front tooth. Whole permanent tooth. Root and all.
Poor kid. Due to his Autism there isn't much to do for him until he's an adult or at some much higher level of development that will let us do implants or a bridge. So until then, all he wants for Christmas is his two front teeth.
I'm thankful for all of the cool heads that prevailed yesterday from the teacher, Hubbo, friends that prayed for me/him & the dentist who called from home before he left on his trip. We're surrounded by angels sometimes.

9. Some friends have had car accidents this week and I'm SO thankful that no one was hurt in either accident. People are starting to get crazy, cranky & distracted---be careful!

10. This year I decided we'd stay home & have our own Thanksgiving with just the five of us. It's so terrific because we don't have lug the kids out anywhere or be on alert with them. We get to stay home in our kid proof home and eat at a leisurely pace. Not to mention we won't need the rest of the break to catch back on energy.
I'm so thankful for this decision and I'm looking forward to it a lot.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-11-16T06:39:00.000-08:00

1. What beautiful weather! Here it's rainy, cold and just brisk. I love that! And our ground around here really needed the rain so I'm especially thankful for that. (If only we got to stay in bed hibernating right?)

2. Son#3 toe walks to compensate for a hip that was turned in when he came out of the womb. Now it's just habit we try to correct with that Pants on the Ground song...Heels on the Ground, Heels on the Ground.
I'm very thankful that Physical Therapy for son#3 is decreasing after just a year! Instead of twice a week, we're going to twice a month!

3. On that same note I'm thrilled that son#1 that didn't speak till he was 4 years old, and is now 12, will not need any speech therapy anymore! It hasn't been a chore, but it does make us feel excited with a reminder that son#1 has come such a long way. Go God!!

4. November is Adoption Awareness month. I'm thankful that a friend is heading with her husband to Africa today to pick up her newest children. These people are salt of the earth, (I call them Salties.) have three children already and are opening their home & hearts to three more. Two are brothers, what a blessing to them that they get to stay together right?
And this little girl---what a brave child and an exciting time she has ahead of her as a member of that family.
I'm so pleased for them & proud to know them.

5. I'm looking forward to Friday when I go to a yearly event a local church called The Christmas Gathering. They liken it to HGTV meets Oprah's Favorite Things show. We see lots of decorating tips, gifts to give and holiday recipes. We eat, laugh and get lots of fun, free things.:) This year I'm not only going with my usual girls, but several of my bunko chicks. FUN TIMES! Don't wait up!

6. Lately I've been realizing that my rushed schedule with the kids school times this year is really a blessing in disguise. It means son#3 and I get to have lunch together every day. At first it was just rushed & chaotic. Now I'm making time to try and eat with him, and chit chat about our morning & what fun he'll have at school. He goes to all day kindergarten next year. And this school year is half gone. I'm savoring every lunch because pretty soon I'll be eating alone. Be careful what you pray for, you may just get it.

7. Well, yesterday son#1 had "the talk" at school. They showed the video to the 7th graders. We agreed to let him see it figuring he's a visual learner, this may help & we can expand on any questions he has.
Yesterday when he came home I was nervous. I could hear him asking me if I knew I had a vagina.
But nope. Na-da.
"How was your day? Anything exciting happen?"
"Good. Nothing exciting."
" /exhale"
But don't worry, I'm not lulled into a false sense of peace. It's coming, some scary inappropriate question at an even more inappropriate time. Like when I asked my mom at 5 yrs old, what a maxi pad was for. And she told me.

8. On a different note, son#1 has all A's for this 9 weeks at school!! YAY! *Snoopy dance!*

9. This Sunday we have a family baby shower for one of the first girl babies amongst my cousins. Girly stuff is a fun thing for me since I don't get to see much pink, umm EVER.

10. And my final thing today is my hair appointment tonight. You'd be thankful too if you could see my roots.:)

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-11-09T11:28:00.000-08:00

Missed me?

What better way to update you on what's been going on the past 6 months AND kick off Thanksgivings than a Ten Things Tuesday!!

1. I am thankful to have had the best summer I've had with the kids in years. And by best I mean least stressful & drama filled. Mommy had energy to do things with them & we enjoyed the downtime too.

2. Son#1 is enjoying middle school/7th grade better this year. And we're so thankful for all of our teachers. What a blessing from God. We try never to take any of them for granted---past OR present.
Son#2 is big man on campus in his class and really maturing with his progress. The "baby", who's in pre-K is not teh shy kid anymore. He is vivacious and the life of the party now.

3. With this new school year, my schedule has changed as well. That afternoon pre-K class has killed my time alone. I have one leaving at 7am, one at 8:30am, then son#3 at 12:45ish.
But then they start coming home at 3pm &4pm. That means mommy only gets 2 hrs alone. That seems like a lot until you have to workout, shower, catch up on housework, fold some laundry or all the other things we do that don't include sitting on the couch eating bon bons. But I'm thankful for those 2 hrs alone like you wouldn't believe!

4. After VBS in July son#1 & son#3 have been going to church with me on Sunday mornings. We've waited almost 5 years for this. And I'm SO pleased with how much they love it. And how well son#1 has adjusted to the changes. #3 is loving class & sings his songs all the time. He's even memorized memory verses. They beg me daily to go. And I'm pleased we've added in Wednesday night too. Hubbo & son#2 are still at home holding down the fort, but with baby steps I think we'll all be back eventually. It's a good feeling & I'm so thankful to several friends for making it possible.

5. Halloween went SO well this year. I'm so thankful it's the best we've ever had. We did the church carnival and son#1 just chased some kid dressed like a ninja, while son#3 enjoyed all the games & discovered he loves chocolate. Son#2 had fun pacing around enjoying the acquostics in the gym & the playground. Then #1 and #3 went Trick-or-Treating with Daddy while son#2 and I handed out candy at the door.
We did a Darth Vader pumpkin and a local pumpkin patch. The kids really had a good time & that means we had a good time.

6. Well, son#2 started having some facial swelling recently and turns out he had an infection with a baby tooth and a permanent one that was erupting through his gums. OUCHIE WA-WA! Poor kiddo. We did some serious antibiotics and then thankfully we got into the dental surgery in 2 weeks. A long two weeks but the list was so long, we were thankful it wasn't any longer. Son#2 is much happier. And trust me, you WANT son#2 to be happy.
At 5'2 and 160lbs now, it's like making The Hulk mad.

7. I am taking over our book club in January. I'm so thankful for all those ladies, that I I'm pleased to undertake it.
I have big shoes to fill, but hopefully Obi-Wan...er, I mean Marilyn has taught me well.

8. I've been a knitting fool lately. And I'm thankful to have a hobby that allows me to get out some angst, stress, boredom & nervous energy. Plus, it keeps my hands too busy to eat. Most of the time.

9. My Christmas shopping is almost done. I'm through with mom, son#3 & Hubbo. I'm sure I'll pick up some more stocking stuffers but in general I'd say I'm 90% done. It's been easy to just see something, think that'd be good for Christmas & just get it. That's a good feeling. And you know what's even better? Knowing where they're all hidden and knowing it's not in a trash bag in the garage. heh

10. I'm very pleased that this year for Thanksgiving, it was my idea to stay home. Just our family of five to enjoy the time off & together--no stress. No traveling 1 hr to hurry around keeping kids in check/fed. And then driving 1 hr back. And then taking the rest of the weekend to rest up. Usually the holiday traveling is for the kids or family--not what's easiest on us. Hubbo really takes the brunt of the stress too because he gets to hold onto son#2. Always exhausting. So this Thanksgiving I'm planning on being extremely thankful for the time to focus on my family & enjoy just them.

BOYS!

2010-07-08T11:31:00.000-07:00

Five minutes ago, my third son (4 yrs old) came up as I was trying to work on the computer. Chatter is all I hear. He's giving me commentary on the cartoons he's watching at the time, so I'm mumbling "yeah, uh huh, okay" in response to everything. Then I realize in my parental 3 second delay, he just said something about "spraying you". HUH?!
Here's the conversation:

Son#3: "I spray you and make you all wet."
(giggle)

me: "Fine..............wait, WHAT?"
I glance over to my left, he has his wee-wee out of the top of his pull-up aiming it at my face with a big smile on his face.
me: "WHOA WHOA WHOA--NO! You never spray anyone with that. It only sprays in the toilet."

Son#3: "It's rude?

me: "YES--it's VERY VERY rude."
BOYS!

The Fort Knox of Kitchens

2010-06-30T11:41:00.001-07:00

No school this week so it's been a crazy few days. Son#2 is getting bored and finding things to occupy his time which reminds me to give you a quick six things I had to remove from the kitchen and lock up because of son#2.

1. Knives in the knife block have been fine since forever. This summer, he figured out what they were, and pulled them all out one day and lined them up on the counter. They are banished to the garage. Not fun in the middle of cooking to go unlock the garage and find yourself a knife.

2. No more dishtowels out in the kitchen. I can't hang one on the cabinet door handle. He's decided they are great to soak in water and lay all around the counters. Even paper towels are ify some days.

3. The fridge. Yes it already had a lock, but son#2 discovered early this summer that if he uses his Samson strength and pulls hard enough, he can pop that lock. So now we have a double lock on the fridge.

4. I also have to double knot my seat cushions on the kitchen chairs because if I don't, he comes around and unties them all and throws them around the house or hides them.

5. Cooking oil in a pretty bottle on the counter top. Son#2 discovered it. I don't remember this particular tip from Rachel Ray about EVOO, but apparently it makes great moisturizer for dry skin. Banished to the garage.

6. And lastly, Son#2 has discovered the alarm on one particular kitchen cabinet is out of batteries and it contains our spices & baking supplies. I've caught him I don't know how many times sniffing the Cumin and had to remove the vanilla altogether because it was dwindling in ounces. The vanilla had to be banished to the cabinet with the cooking spray and oil before DHS came to take away my Mexican vanilla drinking wino son who is about to turn 10 years old.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-06-22T13:41:00.000-07:00

As suggested by a friend, I give you ten tips that help ME survive the summer.

1. Going out at least once every 7 days with some other adult female for fun. (movies, scrapbooking, dinner, shopping, mani/pedi)
Going out at least every 3 days by myself for errands, book store, library or for reading by myself while enjoying some beverage.

2. My iTouch (iPod). It's instrumental in drowning out kids arguing, yelling, playing or their cartoons. I use it when cooking dinner, doing chores or folding laundry. It's an extra bonus to use for audio books. Really lets you escape the chaos that is summer--at least at my house.

3. I get my chores or To Do list for the day, done by noon or it doesn't get done. This is true throughout the year not just summer. But it's instrumental as I age that I know where my energy lies and how to tap into and use it.

4. If I have to do something seriously unpleasant, say a sink full of dishes that I've let go and I'm out of spoons, well I call a friend and catch up, WHILE I do my dishes. It's a reward for myself. Time flies by on the phone right?

5. I have two nightgowns that are my favorites. They look like sundresses and I find them SO comfy & cool (the main key to not loosing my temper in the summer) on Fridays when the kids aren't in summer school, I stay in them till late in the day. And I race to put them on after dinner.

6. Books. I love a good Harlequin or just something extremely fun. I am able to read a few pages and put it down off/on throughout the day when the kids need refills, snacks or help with something. It keeps my mind out fo the kid zone of cartoons & Star Wars which means I don't loose brain cells quite as quickly. I'm sure that's been medically proven somewhere.

7. I take the kids every 10 days to the library. Ours has summer reading programs with prize motivators for the kids in reading books. They love picking books/dvds and I love getting them to read and relish books & the escape. It's also a nice way to get them to be quiet during at least part of the day. (our library even has big people movies) And with being able to request them online, and emailed when they get in, it's the perfect system.

8. I'm trying a new system of marbles in a jar at home this summer by suggestion of a friend. It's better than my chore chart I started out with--less rigid which fits my kids better and me too, because then I can make it up as I go along instead of trying to remember all of what I said days ago.
So you put a jar out & they get a marble for doing good things, chores or being nice to each other, listening the first time etc. When the jar is full, they get to pick: go somewhere special, play date or buy a toy.
The genius is you can take the marbles OUT as well. So with a pre-teen sassy McSasser or whining by a 4 yr old---we get some taken away. Motivation!!

9. I'm also trying to do at least something fun/new every two days. Yesterday we made caterpillars out of egg cartons. Something new to play with, make, take up time. You get the idea. I think tomorrow we're making play dough.

And number 10---well I figured out two summers ago that with three kids home, doing breakfast, lunch & dinner + snacks, that I had a buttload (that's the technical term for it) of dishes to do. SO, I switched to paper plates & my life is A LOT easier. I love it. For $3.12 I get 45 paper plates (WM brand) and go through them in 10 days to 2 weeks. SO worth it. Sometimes if they were used for something like a Poptart, I rinse and reuse. *gasp!! I still have to use a lot of spoons/knives but paper cups/plates can make or break a mom.

There you have it! Some of my secrets to surviving summer home with the kiddos. Questions are always welcome!

8.

Ten Things Thursday

2010-06-17T07:31:00.001-07:00

Wow what a reprieve I've been on huh? Last bit of school took way more attention than I thought. And then after a week off, summer school started up. Luckily the busy frenzy has been a good thing--just enough without being too much.

1. Thank you dear Jesus that summer is going well without too many upsets so far! (knock on wood)

2. The library has a great selection of dvd's and books for the kids. And the summer reading program with their "prizes" has son#3 occupied at least once a week.

3. We've done some experiements already--submarine filled with baking powder that dives & dives. We are also set to let a Mentos/2 liter Coke rocket go soon.

4. I've been to my bookstore about 3 times so far, accumulating all kinds of new authors and finding books a great distraction from all the noise. With son#3 not napping this year, he is chattering ALL. THE. TIME.

5. I have a new crafting table in my bedroom thanks to Hubbo. And it is providing tons of escape for me. I'll post some pictures of my latest creations soon.

6. Son#2 is finding his way through summer school without his main, favorite teacher. It's taken some adjustment time but there is hope it's working out and he's at least staying clothed. Always a plus.

7. The newest puppy is growing like a weed and very much a positive influence on puppy#1. She is coming out of her shell, active all the time and really seems happy. She now explores the house, plays with puppy#2 and is eating/drinking more than just at night. The boys seem to enjoy the interaction with them both now too. Yay!

8. I'm thankful the weather hasn't been too bad so far (again, knock on wood). It's hot, and even somewhat humid, but we've had many bouts of rain and the cloud cover is ALWAYS welcome by me. I'm still nervous about withering away in July/August, but trying to stay in the moment of June being tolerable. Summer isn't my strongest time.

9. We're finally all caught up on NCIS. Since episode 1 of season 1 to the finale earlier this month. We're DONE! Now on to NCIS LA!

10. I'm also very thankful for absolute quiet. When I see it again, I will recognize it and embrace it with a much missed hug.

Several Things Friday

2010-04-16T10:01:00.001-07:00

What a crazy, fast week it's been. It started last Friday when son#2 needed to be picked up early from having meltdowns which we later found was due to allergy issues. He has since been home every day at some early stage having to be picked up from school or never having gone at all. It's all snowballed and it seems with the moon phases the past few weeks the kids decided to pounce on us all at once. But today the clouds have parted so I'll share some of the stuff that's been going on.

** Son#1 has been able to stay up later than "the brothers" since he IS older. But because it's sporadic and the days aren't set, he's using different ploys every night to try and get his way with staying up late most nights now. Partly because of his age, throw in some of the Autism and then all the sudden it's a fight every single night to stay up late. His reasoning and argument is he was able to the night before so every night should be the same. I think we're on our way to setting up a schedule of which nights a week that includes. I'm just getting over the shock that we're arguing about *this*. Will there ever be a time we aren't arguing about every little thing?

** Son#1 got in trouble sort of, the other night when we heard squealing to come out in the living room and see he was chasing the brothers and I could smell an air freshner EVERYWHERE.
After watching Shrek the Third, son#1 had read on the bottle (after getting it out of the hall closet) that it said Love Potion and so he thought he'd make the brothers fall in love if he sprayed them with it. There were quite a few showers that night. I don't know if I can even stomach using the rest of the bottle. Did I mention he ALSO sprayed it in his mouth & son#3's? Luckly there was no poisonous stuff in it. They didn't like it--which may have taught them a lesson all by itself.

** This weather is killing us with the confusion. It's a tad too humid and warm lately to use just fans at night, but then the A/C means we're too cool and runny noses by the end of the night. What gives Mother Nature!? Crap or get off the pot lady! It's either spring or summer....make up your muddled mind & let me know ASAP.

** Son #2 has been home so much he's bored, and therefore exploring a tad more than normal. I'm fighting frustration and wanting to watch those nature video's where the mother's eat their young, and he's having a grand time. This week it's been trash bags from out of the box....they make great parachutes to snap around. And knives all out of the knife block we've had since before he was born, all laid out in a line on the counter top. Oh and scissors. I half expect to walk into his bedroom one day and he'll have found my pocketknife I keep in my purse, cleaning his nails. That kid. If there's danger, he seeks it, finds it, shakes it's hand and invites it home for a meal.

** Having son#2 home is a little taste of summer for me. It's rather scary since this year has brought so many changes that summer is bound to be even more difficult than normal.
Son#3 doesn't take naps anymore so I get to listen to his chatter or fights with son#1 on a constant basis. And without him in summer school, he'll be sure to get bored & cranky much quicker during the daytime.
Son#2 still being in the naked phase makes it difficult for much outside play. Either I would have to lock him out or us out. Whichever way makes it complicated to know what's going on inside, my spidey sense doesn't tingle through brick walls very well. One month of school left, I just hope son#2 can stay at school most days so I can get the preparation done/ready for summer before it gets here.

** Son#3 has quite a mind of his own lately about long pants and short pants, as he calls them. Apparently at school his teacher is asking them to line up according to different things each day---like those with white on can come up to the head of the line etc. He has wanted to wear pants & cried every day this week and each day has been 80 degrees. Today he's home & outside...in jeans. But he was thrilled to be the line leader.

** Son#1 has decided he need a birthday recorder for his present today. Took awhile to figure out, he's wanting a cassette recorder to talk into and then rewind and listen to himself. Apparently he saw one of these ancient relics at school from one of his teachers. He has a little baby recording toy he carries around the house and loves to use when his brothers cry or I yell someone. LOVES to play that back. Fun. Where on earth I'll get one of these is beyond me. I don't have time to order. He has a funny thing about if he didn't pick the present, he doesn't want it. Like he received a birthday card *and five dollars* this week from Mr. Johnny his janitor from his elementary school. He and Mr. Johnny were close & he's been so sweet over the years and kept in touch well this year. But because it didn't come ON his birthday, son#1 asked me to write Mr. Johnny back and tell him it wasn't his birthday yet. It's a control thing. We're working on how impolite it is to tell someone who gives you a birthday gift or any OTHER gift that you didn't ask for it so you don't want it. Work in progress.

** Son#1 also has all A's and one B at the 12 week mark. I'm very pleased he brought up his B in math to an A because I personally haven't seen an A in math since I think I was his age.
His B is still in PE, and I plan to motivate him to participate more to get his grade up. Maybe Lego Indiana Jones for his DS will spur him on.

** One of things that you may not realize or think about with Autism is everyday small things. One of the reasons son#2 having to come home is because he can't/doesn't know how to blow his nose. If he could get some of the congestion OUT, he'd be better off, would be able to breathe and eat at the same time and would not be as frustrated I think. Son#1 sort of gets the idea but there's just something about the actual act they can not master. In turn, they sneeze a lot. And it ain't pretty. But something simple we all take for granted makes our lives complicated sometimes. And son#2 is WAY past the size and age of holding him down like a baby to suction the boogies out. It just makes it interesting. If nothing else, it's ALWAYS interesting here.

Ten Tuesday

2010-03-30T14:13:00.000-07:00

I lost internet early Tuesday morning and so last week's post went by the wayside.
So this week in honor of our 70+ degree spring temps this week, I thought I'd do an adjusted Ten Things list.

Ten Household Tasks I've Been Avoiding:

1. Washing curtains. Kitchen, living room and the shower curtain. So much effort with the arms above the head. Lazy much?

2. Digging out shorts & seeing if everyone has some that fit for the warm months ahead. Luckily with our boys, they are hot natured so t-shirts are used 9 out of 12 months of the year and out already.

3. Dusting---I have a lot of things higher up at my house so dust isn't as readily seen. Out of sight out of mind right??

4. The garage. Need I say more?

5. Do the flower pots/beds count?

6. Little repairs---door hinges, fence holes, kitchen cabinet locks.

7. Clean the carpets/rugs. *sigh* This has been put WAAAAYYY off.

8. Some space issues with where things need to be moved to be more convenient since we STILL haven't found a house. Being that it's 2 yrs this May we've been looking, I might as well get a move on this.

9. I bought some dishes at a store that was going out of business & I *was* waiting until we moved to get them out. New house, new dishes and all that. But I felt spring was a good excuse. We had Fiestaware when we got married and I just can't take how heavy they are anymore. I'm over it.

10. Cleaning out the hall closet with all the games, sheets & diapers. Eclectic assortment no?

Spring Break 4-5-6

2010-03-21T09:15:00.000-07:00

Whew!! I made it! We all survived, everyone is alive and no worse for wear. Just a few meltdowns by son#2 and none he didn't come out of in an hour or less.

Wednesday night I went to see Alice in Wonderland as a reward for making it halfway through Spring Break. It was 3D. While it may be the last movie I see 3D, it was fantastic! I was never into Alice as a child, I was too busy reading Nancy Drew, The Bobbsie Twins and Trixie Belding. But I loved the movie---it had a wonderful cast and just great graphics. For me it was Charlie and the Chocolate Factory meets Lord of the Rings. But I wouldn't take small children--little too much anger in parts, or at least I heard some kids cry.

Thursday my mom and aunt came to pick up son#1. He was going on his first away from home sleep-over to her house an hour away for three days. He was very excited and had been making lists of stuff to take with him. He got ten minutes down the road and came back to beg me to go with him. I explained over and over that I couldn't go since I had the brothers to take care of. He came up with everyone under the sun that could spend their Spring Break doing that. He tried going again. Thirty minutes later he was back crying. I made him take his bags inside and unpack them after apologizing to Nana and my aunt for driving an hour over here to get him. Maybe this summer or Fall Break he'll be mature enough. He's just not quite there yet.

Spring Break=no bra for most of the week. Bonus!

Now let's pray all these 8 inches of snow we got yesterday and today, doesn't keep us from heading back to school tomorrow.

Spring Break--Days 1-2-3

2010-03-16T08:34:00.000-07:00

Dear Diary ~

After a gloriously indulgent weekend of good food, good girly things like mani/pedis and family stuff totally has made the transition into Spring Break a breeze so far. (knock on wood)**I shouldn't have ever said this "outloud"--after typing it, son#2 had a meltdown because lunch was an hour late due to an important phone call. Now today is very unpredictable with son#2.**

Yesterday's weather was fantastic, not too cold, not too hot & not so sunny as to give me a migraine. We were out for 2 hrs, a record for me I think. Then we topped it off with ice cream--could Spring Break start off any better I ask you?

And my head cold is almost gone and completely manageable. Hallelujah!!

My sanity saver for the win is my iTouch and podcasts/library books to listen to. The radio stations without commercials alone make this such a treasure. Any type you can imagine! I just finished the book "Kabul Beauty School" by Deborah Rodriguiz which is based on a true story. It was fascinating read by the narrator. I think that always helps. But it's so fun to listen while doing chores I hate or cooking dinner to drone out the kid shows and arguments. I like the feeling of accomplishing two things at once too, but maybe that's just me.
My next book is "Pieces of My Heart by Robert Wagner--his autobiography. It's good so far and he reads it.

More later, gotta go take some heartburn meds & run to the library when Hubbo gets home to rescue/save/tag in for me.

Mentally Retarded

2010-03-11T09:26:00.001-08:00

This is a ongoing debate across the country, state-by-state as well.
A friend asked me recently how I felt about it since at least one of my sons has this label in his school records. And I've found government agencies love to use this as an umbrella term for many different illness or diseases. I had to take some time and think about it, but this is my take on the whole thing--today.

To be honest, I hadn't heard about this until my friend pointed out the stories. And truth be told, I will use the word on occasion without thinking in a sentence like this: "I can't believe that person just pulled out in front of all those cars--that's retarded." I can't think of the last time I called someone retarded. Even when they ARE, I usually say "slow".
If I find myself having said the word, I immediately feel guilty now. My kids have to have certain labels in their files for some assistance we get through school and the first day I saw son#2's as MR, it staggered me. I NEVER thought of him as mentally retarded. He knows what I am saying, he is aware of so much---retarded? But I realize now it's an IQ level standing. If your IQ falls below a certain number, they label you MR. Sad but true that it's not based on skills. /shrug

I don't find too much offense in the word itself just in the way it might be used, as in if you're calling my kid a retard or retarded, I might find we don't agree and I want to punch you in the nose.
But there is obviously still a level of retardation out there in the world. To be frank, my dad grew using the N word and not in the way it's used today. More in the way of identifying someone's work ethic/color of their skin.
He had to learn it wasn't acceptable now a days and meant something different to different generations.
I think the same can be said of the word retarded. We've grown, evolved as a nation...let's hope we can all find a more precise word to label someone or describe them in this day and age.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-03-09T09:31:00.000-08:00

1. Tomorrow my "baby" turns four years old! How is this possible when I still look like I just had him?

2. Son#1 is growing up and I'm thankful that he still likes me. Today. He wants to go spend Spring Break with Nana. We'll see. I don't know who would get bored to death first, him with no internet access or her with all his Star Wars and YouTube playlists ramblings.

3. I got to meet a friend from college at the airport Sunday. We haven't seen each other in 14 years!! We crammed more hen clucking in that 2 hours than should be humanly possible. The people around us were so distracting to me. Rather interesting sorts at the Starbucks airport. I almost threw up on the way back to my car. I took the shuttle and some insane tan skinned man made so many twists and turns at an ungodly speed my equilibrium could not keep up. But it was worth it Lisa!!!!

4. Son#2 is having a good few weeks of school. We'll see what Spring Break holds--what's that they say? Don't borrow worry? One minute/hour/day at a time.

5. I have a new humidifier and with my recent head cold, I'm in love with it. It's small, ultra-quiet and no filters to clean. It uses a water bottle!!

6. I'm thankful that this is the final season of LOST. I think the first rule of LOST fan club should be, don't talk about LOST. Just let it unfold and be surprised like the rest of us.

7. The weather this week and weekend were temps in the high 60's. Thank ya Jesus! But what's up with the birds waking up so early now? Do they possibly know it's Daylight Savings Time?

8. I'm thankful that someone is starting his trial tomorrow that ripped off $35,000 from my uncle who may die in the next three days. I'm hoping for the guilty verdict.

9. Thank you to whoever invented the Vicks nose inhaler. My kids call it my nose chapstick.

10. And lastly, I'm very happy my family made a trip with all of us to Wal-Mart this weekend. Rare thing for all of us. Son#2 pushed the cart, son#3 got to walk not ride, and son#1 tried not to walk into people while playing with my iTouch. It did remind me why I go to the grocery store by myself.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-03-02T11:29:00.000-08:00

1. I just took son#3 to the doctor and it's just a virus. I have pneumonia phobia. He has a runny nose, wet cough, tearing eyes and small fever at night. His appetite isn't normal and he fell asleep in the floor this afternoon after lunch. Not the usual energy dynamite he usually is. I'm happy he's not contagious and that it'll run it's course with some Mucinex to push it on it's way.

2. I love Bugles!! They are a blast from the past, have quite the crunch and a unique taste. Almost like a tall, skinny Corn Nut. What's not to like? Unless you're my college roomate who HATED my Corn Nut fetish. She said they smelled like dog food. Just means more for me!

3. I went to see the movie Valentines Day this weekend and LOVED LOVED LOVED it!! In case you missed it, it was good--go see it.

4.Time for mushy stuff. Isn't it great when you find a very fun, cool friend God places in your life? And even cooler when she turns out to have so much in common with you? You can jump right into the meaty talks about life, love and family. God seems to know what he's doing---imagine that.

5. My mom just left from a 2 day visit and the kids and I really enjoyed her time here. I'm VERY thankful the kids have at least one grandparent that is close-by and loves to play with them.

6. It's been fun introducing son#1 to the old school arcade games. He's pretty good, to be expected from this generation I guess. Brings back lots of memories of my Atari and hours of playing Pac Man with my dad.

7. I'm thankful for a husband that worked his cute little tushy off Sunday doing ALL the laundry, ALL the dishes and picked up the house. What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man! I'm also thankful he's figured out his place. Ooops did I say that out loud?! What I meant was that his place is beside me. (Holding the vacuum.)

8. I've broken an addiction this year, it's best I've fessed up to it. I love the time I've gained for Mon-Wed nights. Please refrain from throwing anything that stains. I'm off the show American Idol. For some reason, I had no desire to watch AI this season. I could care less about the horrendous try-outs, the sob story pieces, criminal backgrounds and the not quite good-enough singers. As I heard somewhere else, this isn't Make-A-Wish. Every person has a sob story somewhere in their life. All I can figure is my patience is shot for our society complex that makes people feel they are owed something or entitled anything, especially to this thing called fame. No you are not. So you can sing or have a talent. Got news for ya, we all have talent somewhere in us. But I don't think if some guy in Wisconsin is good with carpentry tools that we owe him 15 minutes of TV time and a contract with This Old House just because he stood in a long line all day or because his buddies told him he's got skills.
Wow, did you see that? Someone threw some box out there for me to fall onto. It says SOAP on it. Hmmmm I'll have to watch out for those from now on.

9. Mr. Coffee came to live at our house the day we got home from our honeymoon. He hadn't failed me in 12 and half years, until Sunday. I was SO sad. I went to Wal-Mart thinking a new coffee maker can't be hard to find and ended up having a meltdown probably needing one of my sons pills if truth be told. I finally made it through the process which seemed to take as long as those rose ceremonies on TV. I still feel old because I don't think those things are made as well as they used to be. They just seem flimsy and clumsy. Why can't they just have my same one I had? Is that too much to ask?! I kept Mr. Original Coffee just in case it was a one off. I'm not sure he's realized that he's not top dog anymore. *sniff

10. And I'm thankful for catalogs/magazines. I love them. I get an extra jolt when I get the mail and it's not all junk and bills---a catalog can make that all better. It maybe an unhealthy obsession if you look around my house at how many containers are hiding them, but I can't help it-- I luuuuv them. How then I ask you could I throw them away!?

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-02-23T07:30:00.000-08:00

1. I'm thankful for Colby-Jack round cheese slices from the deli. Sorry, weak isn't it? But it's true-- I'm addicted. I can't stop myself...they call to me from the drawer in the fridge every day all day. Is there a help group for cheese addiction? You may see me on that A&E show Intervention sometime soon.

2. I got to see some wonderful family members Saturday that were in town from Houston. A brand new baby, a new boyfriend and husband I hadn't met. All were just great and we're blessed to have them all in our family. Hi Lindsay!!

3. Son#1's principal died Sunday and yesterday when he was home from school with a headache, son#1 took the news well. Below I'll post a picture of his idea of a good-bye to him. For the record, he gets the word fail from Star Wars games I think.

4. I'm truly happy and thankful all my plates are spinning together this week. None are threatening to fall and that can't be said every week. It's a good thing as Martha says.

5. I got to talk to some college friends I hadn't talked to in awhile and it was nice to touch base and really nice to find Julie Hall again. Sometimes the me before 1997 is forgotten. Always nice to see that part of me again.

6. Son#1 received a wonderful quilt in the mail this week! Ms. Yvonne Hubbo's step-mother HAND-QUILTED him a Star Wars quilt!!! Again, picture below--it doesn't even begin to do this beast justice! Did I mention it's queen sized? Ms. Yvonne is quite the Energizer Bunny addition to our family.

7. I got the princess dog Chloe groomed Saturday while we went to see my mother for the day. She came back softer than mink! And she found her brave inner dog. It's SO wonderfully heartwarming to see her jumping around and happier not to mention more relaxed. She isn't completely relaxed at all times, but she's getting there. The princess goes for surgery Thursday so let's hope she keeps that spark afterwards.

8. We had a meeting at son#3's school. He's doing SO well and they think he's just as happy & fun as we do. That's always nice. We're so thankful for his progress and what a well adjusted kid he is. A true bright spot in my day,

9. This week my iTouch is saving my brain cells. The radio stations, podcasts, downloaded books from the library, and music. I may nominate it for the Nobel Peace Prize for next year.

10. Bare Minerals make up had such success with the first eye color for Autism-Puzzle- ($25,000 success) that they are launching another in March of this year called Cherish! I'm very thankful to Leslie Blodgett and her team at BE for making different causes including Autism, a priority. The color is shown here on the side profile & it will be available online or at boutiques March 11.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-02-16T13:18:00.000-08:00

1. I had a wonderful week last week of no kids home from school and no holidays. Everyone went to work and school every day and I got a lot accomplished. I also smiled a lot in my quiet house. Alone time is precious and I don't take it for granted very often. Especially in the bathroom.

2. February 12th was the 4 year anniversary that my father died. I'm relieved to say it hurts less. Still plenty of painful MOMENTS, but the experience itself in daily living has lessened considerably. People always tell you that crap and there are even times you yourself will say it to people. Sometimes speaking from experience of going through it, and sometimes speaking from watching someone else deal. I'm happy to say it's not just a bunch of hooie, it IS true--time will heal your wounds. They don't ever close completely but you will heal through it to a livable functioning place.

3. I'm thankful my family made it through the holiday parts of this month *Hubbo's birthday is the 6th* without ANYONE being sick. It's a MIRACLE! Let's put it this way, I can not remember the last time in February we didn't have a member of the family sick or all of us ill on Valentines day, Super Bowl Sunday or Hubbo's birthday.

4. Valentines day may have been spent with my children, but my husband waited on me like a Queen. That beats out candy any day. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN!!!!!!!!

5. I found a new funny British show I love--The Good Life for you in the UK and The Good Neighbors for us Yanks. I watched it all in a 3 day time span from the first episode to the very last one--a Royal Command Performance in front of the Queen. Always good to find a new show I like. *This is my list remember? Not yours, so if you don't like it, get it or care, then kiss my grits!*

6. Son#2 got sent home today for trying to eat his mashed potatoes with his hands in the cafeteria. Well, okay, really it was because he got mad he wasn't allowed to and it escalated from there to the Hannibal Lecter chair. *sigh* At least I got the house cleaned & laundry started before he got here. He's fine now, but really---who doesn't have that urge sometimes? Spoil sports.

7. Westminster Dog Show was on last night and tonight--I LOVE watching! And this year I am SO thankful to finally have my very own dog to watch with.

8. I got my hair all chopped off. It's short people. I didn't even get that much cut off, I was telling her to even up my layers. Somehow I'm in a short bob cut again. Oh well---time to get out the barrettes and big hoop earrings I guess.

9. I got two round-about compliments last week. One was from a man that drives my son's bus. He said I didn't look 35 years old, I looked much younger. Lord, bless him with keeping his hair and his own teeth as he ages--Amen.
And the other was from a girl at scrapbooking. A new girl. She thought I'd had eyelash implants! FOR REAL! Someone does that to another person on purpose? Can you imagine what you'd look like?! All swollen up and bruised the next day? I told her truthfully, it's not the first time I'd been asked that but thank you. I sure don't think they're what they used to be, but hey, evidently some poor rich women are running around with naked eyes needing implants. Who knew?

10. And I'm most thankful for Doan's Back Pills. Those suckers WORK.

Ten Things Tuesday

2010-02-09T14:04:00.000-08:00

I know--the word slacker comes to mind when you think of my blog. I feel like I have so much to say, there's no way it would all fit, so another week goes by without blogging. But today, my friend Michelle (Hi Michelle!!!) linked my Ten Things in her blog and THAT motivated me not to wait another cotton pickin minute, I had to just go BLOG!!!!!!!!!!!
SO here it is, it's been forever since I've done one---Ten Things Tuesday--hold your applause till the end.

1. I'll work my way backwards so to speak. Last night I attended Bunko. Now I seem to always say, "I'm SO thankful for the Bunko girls. I had so much fun." But I never really get into WHY they make me feel good, so let me try for the words.
My Bunko group has evolved over the years of living in Oklahoma to include many wonderful Christian women who have stunning faith in God. There are so many encouraging, accepting women that I can't possibly name them by name but each brings me (selfish much?) acceptance of my situation and doesn't judge. Each one takes me for who I am, accepts it's all I CAN be in that moment, and hasn't ever tried to change me. We laugh, we joke, we cry, we help build each other up with encouragement, words of wisdom and efforts of praise & acknowledgment. Now that isn't to say we don't get really, really silly. Snort, tell rude jokes about each other and just let our hair down.
I truly believe God sent me each group I've played with, in times when I need their spiritual gifts at that time in my life. Who knew what a blessing food, dice and a bunch of clucking women could be to each other. God made us so different from man, and to celebrate, accept and just plain revel in our similarities, is one of my most favorite things to do & is truly something I'm thankful for. Oh and the gooood food too.

2. Son#2's unknown cause tantrums are less this week. They were getting to where we thought we might have to change the dose of meds again. He's at least letting us sleep more at night/morning. And being sent home from school less. On one of his happy days, he took his scarf of stretchy nylon he got for Christmas from my sister-in-law, and snapped the assistant principal on the butt with it as she exited his class.

3. I am thankful for a great learning lecture the other night at my sons school about what happens when they turn 18 yrs old and the options in the community available to them for work, school and programs to help them. It was enlightening, interesting and made me understand why God brought Hubbo and I to Oklahoma. Apparently, Oklahoma is the top state in the nation for employment programs for disabled adults over the age of 18. And in the top three or five states in the country for transitioning kids to adulthood and helping them live by themselves.
Very encouraging! Oh and did I mention when I signed in, the older lady said, "Oh your Carson's mother---he's quite a boob man!" The pride swells within me.

4. We have had tons of winter weather since December, and we're due for more Thursday, but no problems with power going out or our car sliding off the road. Let's it keep it that way God!!

5. I got Hubbo this for his birthday, and he LOVES it! http://www.bbcamericashop.com/house-and-home/doctor-who-tardis-4-port-usb-hub-14827.html
It's a geeky tv show thing but when I can find a present for him he wants, it's a win--trust me. The man is harder to buy for than the average male. He doesn't wear aftershave, cologne or ties. Hubbo once kept a gift card for 2 yrs. before he used it. He's had the same wallet for years and I bought him a watch last year and I recently found it in his bag he carries to work. Men.

6. I LOOOOOOOOOOOOVE Pita chips! Stacy's Simply Naked Nothing But Sea Salt Pita Chips. I made some spinach dip for the Super Bowl for myself to accompany the Pita chips. It was so good, I don't even want to describe it because I'm afraid you'll go buy them all up for yourself.

7. My laundry is caught up for two weeks now. 'Nuff said. I feel my chest puffing up a little.

8. We're having pizza tonight and last night was Bunko so I didn't cook either--BONUS!

9. I got a knitting chair!! All for me and too narrow for just about anyone else's hiney in this house--what a shame huh?

10. I'm pleased my Son#1 has decided to let me be his mother again. He informed me the other day he was very sorry I was yelling and frustrated at the brothers, but maybe that meant I shouldn't be a mother if I get frustrated. He thought Mrs. Turner their substitute teacher would make a great mother because she doesn't seem to get frustrated. I picture her with long hair and fairly young with no children of her own, don't you? I tried to explain how EVERYONE gets frustrated and pointed out how every morning he bites my head off when I've done nothing to him but say good morning. But he has finally come around that I should stay and be HIS mother. But that maybe the brothers ought to go live somewhere else forever. Ahh the love.

God Lives Under the Bed

2010-02-05T08:12:00.000-08:00

I envy Kevin. My brother, Kevin, thinks God lives under his bed. At least that's what I heard him say one night.

He was praying out loud in his dark bedroom, and I stopped to listen, 'Are you there, God?' he said. 'Where are you? Oh, I see. Under the bed...'

I giggled softly and tiptoed off to my own room. Kevin's unique perspectives are often a source of amusement. But that night something else lingered long after the humor. I realized for the first time the very different world Kevin lives in.

He was born 30 years ago, mentally disabled as a result of difficulties during labor. Apart from his size (he's 6-foot-2), there are few ways in which he is an adult.

He reasons and communicates with the capabilities of a 7-year-old, and he always will. He will probably always believe that God lives under his bed, that Santa Claus is the one who fills the space under our tree every Christmas and that airplanes stay up in the sky because angels carry them.

I remember wondering if Kevin realizes he is different. Is he ever dissatisfied with his monotonous life?

Up before dawn each day, off to work at a workshop for the disabled, home to walk our cocker spaniel, return to eat his favorite macaroni-and-cheese for dinner, and later to bed.

The only variation in the entire scheme is laundry, when he hovers excitedly over the washing machine like a mother with her newborn child.

He does not seem dissatisfied.

He lopes out to the bus every morning at 7:05, eager for a day of simple work.

He wrings his hands excitedly while the water boils on the stove before dinner, and he stays up late twice a week to gather our dirty laundry for his next day's laundry chores.

And Saturdays - oh, the bliss of Saturdays! That's the day my Dad takes Kevin to the airport to have a soft drink, watch the planes land, and speculate loudly on the destination of each passenger inside. 'That one's goin' to Chi-car-go! ' Kevin shouts as he claps his hands.

His anticipation is so great he can hardly sleep on Friday nights.

And so goes his world of daily rituals and weekend field trips..

He doesn't know what it means to be discontent.

His life is simple.

He will never know the entanglements of wealth of power, and he does not care what brand of clothing he wears or what kind of food he eats. His needs have always been met, and he never worries that one day they may not be.

His hands are diligent. Kevin is never so happy as when he is working. When he unloads the dishwasher or vacuums the carpet, his heart is completely in it.

He does not shrink from a job when it is begun, and he does not leave a job until it is finished. But when his tasks are done, Kevin knows how to relax.

He is not obsessed with his work or the work of others. His heart is pure.

He still believes everyone tells the truth, promises must be kept, and when you are wrong, you apologize instead of argue.

Free from pride and unconcerned with appearances, Kevin is not afraid to cry when he is hurt, angry or sorry. He is always transparent, always sincere. And he trusts God.

Not confined by intellectual reasoning, when he comes to Christ, he comes as a child. Kevin seems to know God - to really be friends with Him in a way that is difficult for an 'educated' person to grasp. God seems like his closest companion.

In my moments of doubt and frustrations with my Christianity, I envy the security Kevin has in his simple faith.

It is then that I am most willing to admit that he has some divine knowledge that rises above my mortal questions.

It is then I realize that perhaps he is not the one with the handicap. I am. My obligations, my fear, my pride, my circumstances - they all become disabilities when I do not trust them to God's care.

Who knows if Kevin comprehends things I can never learn? After all, he has spent his whole life in that kind of innocence, praying after dark and soaking up the goodness and love of God.

And one day, when the mysteries of heaven are opened, and we are all amazed at how close God really is to our hearts, I'll realize that God heard the simple prayers of a boy who believed that God lived under his bed.

Kevin won't be surprised at all!

Chloe

2010-01-08T17:40:00.000-08:00

I'd like you to meet the newest addition to our family--Chloe.
She’s a poodle and sort of rescue situation. According the breeder she is a year old. I saw an ad in the local paper's website of free poodles. I knew I wanted a poodle because I'd had one before, they are smart, no shedding, long life span and good with children. And I wanted a non-puppy but not a dog too far down the path of life. In our house, I don't have time to potty train anyone else or deal with their baby behavior. I wanted a small dog yet not a toy---too much action at my house for any tiny animals. Chloe had only been kept in a crate her whole life and only seen one human, the breeder. Breeder lady got too old to keep up with them all so she started giving them away & so a friend and I went to check her out Dec 20th. She was SO timid. Had NEVER been outside-EVER. The breeder kept food out till 3pm and then she took the food away & the dog only ate in the crate. This was her first car ride, first other experience with humans and first grooming. She was under the couch when we got there. It took us 30 min before any of us found her. So she is SUPER timid right now but lets us hold her & pet her. We’re trying not to overwhelm her. But she’s warming to us. She doesn’t bark or growl, she’s just not sure. Her whole world has been turned upside down.

Dec 22-
Chloe made it to the vet and had an ear infection and worms. She took her medicine like a trooper and was perking up after a day or so on it. She got several shots too. After a call to the breeder, I found she is a year or so old. She was pretty sure her books had her birthday as Sept 6th. The vet and I are guess 2008 since she has all her adult teeth. Chloe weighs 6.2 lbs.

De 25-Jan3
She did great in the snow--you'd have thought having her world turned upside down, she'd be scared of 8 inches of snow, but she was a bounding trooper.
Chloe has been timid still at times, trembling but never shying away from us as if she's scared of us. She was never hit, but not being socialized or around children before, well our house is like jumping in feet first with noise.
She's also growled a couple of times at Hubbo coming in the room when she is laying next to me. At least she's made a noise finally! Chloe did lick my hand last weekend. Still only eating and drinking at night.

Jan 8-
Still can't really walk on the kitchen floor. I've read they have to master that if they've lived in a crate. But still, not ONE accident since she came to live with us. Chloe didn't eat last night but I think it's because I left her coat on for warmth. She didn't really know how to come back inside in it. Chloe did make some progress today with some firsts. She took food from my hand for the first time. So far she hadn't even accepted a treat from me. And she full out barked at Hubbo! We laughed, at least she has a voice in there! She also opened her body up while sleeping. She's been a tense, tight circle when sleeping, now she laid more on her back so I could rub her tummy. She's so soft like velvet!

I'm sure many will wonder why on earth I'd think a dog in our house wouldn't just create more chaos.
But, it's not only what my heart wanted--this is the longest I'd been without a dog in my life, but I wanted the boys to learn to live with and respect another living thing. I've learned in the few weeks we've had her that her special situation is only going to take love, patience and kindness. We happen to do those things pretty well around here.

Lately

2009-12-15T05:11:00.000-08:00

Well I am ahead of the curve on Christmas. I even feel okay saying that out loud. THAT is how close I am to DONE people! I've been busy ever since Thanksgiving like most of us. I've been decorating, crafting, baking up a storm and knitting.

The kids are well. Some runny noses here and there but no fevers & no missed school. Son#2 is missing on school today because he went into the surgery center for Dr. E to repair his broken front tooth. He reinforced it this time which is probably best, and he filled two tiny cavities, cleaned & flossed his teeth for him. Hubbo took him in by himself while I stayed here getting #1 & #3 on the bus for school. All in all it went well. The worst part is usually getting son#2 into the OR and waking up. This time we had a new anesthesiologist and he thought he'd put all 139lbs of son#2 on a stool, put the mask on him and THEN move him to the OR table. Yeah right. Hubbo nixed that real quick.

Then the wake up time isn't the best. Most people don't really feel great coming out of the "fog", but kids seem to react more loudly. Of course, being non-verbal son#2 doesn't yell at us like son#1, but he DOES love to bellow like a bull moose right in your face with his surgery breath. And rip out IV's or pulse ox plugs. His poor lips are always cracked open and rough/dry while his voice is raspy from the tube down his nose and throat. All in all he sleeps it off for awhile and then he's back looking for the gravy train.

I thought I'd include some of my latest creations that have gotten me in the holiday spirit of giving this year.

Progress

2009-11-16T13:49:00.001-08:00

Well it's been awhile-- hush about it. I've seriously enjoyed the quiet time at my house in the mornings M-Th with all three kids gone at school.
So as a slow progression back into the blogging world, I give you some funny tidbits of life around here lately. I hope to be back in the swing soon. Just don't push me or I'll go back to the couch & my bon bons.

Number one son is adjusting slower than I anticipated to the middle school grind. All the "new's" paired with hormones have him a tad grumpy 90% of the time.
His homework the other night was done with Hubbo, and these were his answers, always good for a laugh.

Instructions:
Tell why you would or would not like to ride in each vehicle listed below.

1. Airplane: I don't like to leave Oklahoma.

2. Ferry: I don't like crossing the river,

3. Taxi: I don't like riding with strangers.

4. Subway: I don't like being underground.

5. Motorcycle: They're too noisy.

Instructions: Suppose you worked in a bicycle shop. What might you say to someone to get them to buy a bike?

It costs $.88. It's good for riding it to school.

Today son#1 came home today telling me that Mrs. Fowlers at school is coming to Pryor with us next week for Thanksgiving. Surprise Aunt Tala! Here is our conversation:

Me; Well honey, Mrs. Fowlers probably has her own family she wants to spend Thanksgiving with. That's what most people do, spend it with their own family.

son#1: Well, not this year. She's coming to Pryor for the very first time. She'll just have to bring her parents. I think they'll like Pryor too.

(Now, I'll stop right here to tell you, Mrs. Fowlers has some lighter tones of gray in her hair...)

me: Hmmm, well have you asked her about this yet? Invited her?

son#1: No, but she'll come, she likes me.

me: You have the biggest heart of any kid I know.

son#1: Yeah I know. It's red & down in my stomach.

me: Your heart is in your stomach?

son#1: Yeah, I hide it there so no one steals it.

me: Sounds like a good place. I'll remind you of this conversation when you're dating.

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-09-22T06:59:00.000-07:00

Things I'm thankful for today...

1. Son#3 started school today. He'll go M-Thurs 8:30am-noon. It's exciting but a new experience for us both.

2.Time to myself, to do what I want, watch what I want, when I want, without a running commentary. I might actually eat real food today too!

3. Cooler temps--so cool that my kids wore jackets this morning to school. YAY FALL! Bring it on!!!

4. Football season again. It's taken almost 4 years for me to be able to watch a game and enjoy it again or even care too much. My dad and I used to watch the Dallas Cowboys together since I was little. And after he died, it just wasn't the same. It was too painful to watch thinking of all the conversations I would have been having with him. It's a little easier this year.

5. I got a lot accomplished yesterday, meetings, errands, forms filled out...good feeling marking things off the eternal TO DO list in your head.

6. I'm ahead of the game by already having my nephews birthday present ready to send out.

7. TV shows are back! I'm looking forward to or have already enjoyed Bones, Castle & NCIS Los Angleles!

8. Son#1 still thinks I'm cool after I ATTEMPTED to fixed some computer game cheat code for him. Daddy ended up really getting it to work, but I think son#1 telling Daddy, "Julie actually got it to work." was a compliment.

9.Son#1 has a new saying: "Etc., etc., etc. " When his dad asked him if he knew what that meant, he said "Blah, blah, blah." I think that's pretty accurate. It's now our new favorite saying.

10. Did I mention time completely alone in my own house???

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-09-01T07:52:00.000-07:00

Things I'm thankful for...

1. School--'nuff said!

2. Uplifting friends & the fun I've had with them eating, scrapbooking & going to the movies this week.

3. Getting closets organized. They can really slow you down in the mornings if they aren't.

4. Books & the escape they provide.

5. Netflix & the "Watch It Now" feature.

6. Answered prayers.

7. Getting caught up in my scrapbooks.

8. Paychecks

9. Food I don't cook or clean up.

10. My new haircut--even though I'm just now warming to it & don't think of it as different, everyone else seems to like it. That's a good feeling.

Great News!

2009-08-25T09:59:00.000-07:00

We received some terrific news today and although we felt we knew this all along in our hearts, it's wonderful to have confirmation to tamp down any doubts. Or doubters--and there are those that look at your with doubt in their eyes.

Son#3 was tested recently and shows NO signs of cognitive delays! This means there is no sign of Autism. The word they used was "average". I can live with average.

How the Summer Was Won

2009-08-22T13:19:00.000-07:00

For most people summer is something they look forward to & dream about the time spent away from home with their family in the warm sunshine. We're not most people.
I would venture to guess just about anyone reading this post has figured that out by now. Not only do I hate the heat, the sun gives me monstrous headaches and the kids never seem to have enough to keep them occupied. They really do miss school & the routine. Did I mention I hate the heat? Summer is my LEAST favorite time of year. So for all the times you're hearing friends and family lamenting about, "Where did the summer go?" I'm going to let you in on how we survived the summer around here & how happy we are it's over.

You'll notice I haven't blogged since the first week in June. Well, let's just say summer takes three of me and there's only just the one. I can't remember sitting down much of the summer actually. As my mother says it's a wonder I'm not super skinny. Summer school was wonderful & I enjoyed the break every morning with the two bigger boys gone from 8-noon. I actually got some things accomplished, cleaning the garage out and such. Don't be too impressed, it's really taken me 2 years. We even had almost 2 solid weeks of rain--I was in heaven! We played outside a lot of the first part of the month and the kids really enjoyed the beach ball, sprinkler, trampoline, swingset, sidewalk chalk and little baby pool to play cars/trains in. Around here with 100+% humidity, we don't get out much of July/August. It never seems to be worth the effort you put out for 10 minutes of feeling wiped out the rest of the day. Even the kids don't seem interested at all after 30 minutes. But we found plenty at the library and such to keep us busy inside the rest of the rainy month of June.

The kids had the first week of July off of school and Hubbo's father came to visit. We got to meet his new wife Ms. Yvonne. The kids loved the time with them & we got to get out and about as a family quite a bit. We went to the aquarium, which son #2 really seemed to enjoy. I think he would have stayed all day peering at the fish. Although the kids weren't as impressed with the shark feedings as we adults were, but then, we're taller. We also went to an animal sanctuary with tigers & lions. Hubbo and his dad did some of the feedings with frozen chicken legs. That was impressive and I took many pictures. The baby loved the petting zoo type part and was fearless around the llamas, geese, and goats especially. Son#1 said he could have done without the sanctuary for the following reasons: it smelled, flies, too hot...oh and the other flies. For July the heat really held itself at bay while our company was here and we did our fun things. The kids all enjoyed it and I am thrilled to report they were all very well behaved. We were impressed!

Son#1 loved VBS and found an older girl in Drama Time that he has a crush on. Boy it starts young! I finally got their picture & I think it'll make a nice scrapbook page to show him when he's 18. Son#1 also has started middle school and doesn't seem to impressed by it all. But that's Autism--resistance to change at it's best! We go this week to his open house where hopefully we will sort it all out with the teacher. He's having huge adjustments and many of them with getting up at 6:15am, bus leaving at 7am. Not to mention, new school, new teachers & new bus driver who is nowhere near the perfection of patience we reached in previous years. That's a lot to deal with for him. He'll probably start back wearing his medicine patches or a half of one, soon to help him cope with his anxiety about it all.

Son#2 is back on the old meds with no tics. The tic seemed to be from caffeine intake. Now that we monitor that, we've had no problems. Well except the eating/weight issue it causes, but we're working on that one. He had a good 9th birthday because we were able to find a replacement for a 2 year old singing pig he had that he wore out. It's very hard to find a non-speaking/non-traditional toy loving child, a birthday present. Much less more than one. The pig was a life saver and boy has he driven us crazy with it--a sure sign he loved it.

That leaves son#3 and boy has summer given him a big boost! First he had his 3 year check-up where the doctor informed us he was off the percentile chart for height and 98th% for weight. His hip/foot have straightened out a lot, although he'll have to start some PT soon to help keep him from walking on his tip toes. He's always done it for balance to counter the foot he drags. Sure doesn't slow him down though. And son#3 is talking in complete sentences now too! A sound close to Hubbo & I's heart although on a crazy day can drive me bonkers. But he's a huge help around here and is quite the happy boy 99% of the time. Who could ask for anything more? He keeps us all happy & laughing even when we're in the trenches.
We took him for evaluation to get placed in a pre-school program in the public school system here for this fall. With the brothers history, and him taking awhile to talk, we want to be sure we are proactive with his speech and give him some kids his own age to learn from. Ours not being the most typical household to learn in. Son#3 loved VBS with son#1. They both really enjoyed the stories of David and the other kids. And son#2 got plenty of time with daddy, his favorite playmate.

Well, that about does it. You're caught up on our goings-ons. I promise now that I have more time to myself with the kids in school, to blog more often. If you don't hear from me though, I'd start checking local bus stations & airports, I haven't had a vacation yet this year.

For Tala

2009-06-28T19:17:00.000-07:00

According to my Aunt Tala, I'm overdue for a blog post, so I'll just update a few things for you all.
Since school has been out, son#2 has been back to the old meds, and therefore has been able to return to summer school. His behavior is better & he is the old Carson we all know & love. However, he is back to being consumed with food 24/7. Such is life on this med. As long as he is distracted, he is less bothersome about it. But you're never quite prepared for a 112 lb. boy to be playing crouching tiger, hidden food on your kitchen counter top.

They are all enjoying the outdoors in the mornings when it's in the 90's and not hitting 100 degrees yet.
Son #1 is having fun only doing summer school two mornings a week and having a break from his brother's newest set of verbal annoyances. Yes we want him to talk, but it's sure coming at a high pierced price lately. heh
Son#2 is saying things that sound an awful lot like "I LOVELOVE YOU" over & over & over & over again. The entire ding dong day. It's sort of like when you pray for patience and the Lord answers by giving you things to practice being patient about.

Son#3 is thinking of potty training. He understands & embraces it all. Loves to yell through the house, "Pee-pee potty!" and then runs to the bathroom going through the whole routine including telling me to sit in the "chair"--the side of the tub, to observe. After leaving the bathroom he then proceeds to pee-pee in his pull-up. Soon we need to work on the pee-pee finding it's way into the potty.

We have enjoyed playdough, Legos, watercolor paints, growing a snake you put in water and playing baseball.
And in the afternoons while the baby sleeps, son#1 is at the computer working on his computer skills & BrainPopJr. Son#2 prefers to follow me around practicing the newest verbal sound at the loudest frequency possible. I think without my annual girl trip and time away from my family, I'm working on that above mentioned patience thingie.

I think it's safe to say the majority of parents love summer & enjoy the time with the kids home. I DO enjoy the less rigorous routine around here, but I have to say I work more than ever. Cooking three different meals a day for at least 4 different people, all the while being surrounded by my paparazzi. With the heat & energy that all takes, I find I have less energy to remove myself somewhere pleasant at the end of the evening to recharge my batteries. Summer's heat has never been my favorite & the boredom kids seem to suffer from doesn't place it close to my heart either. But we're hanging in there. If you don't hear from me in the next couple of weeks, you may find I've run off to escape somewhere MUCH, MUCH cooler. For now, I leave you with pictures of the boys enjoying themselves.

More Journal Thoughts From Jack

2009-05-28T08:41:00.000-07:00

Things here have been crazy the past month with son #2, and I don't want to get into it all just yet. I need some distance, plus it's not all over with. So in the meantime, in honor of the last day of school,and all the stuff son#1 is bringing home from his desk, let's all smile & give a chuckle to his journal entries. The literal mind of an 11 year old, sort of simplifies things for me & makes me feel better.

If I went to the jungle: I would see a snake. You can look but don't touch. The jungle is cool.

If I went to the beach: I would build a sand castle. I also would barry doritos in the sand. Then we play in the sand. Then when it is time to go I pick up the doritos.

My dentist trip: They gave me medicine. My tongue did not go numb (like Jar Jar did) then we went home.

My weekend: For dinner this Saturday was Munchies. For dinner this Sunday is Lays. (orange)
note: I eat those a little bit so I don't jump around. *Son#1 knows if he eats junk & jumps around a lot, he'll probably throw up.*

My weekend: Julie went to a hole tell. Matt stayed. She came home this Sunday. *I really hope the teacher doesn't think we were fighting.*

My Christmas Break: It is 2009. I played with Grayson. He was cool.

My Imperial Day: I played the Wii. Julie got a new van. It was cool. *don't ask what an Imperial day is, because I do not know, although I always lean towards Star Wars.*

My Martin Luther King Jr. Day: I visited Brain Pop for the movie. They won't let them eat the same Lays. So he had a dream. *this clarifies the fight of civil rights huh?*

My Presidents Day: I played on my Nintendo ds. Matt got the van. It felt better. * we tell them at the cars go to vehicle hospitals*

My weekend: Julie went back to scrapbooking to finish. She was back before dinner. I love her.

My Spring Break: We cleaned up for visitors. I showed them the Wii. I love them. *I think this was his uncle/aunt & cousins.*

My weekend: Julie hurt her leg after scrapbooking. It will feel better soon. Matt got me Munchies. caution: she hops on one leg as a bunny

My Easter day: We hunted for eggs inside. They have gummies. We ate them. *this one feels like it needs a Biblical, "And it was good." at the end doesn't it?*

My weekend: On Saturday we went to Big Lots. I got a Sprite bottle. We got more stuff at Big Lots.

My Mother's Day weekend: We went to the Autism run. I played on the trampoline. Then at Best Buy we got presents for Julie.

Memorial day weekend: Grayson and Carson went with Matt. I stayed with Julie. They got home.

And last night we had to pick up Hubbo from work, so we all piled in the tiny, red clown car since the van is still in the car hospital. These are the laugh out loud observations son#1 made on this trip. Amazing how they listen to every little thing even when you think they aren't.

First we passed the armory in town that is where the weekend reserve military people meet up. He yells out, "There's a civil war tank!" Hubbo & I both felt quite old & discussed how to our kids, WWII will seem like the Civil War did to us.

Then we come to a huge Bible college here in town called Rhema. Their auditorium is quite large & has a well lit digital moving sign out front. While waiting at a light in front of it, Jack asked if this was where American Idol was.

Then we discussing someone marrying someone else, and he pipes up and asks, "Marian? She's on Indiana Jones!"
me: "Not that Marian honey."

As we pull up to Charlie's Chicken, son#1 bursts out, "There's the red barn house with the chicken memorial!" * the rooster weather vane on the roof*
And finally as we're in line at the drive-thru, he asks me, "Maybe Harrison Ford is in that car in front of us."
me: "Why do you think that?"
son#1: "I noticed his hair.."

A BIG Ten Things Tuesday

2009-05-12T09:37:00.000-07:00

Being the last month of school, we've been more heavily involved in school things. Son #1 goes to middle school next year (6-7-8 grades) and son#2 is having issues staying at school
so I thought I'd just show you with some pictures what we've been up to.

1. Rainbow day at son#2's school. Each grade wears a certain color & the clear a parking lot while someone stands on the roof and takes a school picture.
2. Son #1's latest funny journal entries:

If I went to the desert, I would see : snakes. It is hot in the desert. I would see cacti.
The last time I cried was: Grayson ate my Lays. I got another one. That made me happy.
If I could build a robot: like Moby. I can install his speech function. He would say give me fifty dollars.
I smile (it said scream & he crossed it out & put smile) whenever I see: ants. They look for crumbs. They are cute.
A place that seems interesting is: New York. It has cities in it.
Right now something I really need is: a few bags of Lays. I need them because I'm keeping them. I eat them.
The telephone is an important invention because: you call someone far away. You can call your family. I call the police.
I'd like to invent a machine that: makes lightsabers. It has a red blade. I make it out of glass.
My favorite thing to talk about is: nothing. I don't have to talk. I have nothing to say.

3. Tuscany Brand Brushetta from Sam's. And Multi-Grain crackers from Sam's. Yummo!

4. My new gadget that has me eating A LOT of fresh pineapple!

5. Son#2 went to back to school today & hopefully when the baby naps, I'll get some time alone!

6. The month of May has tons of good movies coming out so Hubbo and I are on the path to see several this month starting with Star Trek. He went last night, and hopefully tonight I'll go.

7. Son#3 has enough hair that after he got an electric train stuck in his hair & we had to cut it out close the scalp, there's not even a hole in his mop of a head.

8. I plugged in a nightlight last week about the time that lightning struck closeby. It sparked, barely zapped my thumb but there was not ONE piece of glass found or metal from that bulb. Nothing but stink & black soot.

9. The local Autism walk was this past Saturday & we had a load of fun. For the first time all the Swaims got to participate. I was thrilled we could all be there! Even though dark weather was looming, we had a great turn out of a lot more people than usual. Possibly because they pushed it back a couple of weeks later this year. We had it at a new place too that I think was much more suited to the walk. Special thanks from the bottom of my heart to Carrie & her family, Tracey, Tamara and all of son#1's teachers/principal and administrators for showing up to support us all.
10. And last, yesterday was our field trip to son#1's school he'll attend next year--Middle school.
I had no idea I'd be so emotional over it. But seeing these boys I recognized from earlier years was just so overwhelming! They were so tall, most taller than me. And one greeted us at the door, showing his previous teacher that was with us, he had a moustache now. HA! We had a tour, lunch & got to meet a lot of the their teachers and kids he'll be with next year. It was a blast & I'm so happy I went. It's interesting to be an outsider watching the way a young person with Autism can communicate with another person on the spectrum. Or what they choose to communicate about. These kids were such a joy that I'm loosing my trepidation about son#1 moving on & growing up.

Ten Things Thursday

2009-05-07T07:02:00.000-07:00

1. I'm thankful that the week is almost over. Son#2 may go to school tomorrow so today sort of feels like Friday to me.

2. I'm thankful that now we KNOW what son#2 is like, completely off meds. It's been three years since we began that journey. But we're still going to try & find a new one to help him cope with his emotions.

3. I'm thrilled my whole family will be doing the Autism walk this Saturday!!

4. I'm very excited Mother's Day is Sunday. Bring on the indulgence! That's always fun & the kids are already bringing me flowers from school. Son #1 even brought me two yesterday. When I asked him why he got to bring two, he said Noah said his mother wouldn't like them. Oh my--I hope the teacher knows!

5. I was thankful I finished two books in the last two weeks. And for an upbeat book this last month in my book club. It was an autobiography called "A Girl Named Zippy" about growing up in a tiny town in Indiana. And this month we're reading the classic "To Kill A Mockingbird".

6. Our fridge/freezer locked up but we were lucky that it only cost $175 and was repairable. I did not want to have to buy a new fridge (although I do want a bigger boy sized fridge) to fit this house.

7. I'm thankful my aunt's surgery went well even though they had to replace her elbow joint. And that a friends car accident & cardiologist report were nothing significant.

8. And since we've had to be on the phone every day & multiple times a day with our doctor/nurse, we are truly thankful they care, give us their cell numbers & call to check in. We feel like royalty with their care & concern.

9. I'm always thankful for low-drama friends. Let's hear it for the normal & boring!!!

10. And finally, I'm so thankful that I got some medical stuff figured out & maybe now I won't be slug mommy and I can return to my regular go-go-go self.

Five Things You Might Not Know About Our Household

2009-04-30T07:11:00.000-07:00

Some people don't understand much about living with Autism, while others have seen a lot. But living with it daily & in our case in double amounts, there are every day things you may not realize.
Things that most all of us take for granted and may not realize the struggle it poses at our house. Obviously Autism is different for every person & each caregiver handles it different ways. This is just some of the stuff that goes on here at our house & how we handle it.

1. My kids don't blow their noses. You can try to explain the process over & over, and son#1 tries, but no dice. It'd sure help them tremendously if they could. The amount of sneezes they produce & the ferocity with which they sneeze...you'd be amazed. No one goes to college not knowing how to tie their shoes, but I really hope we can blow our nose by then.

2. Son #2 is not potty trained & after dinner is his "business" time. He sometimes even plays in it like a toddler. (Carrie didn't you have a story to tell me about this?) That's never fun to clean up on an 8 year old or the things around him. And we're in the biggest pull-ups they make. But it's very hard to reason and explain the digestive process to someone that doesn't speak and shows no interest. When son#1 potty trained, he watched the commercial for pull-ups & just wanted to be "a big kid now. Just like talking, late to the game, but when he did it, he just did it.

3. It took EIGHT years into our marriage before we got to sleep through the night on a regular basis. I guess it wasn't that terrible when you're right out of college and you're used to no sleep. But once I hit 30, I started to notice. We were so thankful that son#3 slept through the night from the get go. We felt we earned that one.

4. Son#2 loves food. He likes to watch me cook it, and eating is his favorite sport. This poses a problem after dinner. We barely get set down to eat ourselves, and he's almost done eating. As soon as dinner is over, we have to clean up--IMMEDIATELY. Any food left in pots/pans or on plates, all have to be cleaned up immediately or son#2 plays in it, strings it around the house or eats it. No pans soaking in our sinks or he plays in the water. At the end of the day after making dinner, the last thing I want to do is jump up & clean the entire kitchen. But we pay for it if we don't.

5. Our kids don't swallow medicine. They WILL throw up. So we have been fortunate enough to find a doctor that calls in almost anything to the compounding pharamcy so that we can have it topical form. It comes in a syringe without a needle, and is like lotion. In fact, son #1 still calls it "lotion medicine". We have Tylenol, Ibuprofen, and Phenegren for throwing up. If they just made one for the runs, we'd be set!

Side Effects

2009-04-22T12:03:00.000-07:00

Well, we've had some side effects pop up for son#2. We were confused for awhile about where the cause of the effects were coming from. Was it the old meds he was on for three years or was it the new meds meeting some of the old in his body & having a reaction. He's ticing his head to the side & rolling his neck so violently & so often, that there was a point where we were worried he'd have convulsions or a seizure. Easter weekend it was happening every 2 seconds literally. Poor kid was smart enough to figure out if he laid down in bed, the gravity would hold his head back. He didn't even sit at the dinner table, his favorite place. When he would sit there for 5 minutes, he'd hold his head in his hand. It was horrible to watch as a parent & nto be able to help.We couldn't even demonstrate it to someone without getting dizzy after a couple of throws of the head. And we weren't doing it nearly as hard. Not to mention I'm sure he had a headache but couldn't tell us. We were afraid to leave him alone in a room or give him a bath or shower, in case he fell & hurt himself.

After seeing the doctor yesterday, she is afraid he has Dystonia Movement Disorder. We are to see a psychiatrist because they are more familiar with seeing this and can tell the difference between that & just tics. It really isn't too promising considering that it's a vicious cycle. If son#2 doesn't take the meds, he hurts himself. When he takes the meds, he ticcing and that could lead to permanent ticcing or paralysis in the neck.

We are trying to be patient & wait but as a parent, that's not what I want to do, nor is it what's the easiest thing to do. He is making tons of strides at school and is really maturing in many ways. The ticcing has lessened, but he walks around with his arm over his head, holding his head still. As the doctor said, "Like the poor kid needs one more thing to work through." Hopefully we'll have answers soon, but in the meantime, we wait.

Autism & Bare Minerals Make-Up--Help Us Raise $$!

2009-04-09T06:30:00.000-07:00

Since April is Autism Awareness month, what better time to release a fund raising opportunity for the cause! Below was posted on my Bare Escentuals Addicts (BEA) bulletin board a couple of weeks ago.* Click anything that has a different color to purchase or read more about.

I was so pleased to be given such a fun and enjoyable opportunity to help raise money for Autism. Please feel free to buy more than one for teacher gifts, Mother's Day, Christmas or birthday presents or just to help raise money. They are $13. ~Julie

The BE Cares team at Bare Escentuals, are thrilled to tell you that the Spring 2009 BEAUTY Cares Campaign is ready to launch.

This campaign will raise funds for Autism Awareness with a donation to Autism Research International through the sale of a specially created color called "Puzzle". Puzzle was created by Julie Swaim, a long-time member of BE Addicts and the mom of two autistic boys, Jackson and Carson.

Jules worked with BE to provide lots of input into the creation of a color which describes all the many, many aspects of the autism spectrum. The result is a gorgeous, shimmery, ever-changing kaleidoscope of sparklies in a base of creamy lavender-pink. As with our other BEAUTY Cares colors, Puzzle is versatile. You can wear it dry for a more subdued neutral look, but if you want to really show it off and unearth its full spectrum of characteristics, foil it with a damp brush.

We hope you'll love Puzzle as much as we do and that you'll pull out all the stops to help put this charity color over the top, just like you've done each and every time. Please click this link to purchase the eye color. Puzzle will be available in all BE Boutiques until the end of the charity campaign or stock is exhausted, whichever comes first.

Feel free to link to this message on other people who will want to participate in our fund raiser. We want to create a hugely fantastic donation for Autism Research Institute and make sure we have a sell-out of the color.

Thanks for your support!
The BE Cares team

* I've deleted some names as well as the info that is now irrelevant.

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-04-07T07:05:00.000-07:00

1. Hubbo brought me 3 magazines, including a knitting one & a word search book from the store Sunday.

2. My friend Tammy brought us homemade pot roast Saturday night with carrots & potatoes. Rolls, grapes & some iced brownies that Hubbo LOVED. Thanks Tammy!

3. I can put more pressure on my foot now, just not much at a time.

4. I got to go scrapbook Friday night with my friends. My husband was kind enough to drop me off & my friend Terry & her husband Max were nice enough to take me home. I didn't get a huge amount done, but boy was it nice to get out.

5. Hubbo's still getting kids ready in the mornings & on the bus. Which is a good thing. It takes me FOREVER to wake up after taking a pain pill at night. I'm yawning as I write this.

6. Today is Mr. Johnny's birthday. Mr. Johnny is the janitor at son#1's school. He wears overalls & is very soft spoken but so good with the kids. And son#1 has taken a special liking to him. Mr Johnny even sent son#1 a coloring book & crayons when he was home after having his tonsils out. And on his birthday one year sent him a card with 8 crisp one dollar bills. (son#1's favorite number) Today the kids are dressing in overalls & flannel shirts & bringing birthday cards. Since it's son#1's last year there, the teacher will take a picture for me. We've been very lucky & blessed to have such great people at our sons' schools. Even the janitors care!

7. Hubbo brought another surprise from the store the other day, to eat after the kids went to bed.8. The church we attend has hired a new preacher & they have an Autistic son who has some issues with staying in services. I believe he is 16 years old. This is very encouraging because I think they intend to make a room for him to be should be not want to be in the auditorium for services. Son#2 can't go because he is too loud & obviously is too big for the nursery so there's been no where to take him. If they follow through on this, our whole family may get to go to church together as a family which hasn't happened in years.

9. BE Cares campaign with Autism is allowing me to share my sons stories of Autism & how it's touched our lives & bring more people to use Bare Escentuals mineral makeup. (more to come)

10. The "baby", son#3, is saying "mommy" this week. I LOVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! One out of three ain't bad!

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-03-31T14:16:00.000-07:00

Ten Things I'm Thankful For After Breaking My Ankle Saturday

1. A husband that doesn't mind picking up the house & doing laundry & knows how to get the kids ready for school.

2. My kids have been good--even poor #2 that's had medicine issues.

3. Hubbo's boss who let him off work for two days and lent us a "walking helper device" which
I refuse to call a walker. The kids refer to it as a stroller.

4. Friends that have called and checked on me through emails & Facebook. So sweet!

5. That danged deadly snow is gone.

6. New toenail polish. Purple to match my ankle.

7. Marathon tv shows on Bravo and A&E.

8. Magazines/books

9. KNITTING!!!

10. The treadmill. Without it, it's one long jump to the bathroom with nothing to hold on to.

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-03-24T11:40:00.000-07:00

1. Company (in-laws) finally got to come visit this weekend!! We've been trying since Valentines weekend. All family members finally well on both sides.

2. Clean comedy. Brian Regan--- http://www.brianregan.com/

3. Spring Break is OVER!!!!!!!!

4. Son#2 is off his old meds & the tics have stopped. The new meds seem to be working although we're still working on doses which means there are times that aren't so fun. We're winning though!

5. Because Facebook has changed their format & style, it's not as user friendly. Wondering what I'm thankful for then? It's less addictive which means more time for other things.

6. My mom & aunts come tomorrow for a visit. We're going for Chinese & I think it's safe to say I won't have to entertain the baby much.

7. I'm in love with Philadelphia Cream Cheese Spreadable in the Spinach/Artichoke flavor. Coupled with a Ritz cracker, I'm in heaven!

8. One of the pluses from company coming to visit, your house gets cleaned.

9. Today was trash day so last night we cleaned out the fridge as a family by eating all leftovers for dinner. I love to kill two birds with one stone. Well, not really.

And #10--- I was able to be a part of something really fantastically fun, benefiting Autism. More on that later if you're NOT one of the millions I've already told.

Son#1 Journal

2009-03-23T13:27:00.000-07:00

This is a throw back to February folks---enjoy the literal mind of son#1. Remember it's fill in the blank

When the groundhog sees it's shadow,it means 20 more weeks of winter. (when you think about it, this seems more true than the usual 6).

I want to have a party for, Christopher Council. We can play the Wii.

I wish I could build, a house that has computers in it. I use 2 computers.

If animals could talk, it would say: thank you. It would play with me. Animals always talk.

I was mean to someone when, I hit someone with a baseball bat. I told someone I am sorry. I was kind. (I really hope it was a Nerf bat. Surely the school would have called me right? I'm pretty sure they have a no tolerance policy for bullies.)

If there was no television, I would read a book. Then I would buy the TV. TV is fun.

I'll never eat, Cool Ranch Doritos. I like Nacho Cheese better. Nacho Cheese is cool.

Abraham Lincoln was, the 16th President. He freed the slaves. He was the 1st President to get shot down by John Wilkes Booth. (his teacher made sure we saw this one)

We celebrate George Washington's birthday because, he was the 1st President. He was the "father of our country". He was good.

I like to help my parents, get the van fixed. We took it to the car hospital. We took it home.

I'd love to learn how to play, the Wii. On the Wii I play Lego Star Wars 3.

This one is ALL him--even the parenthesis.
A movie I like to watch over & over is, Star Wars. I have 6 dvd's for 6 episodes. Star Wars is awesome. (includes disc 2 for 1,2 and 3 and IV, V and VI. Includes bonus discs.)

My favorite smell is, Germ-X. It is blueberry. It's good on my hands. (I had Sharpies, he has hand sanitizer. I wonder if that's considered "huffing"?)

If I could live in space, I would live on the moon. I would put a flag on there. I would see earth.

The snow is, good. I would play on the snow. I would build a snowman.

Spring Break-Day Five

2009-03-20T09:38:00.000-07:00

11am
Son#2 crying, wants to go somewhere, brings me clothes. Trying to get three kids half dressed to go to the bank. Fun--NOT. Van battery dead. Son#2 was in the garage the other day with the door open. Hubbo came home, shut the door thinking it hadn't been open long. Guess it was open longer than we thought.

11:40am
Do you hear that? It's glee in my "voice" as I type.
Nothing can get me down...(knock on wood) because in approximately 5 and a half hours, I have back up until school starts. There is nothing so lonely for me as Spring Break & Christmas break. Sometime I'll tell you about the frantic, tense pace that exists all day with the three boys all home & how utterly exhausting it is. But right now, I'm gonna go "celebrate the moments of my life" with a little Cafe Vienna.

1pm
Son#2 didn't eat his mac & cheese, he wanted MY lunch. Figures. And the remote is missing...it was here just a few minutes ago.

2pm
Son#3 has outgrown naps. Is there any justice in this world!?

Spring Break-Day Four

2009-03-19T08:27:00.000-07:00

8:30am
Two out of three up. Son#1 bugging me to get up. For some reason he needs me
To get out of bed so he can start his day.

9:30am
Baby gets up happy and with no fever and no cough. Yay!
I'm choosing not to give son#2 any mess today to see if the
Tics stop. Although I reserve the right to change my mind at any time
today. The thought of no meds needed--wow. But like the house
I won't get my hopes up just yet.

10:30am
Do you hear that? Angels singing. I've heard an angel gets his wings
when a mommy gets a shower.
Son#2 has a thing with long hair lately and if it's wet, well
That's even better. He keeps coming up behind as I type
and smelling my hair.

11:30am
Son#2 needs pill. That didn't last long. At least one pill seems to be doing it for the whole day & we're not using anything for bedtime.

7pm
The realtor has another client with a daugther with Autism. She is thinking of moving to our town. She asked for permission to give her my info so I could fill her in on our school system & Autism programs here. She called--I talked for an hour & a half about the pros. She said a developmental Peds dr had once told her if she was considering our school system, she might as well keep her kids home. Boy did I refute THAT! Keith Olberman here I come!!!!!!!!

Spring Break-Day Three

2009-03-18T12:02:00.000-07:00

Day Three--HUMP DAY!----

8:30am
Hubbo on his way home from the store & getting a new tire for the car.

9:30am
Wake baby, poor guy has a runny nose like a faucet & a cough to boot. Medicine for the whole room on the house!

11am
Baths for #2 & #3. Not much space left in the tub for toys, so they got creative bringing in the bathmat with them.

11:30am
Realtor calls, house decision still up in the air. Wheee!

Noon
Lunch---why is it all the kids only what I'm eating? Even when I feed them first? I'm getting sick of food. 4 breakfasts--if I get one. Four lunches & 2 different dinners. Son#1 has chosen now to go on a growing spurt & eat us out of house & home. Right when son#2 goes off the meds that make him want seconds & thirds. Our grocery bill may never be the same.

2:12pm
Part of what is trying my patience is I can't open the fridge or unlock the pantry without one of them being behind me sneaking things out. Drives me insane! That and son#2's meds make him a tad manic at times. This means constant turning off of the light switches in rooms, shutting doors, handing you everything you never wanted or asked for as well emptying drawers & throwing clothes around the house. Specifically in corners & behind tv cabinets.

I might need TWO blood pressure pills today.
After yesterday's poop incident & the baby's cold or whatever, we're not venturing outside. It's 80 degrees already & it's a playdough, marker/coloring day instead.

Spring Break-Day Two

2009-03-17T08:43:00.000-07:00

Day Two:

8:45am
I'm up & doing dishes before any of the younger ones are up to "help". Son #1 is in the living room loudly playing Wii. Of course he left the bedroom door open. Can't believe son#2 didn't wake up.
Son#3 slept till 9:30am--slight fever last night, runny nose & phlemy cough. Off to vacuum...

10:30am
Med time. Son#2's new med, slipped into a spoonful of blueberry applesauce. You have to strategically place it so that he doesn't scrape it off the spoon with his teeth or the jigs up.
Son#1's you have to crush, crush again, melt in a tablespoon of water, then down the hatch with 7-Up. Although today he had to settle for diet Sierra Mist & he wasn't too happy. But it's one of those days he's complaining about EVERYTHING. Son#3 usually gets his in a syringe but decided today he was just too big for that now that he's three years old. He wanted his medicine on a spoon like big brother. I guess he really is growing up.

3:15pm
Corned beef, cabbage, potatoes in the oven for dinner. Son#3 in crib still yelling "Mom" since 1:30pm. Son#2 got in the fridge & ate the rest of the birthday cake with his hands.
Countdown to reinforcements--2 hrs.

4:03pm
Are you kidding me? Son#3 still yelling at me from his bed. Which I really don't understand because he had children's Tylenol 5 hours ago.
And apparently, one day without a poo incident goes against every Murphy's law there is for me in life.
Son #2 running around outside in the 80 degree day, eventually stripped down & the few minutes I wasn't watching him, pooped outside my bedroom window. Without a pull-up on. I thought little boys just liked to pee on things outside. Sigh. I don't care how warm it is the rest of this week, we may never go outside again.

Spring Break--Day One

2009-03-16T08:51:00.000-07:00

Day One--11am

Well, we already have poo people. Within 30 minutes of getting up I had not only a poopy diaper, but I got it all over my arm. I take a shower, feel all clean, ready to start my day--pretend that poopy diaper never happened. But I kept smelling poo. Check kitchen, not only is the floor an array of cow patties, somehow, some way, there is poo on my oven door! How in the heck are the physics of that possible?

10:50am
We leave in the van to go meet Hubbo at work to sign some papers on the house. This involves snacks in ziplocks, cups for everyone, a Nintendo DS, a koosh ball and some Lego guys. Oh and did I mention son#2 won't stay in his seatbelt? Since we got the van he's discovered how to let himself out of his seatbelt. We acquired these bad boys.
Hopefully this will dissuade him, although on the way back, he unbuckled his brothers seatbelt to the carseat. Good thing these came in twos.

4:30pm
Playing outside, let's hope son#2 keeps his clothes on. All of them.

All in all, today wasn't that bad. No major meltdowns & mommy's still sane. Score one for the hometeam!

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-03-03T11:04:00.000-08:00

1. The baby has been really ill with a high fever since Saturday evening. I'm thankful today he seems a little more like himself. Less glassy eyed. He's more like a colt trying to learn to walk but at least he has more pep today & NO fever.

2. I'm thankful that as of today, my husband has a job. I know that in this economy that's precious and hopefully even though his company is slow with business lately, he'll keep it.

3. Dr. Pepper has finally made a CHERRY DR. PEPPER! (and diet) without vanilla! They sure
took long enough but I'm just happy it's finally here!

4. Vicks nose inhalers. The weather here has been cold, then 80 degrees, then 17. The rest of this week it's picking back up to the 70's & such. My sinuses don't know whether to believe me that winters really over.

5. I'm very thankful I found the missing DVD-R remote yesterday!! It's been missing several months and I've missed recording things as easily. Oh who am I kidding, I make Hubbo do all that.

6. And I'm thankful that my sister-in-law and her family, can STILL try on our fifth weekend of trying, to come down & see us. Hopefully. Knock on wood.

7. Magazines. I love a good thumb-through. Has kept me sane with all the fever watching around here lately.

8. Federal tax returns on e-file.

9. A quick lunch out with a friend Saturday since I missed mine with the family.

10. Prayers that are answered.

Have You Ever Had One of THOSE Days?

2009-02-27T06:37:00.000-08:00

Have you ever had one of those days, not even necessarily bad, where you're so busy that at the end of the day you want to burn your clothes? Where it feels like you lived a week in them all in one day? You never want to see them again. Not even the socks.

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-02-24T16:37:00.000-08:00

It's been awhile since I've done this, but someone reminded me of that today. And when things are hectic or crazy stressful and I don't feel in the mood to write what I'm thankful for, I just want to complain, and that's the time to truly take count of one's blessings right? So here ya go Sarah!

1. I'll lead off with the obvious, this week has contained MANY less diapers containing bio hazards. For that, I am TRULY, TRULY thankful.

2. I had a wonderful time this weekend spending a great deal of Fri night & Saturday with friends. I hadn't had much of that this month & boy did I miss it. I think my soul has come to count on it. We laughed, ate and scrap booked. But we also really got to talk and get into each others issues that were weighing on our hearts. Somehow even when your husband is your best friend, it always feels so good to say the same things out loud to a girlfriend. Being of the same sex, you really believe them when they say they understand or have been there. It validates your feelings & somehow takes away that feeling that occasionally creeps in that you're living with an alien.

3. I'm thankful for finding www.verseoftheday.com where God guides me and my problems daily. It's like a horoscope for your soul.

4. I have much more "things" than I've ever had in a home. Today I'm going to choose to be thankful I have all these blessings instead of complain for the millionth time about where all this stuff came from.

5. Sonic's Raspberry Tea---my newest addiction. I believe God sent it to me to get me through the rough patches like he sent Elijah mana.

6. My "Mama Mia" soundtrack. It is such a pick-me up! It really gets me happy and I love each & every song. Even the song Pierce Broson sings is growing on me.

7. Green bean casserole. I made this tonight because son#2 loves it. We really only have it on holidays & this year I don't think we had it at all. We're trying to keep him on a non-dairy diet & non-spicy foods until his intestines pick back up to normal. Not only did he love it, I think it was a little comfort food for the soul for me too. Isn't it funny how sometimes tasting a certain food can almost bring you back to a different place in time? My Grandma Bible used to have THE best Thanksgiving spread.

8. I got a mani/pedi last week the day before Valentines day & the virus started. It felt great to sit there & zone out and let the massage chair just work it's magic. All by myself.

9. Sour Cream & Onion Lays--green chips as son#1 calls them. I have never really been excited by sour cream & onion chips. But now, I am truly wanting to suck the coating off these and could eat a family sized bag myself. Not that I WOULD mind you...

10. My roommate is pretty darn good at laundry & diapers, not to mention cleaning up the bio hazard materials. I was thankful he & I stayed well this past week and that he stayed home to help out three days. I wouldn't trade him for anything.

Well....unless you happen to have a Sonic raspberry tea and green Lays.;)

Dear Diary

2009-02-23T11:35:00.000-08:00

Dear Diary,

Things here have been rather crazy the past few weeks. The kids woke up sick on Valentines day and the baby & son#2 still are showing signs of it in the rear end area. Son#2 hasn't been to school since Feburary 13th. Luckily Hubbo was home 3 out of 5 days last week helping take care of kids & save my sanity. Also, son#1 keeps running a low-grade mystery fever at night. No symptoms, then it's gone by morning.

I called the doctor today after trying to send son#2 to school and then picking him up ill, nurse said there is something called Florastor Kids that you can get at the drug store for sprinkling on their foods. It is a pro-biotic & restores the good bacteria that this virus has caused the intestines to sweep away with the bad. Hopefully, the stench will find it's way to a different house soon too. I never knew we could run out of Wal-Mart sacks but last time I went to the store Hubbo told me to bag everything seperately.

In other news, son#3 shocked himself Saturday night. When we heard him scream and son#1 start screaming "Don't let me brother burn to death!" we came running. Always a dead give-away something is wrong I think. Son#3 had a black mark on his hand where his thumb meets his palm and some black marks on the ends of his fingers. I checked him over really good, and washed the black mark off--no burn luckily. After a call to Nana, we deemed him okay. I think he got over it faster than son#1 did. We assumed this is what happened: Son#2 likes to chew cords but we have NEVER caught him chewing the lamp in the living room before. Apparently he had, and when son#3 went to plug it in, it zapped him. Son#1 said he heard a loud pop & the baby started crying & holding his hand. The next day we found through an open window near the lamp, son#2 had thrown the plug part of the lamp outside. It had come off with the pop. I don't think son#3 will be plugging anything in for awhile.

Today I thought it was too quiet, went to check son#2 and son#3 today, nowhere to be found in the house. I finally saw the key in the backdoor. Son#2 has gotten tall enough & smart enough to find the key on the top shelf, get it down & put it in the back door. The little hoodlums were out there running around half naked! Son#3 was in a t-shirt & pull-up, barefoot and son#2 was just in a pull-up jumping in the trampoline. FORTY degrees outside!

We did get our van back & all the tags, titles and papers are in order. Now I'm waiting for the cleaning fairies to come to my garage in the middle of the night so we can move around the van in there better. Although, today while on the way to the bank, son#2 discovered how to unbuckle himself in the van. Little easier than the car I guess. He was out & out again. I kept pulling over & re-buckling him. Then at the bank I just let him up front so I could moniter the buckle situation. But that posed new issues. He could obviously reach the door handle, locks & windows if he wanted. While I was worrying about all that, he figured that gear shift sticking out was different than the car & looked like it'd make a good thing to yank on. I had to get pretty stern with him because obviously we don't want the NEW transmission just falling out down the road while we're driving along. Then he found it hilarious to reach over & play with the steering wheel, pick at me and slap at the gear shift some more. I barely got home. Front seat, NOT working, not even in an emergency. SO, we're about to order some seatbelt locks that are designed to guard the vehicle seat belt release button from the fingers of special needs children or adults with cognitive disabilities such as ADD, Angelman Syndrome, Alzheimers, Autism, etc. www.buckleboss.com

I really have to say I'm looking forward to the end of this month, shhh we must not even utter it's name. Bad juju. March is looking really good right now. Bring on the tornados & snow!!

Fun, Cool & Cute-Adjectives of a 10 year old

2009-02-17T09:05:00.000-08:00

This is son#1's January Journal for school. They are fill in the blanks--his answers are in bold.

Before winter is over I want to play in the snow. I like to build a snow man. It was good.

If I saw a mouse in my house I would be it's friend. I will feed him food and drink. He is cool.

My favorite gift of all time is Lego Star Wars 3, the Complete Saga. Matt got that for me. It was fun.

An animal I'm afraid of is nothing. I like animals. They are cute.

If I had a magic wand I would make a bunny appear. I will also make Lego Darth Vader appear. The hat is cool.

I wish my school had a playground. I would swing. School is cool. (his school does have swings)

When someone is crying I say what is it? I would give her a toy. She likes it.

On my birthday I blow out candles. I open my presents. My birthday is fun.

Martin Luther King Jr is special because he had a dream. He had an idea. He made a new way.

If you could ask the new President to do something, what would it be? Keep the earth clean.

If I had a hundred dollars I would buy Lego guys. It will go with all Legos. I'd take them home.

Valentines Thoughts

2009-02-13T12:51:00.000-08:00

For the boys I bought two types of valentines---3D dog/cats and then some from the movie Cars--those came with pencils. Of course I thought it was perfect that the Cars valentines came with pencils with RED erasers (son#1's fav color) and since son#2's class likes tactile, the 3D zippy ones for him. Son#1 hates addressing them so I always end up writing everything but his name. And what does he tell me, that he doesn't WANT the Cars valentines, he wants the dogs & cats. Sigh!

But here's my real beef---why do manufacturers make packets of Valentines in different numbered packs??

Does that make sense to you? My kids classes are a tad smaller than the norm & I realize that. But why do I end up with a pack of 24 and a pack of 16?? I ended up just using the dog/cat ones & had enough for BOTH boys classes and teachers with some leftover. Now I have 4 leftover valentines in that pack. What am I supposed to DO with them??? FOUR? Why not just make ALL valentine packs in the same number? If you need 25....you have to buy one whole other pack just to get enough and then you have a lot of leftovers you can't recycle next year. Talk about major faux pas! So you throw them away?

I propose we have grab bag type Valentines. Sort of like those little $.25 bags of chips? Shoot valentines are cheap already--35 for $2! They could be like cold medicine--put them behind the counter . That way you can get what you want. And then you can also get exactly the number you need. And you have to show your drivers license to get to the good ones. Maybe even someone to evaluate whether THAT'S the card your wife would like. Might save men some trouble.

All I know is by the time my kids are out of valentine giving age, I'll have enough hodge podge valentines to give one to everyone in their college classes!

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-02-03T12:29:00.000-08:00

1. The ice came & although it stuck around for 4 days or so, and I'm thankful to say we kept power. Which is more than I can say for some of my friends in Arkansas. We even got some temps this weekend up in the 60's, however we still have ice in the shade that's still thick & not melting.

2. I'm thankful that the kids FINALLY went back to school this week. They only went last Monday & Friday. We were all getting cabin fever.

3. Saturday my mom slipped on the ice getting up on the curb, but thankfully she's alright. Nothing broken. She softened the fall with her face though.

4. January 2009 is OVER. I would ask for a do-over for such a crappy month, but I really don't wish to repeat much of anything that happened last month. Seriously, 90% of people I know had not so great January 2009's also. I think we should all be thankful the month is over & we're moving on. Onward & upward!

5. I've probably said this before, but I'm thankful for Facebook. This past week I've found several girls I went to church with growing up, and it's been a welcome surprise. Last night at bookclub the older ladies were discussing how as years go on, more people die that knew you when you were younger--knew your history. Remembered you as child. They tried to tell me and another "youngun" that we didn't understand. But I think because of Facebook, I do! It has been an uplifting thing for me to find not only my first Sunday school teacher, but also people who knew me growing up and in grade school, high school, and college. I think it comforts me, cheers me and makes me a tad happier. Maybe that's because as a mother or just someone that recently turned 34 years old, I myself, even forget who I was before this life I lead now. I used to take gymnastics, I sang in many choirs, and I loved playing dolls. I could swim forever, and I could climb a tree pretty well. Finding these people who knew me then, sort of makes me feel like that part of me ISN'T forgotten. It's a good feeling.

6. The van is getting a new transmission that we aren't paying for. And we'll hopefully have it this week. Thank you Lord!

7. I've had some friends (as I mentioned, January wasn't kind) with children that have had some issues lately. I'm thankful, so thankful that they are getting answers & healing. I hate seeing or hearing about children suffering. Not to mention the parental end of that worry. Boy can that stress out the ol' ticker.

8. I'm thankful for our trip to Wal-Mart Friday night as a whole family went well & was uneventful. Son#2 wanted to push the cart the whole time, son#3 rode in the cart & son#1 skipped through the whole store. Yep--good cure for cabin fever. They got to spend some Christmas gift cards and had new things to occupy them till Monday.

9. Son#1 has a school play tonight. They also peformed today for the whole school. I mistakenly told him this morning to break a leg. Sometimes even I forget how literal he is. Luckily he let me explain that I just meant good luck. Whew! Don't worry, I'm sure the dvd of tonights performance will provide lots of blog fodder.

10. Friday is Hubbo's birthday. We won't say which one, but it's about four years ahead of mine. So tonight since Nana is here to babysit, after the kids go to bed, we're heading out on our first movie alone together in, well.....years. I'm VERY thankful we get to go see the same movie at the same time. A date you could say! (Usually we go see a movie the same day, different times-- taking turns watching the kids.)

Martin Luther King Jr Day

2009-01-19T11:34:00.000-08:00

The kids are out of school today to celebrate Martin Luther King Jr. #1 son has only been excited because it means he doesn't have to go to school. This morning he woke up & he was confirming there was indeed no school today. Here's the conversation:

son#1: "No school today. It's Martin Lubber King Jr day."

me: "That's right."

son#1: "We love Martin Lubber King Jr."

me: "Yes we do. You do know he's dead though right?"

son#1: "He is?"

me: " Yeah he lived quite awhile ago. What DO you know about Martin Luther King Jr?"

son#1: "He was a President?"

me: "Nope--a preacher."

son#1: "Well, Martin Lubber King Jr wasn't allowed to do things other people were. He wasn't allowed to eat Doritos like the other kids. He couldn't even eat any Classic Lays. He had to eat the black* and green* ones. They were very mean to him. And now, because of Martin Lubber King Jr, I can eat the yellow Lays or any other color if I want. But I don't like the sour cream and onion. And I'd be sad if I had to eat them and not the Classic Lays."

me: "Yeah he wasn't allowed to do a lot of the same things other people were because of the color of his skin. Martin Luther King Jr was someone who fought for civil rights."

son#1: "I know. I said I don't have to eat the sour cream & onion if I don't want to."

me: *sigh*

*black Lays--BBQ
*green Lays--Sour Cream & Onion

So Are the Days of Our Lives

2009-01-13T11:55:00.000-08:00

I have plenty to be thankful for today, but instead I'll just give you the drama we had around here last week.
What you need to know beforehand is Hubbo was in a car accident March of 08. One rainy night turning into our subdivision, someone rear ended him. He was fine, we took pictures but unfortunately I had to spend a lot of time hounding Progressive (the lady that hit him's insurance) that we wanted to get our car fixed, not total it out. And we did accept a settlement from them, got our car fixed & moved on--after much hassle.

After Christmas we realized we never got our card in the mail saying we needed to get our car tag for 09 on the car. Hubbo comes home worried one night thinking it has to do with his car accident. I start to worry. I called tag agency in our town thenext morning and they said just bring in insurance card. Then I start to worry that maybe the non-English speaking lady didn't understand the issues. It IS complicated. So I wait & call back after lunch. SAME LADY. She runs my license plate # & says it's junked, can't drive it, can't sell it, can't get tags. "Park it, you no drive anymore."

I called our State Farm agent because I knew she spoke English & I could explain everything to her. She checks with someone, comes back & says get Progressive to give us a letter saying it's repaired/salvaged, take it to OK Tax Commision & get new tag.

I call Progressive girl Amber we worked with before, she says she doesn't know. Calls a tag agency they work with, says it IS junked. Can't get title, drive it, tag etc. Say I COULD call Tax Comm & explain & see what they say the options are. But offers if we have to get rid of it b/c we can't drive it, they'd pay us $479 for salvage & come get it. Said we can't even trade it in when we go get a new car/mini-van. Lovely. The car looks brand new. No dents, no cracked glass anywhere. We've BEEN driving it since March of 08!

So I just called Tax Commision they say IF, Progressive made a mistake on the percentage of totaled (60-79% is salvage, over 80% of the value of the car is junked--ours 81% ) car, then send a letter saying that to us. We could then take letter & car to tag agency, they inspect car, give new tag. Otherwise, if Progressive says it's STILL 81% then it's junked & we can't drive it when tag expires at end of Jan. Even though it runs, no duct tape, has heat/air and looks fine.

We've been waiting to get a second car until after we find a house. We've been searching for the house since May. We knew if we got a second car beforehand, it'd be on our credit and with our student loans (thanks Harding!) on there, we don't need ANY help weighing on our credit to get home loan. So now it looked like barring a miracle, we'll HAVE to get a new car before the end of January. Again, barring a miracle or $10-15,000 somewhere dropping out of the sky...I was thinking 2009 was off to a rocky start for us.

Okay---so the next day I spent the entire day on the phone AGAIN. This time I got some higher up people and made some progress.
I got ahold of The OK Insurance Comm. who sent me back to the OK Tax Comm. There I got ahold of a nice woman that told me that this all didn't sound right, and she asked to call in a higher up. I said BE MY GUEST! I'm not sure how high up she went.
I was on hold a good 5 minutes. Kent (the higher up) comes on the phone and already knows the story. Which I thought was nice of her not to make re-tell it for the millionth time in two days.

He says he understands completely because in Nov of 2008 a law was passed being more specific about what "junked" means in our state. So NOW, he at the Tax Comm had big problems because in two months he had accumulated two huge stacks of cases from Progressive Insurance. He said they were cases like ours where the cars were not totaled & if repaired, were driveable but couldn't get tags because they were labeled junked. That those should be given a letter to get a "Salvage for Title". With that we can't sell the car, but we can get a tag & drive it. Which is all we wanted!

Kent hadn't been able to get ahold of this Rebecca from Progressive that signs off on them all in two months. No one at Progressive wanted to give out her extension number. Apparently she gives a 1-888 number but no extension which he says is the polite way of saying, "Just TRY & get ahold of me." Kent said if I could get ahold of Rebecca at Progressive, we could all talk & he thought he could make her see the error of the way they were doing things. He was anxious to work with me since it meant clearing off stacks of cases off his desk. And he'd been trying to catch her for two months.
Thanks to my sister-in-law, I got what I thought was Rebecca's number but turned out to be Amber's at Progressive--the agent we'd been working with for a year now. Amber DID however, call Rebecca & she and Kent did a three-way conference call.

Kent explained he had all these cases with Rebecca's name on it and he wasn't able to get ahold of her for two months now. She said, of course, I sign off on all claims from OK. (Did I mention she's in OHIO?) Kent said they were very defensive at first, not wanting to accept any blame. He explained the law, explained the piles of cases on his desk. How, if it was their teenagers car that was not TOTALED, but repairable and then driveable, then you can't label it junked. People need to get back on the roads!

Rebecca had a light-bulb moment and gasped, "I have to send out an emergency memo to ALL agents in OK correcting how we do things!" Then Kent nicely pointed out she could write US a letter of correction telling the tag agency to give us a Title for Salvage so we could get a tag, OR, he Kent, could send a memo out to HIS whole state of Oklahoma saying that Progressive won't cooperate with them, so we won't issue tags or titles to their customers.
*Someone pointed out to me they had already seen a sign like that at a tag agency in OK recently.*

Guess what? Rebecca decided that it was more benefical to start with our case to declare a correction. Amber called me shortly after apologizing & stating the letter will be mailed out directly to our house & confirmed our address. Kent mentioned to them he didn't need it sent to him, to save time, send it directly to us. And Amber said if I didn't get it by the 19th to let her know. Kent also said, he was giving me his personal number so when I got the letter, take it to a tag agency and show them the letter & have them call him directly. He would log on to the computer & make sure they issued me a tag and title for salvage NOT JUNKED. WHEW! God answered the prayers!

I feel vindicated, and validated that it was common sense that this wasn't right. And to be honest, I'm thrilled that that it worked out for us, but think about the other people who's cases have been sitting on Kent's desk for two months? I just had to worry for 2 days, I'm hoping it helps them out too. I'm just thrilled it's over since I think it took some years off my life & I'm pretty sure gave me some gray hairs.

Ten Things Tuesday

2009-01-06T11:18:00.000-08:00

1. School has resumed. Do you hear that? It's called peace & quiet. What? Oh that? That sound is my blood pressure going down a few points.

2. My house is clean, dishes all done, dinner in the crockpot and laundry in the washer.

3. Three-fourths of the Christmas decorations are put away. The tree may not make it back to the garage. It's on it's last legs. Getting rid of it, sounds so much more appealing than restoring it at this point.

4. The weather is still cold. I know, I'm in the minority but I'm happy with winter as long as no power is lost & roads are safe.

5. Book club was wonderful last night. I needed that. Apparently Ms. Evelyn that I sat next to last night, let us in on the fact that the man who calls to tell you your books are in, has a sexy voice and great diction. (Evelyn is 84 years old and I think her memory is better than mine.)

6. I'm loving my birthday present. It's been a sanity saver the last couple of weeks. And to be honest, it's all mine, no one elses. Not many things fall into that category when you're a mommy.(Hubbo got me an iPod Touch)

7. I'm thankful for Facebook so I can keep up with family members & friends that don't live close by.

8. I finally got pretty close on a recipe that Hubbo wanted recreated from his youth. Tasted pretty good too. If you know Taco Time restuarants, I think I have a pretty good Crisp Meat burrito recipe. Although I'm still fooling around with which cheese is best.

9. Sounds weird but I'm so pleased son#1 isn't obessed with his Nintendo DS he got for Christmas. I was hoping he wouldn't turn into that kid that runs into you in the store because they aren't watching where they are going.

10. One of my resolutions this New Years is that my knitting projects this year, will be only be what I want to knit. and the majority will be for ME! I'm thankful for that--truly!:)

Ten Things Tuesday, er...Wednesday

2008-12-31T11:58:00.000-08:00

1. My kids were all three thrilled with their presents. It's hard to please a non-verbal 8 yr old, but I think we did pretty good this year. Except the fish we got died already...we won't speak of this anymore.

2. I was indulged for my birthday & it lasted over several days off and on. Maybe there are good points to having a birthday on Monday after all.

3. There was no stress for food prep during Christmas Eve or Christmas Day. I planned and stuck to the plan. Who knew that actually worked? And an extra shout out to Ore Ida frozen russet potatos. Those things are worth their weight in gold to not have to peel and boil them. Steam in the bag ten minutes, then mash. Easiest real mashed potatos ever!

4. Much pie was consumed. Birthday, pumpkin and chocolate. I love pie.

5. My gifts to my neices and nephews were a huge hit! From real tiara's to a remote controlled monster Jeep.

6. My ears don't ache which is grand! Now if they'll just pop I'd be on cloud nine. Hmm Cloud Nine pie still in the fridge....

7. Two days of Christmas break the kids were able to get outside for a whole afternoon. They jumped, swung (is that right?) and son#2 even found some mud to befriend all over his body.

8. I got a Christmas card from one of the only people I haven't found from high school. She and I were so close, I can't wait now to really reconnect!

9. I got out to the mall this past weekend (yes on purpose) with a friend for girl time. We banded together since we each go maybe once a year. Sadly we spent a good deal of time in Sears because we're both old. But we had a blast and I enjoyed the time away from my kids.

10. The baby still naps. It's my saving grace for 5 more days till school starts again.

From My Husband

2008-12-22T13:58:00.000-08:00

For my birthday today, my husband hid presents around the house for me to liven up the day since I would be home with all the kids on a regular ol' Monday. This is the card he picked and I think it's my favorite present because it pretty sums us up.

For My Wife

You know the story.
Two people meet and fall in love,
they move all their belongings
into the same small place
and begin to make a life together.

They discover that they have three toasters,
two blenders, and not even one coffeemaker.
They don't fold their shirts the same way,
and they can't always agre on
whose turn it is to clean house.

But these are the little things,
and because these two people love each other
they find a way to work them out.
As time passes, there are other things--
money worries, illnesses, family crises.
These are the big things.
But because the two people love each other,
they find a way to work them out, too.

And on special days like birthdays,
they think about each other
and about all the fun stuff they share
and about how their love has
got them through the not-so-fun stuff.

And he says to her...
"Thanks for everything. I still love you very much."

Autism 101

2008-12-15T14:13:00.001-08:00

When you have an Autistic person in your life it's a little hard for even the people closest to you, to understand fully what your life is like. And sometimes it's even more akward to ask how you manage certain things as a family. People feel shy about asking these things and it's understandable. Not many of us would say to someone that's lost their limb, "How did you loose your leg?" even though we may really be wanting to know so that we can better understand that person's life issues. Education, in my opinion, is power. Whether it's a friend or loved one, knowing the story behind an injury, loss or disease, gives you the compassion to understand that persons life struggles. Everyone has them, ours just may be a little different & new to you.

As a new idea for the blog, I thought I'd ask my friends random times throughout the months, to give me a few questions. Anything easy or difficult about our lives with the boys and how Autism affects us as a family. Then I will answer as honestly & plainly as possible. And if you don't know me, then I should tell you I'm pretty honest & don't do well at hiding things, so you WILL get an honest answer from me. I'm not a doctor, but I do have a degree in Child Development. But I consider myself to have my Masters in it now as well. After ten years parenting two Autistic children, I feel I deserve at least that right?;)

I also hope in months to come, that any of you that know us or even those that don't, will feel free to ask anything you would like to know. Don't worry if it's too personal, I'll let you know if it's something that I don't feel like sharing at this point in time. Now I will warn you, these questions are directed at ME, they will have answers about MY family. So please do not feel you need to compare my children & their progress to yours. If it's one thing we DO know about Autism, it's that all the children on the spectrum & their cases are very individual & different. And if you feel that what you're reading is "wrong" or I say something you don't agree with, stop reading & find yourself a new blog that you do agree with. It'll be a lot less bothersome to us both I promise.

This week my friend Lisa, who I've known since college, gave me some questions and I think they are great for starting this idea off right. Thank you Lisa for taking the time & having the interest to help me out.

1. When and how did you first find out your son's were autistic? Did anything "tip you off" as a parent?

This is a very common question actually. And I think it's the one people feel most comfortable asking. When son#1 was a baby there were things we noticed. Things that caught our attention but never alarmed us. We just waited until the next doctor appointment to ask about it. One was even by 6 months old, he never wanted to hold his own bottle. But you push that aside & say "What a lazy baby! Isn't that cute?" He also flapped his hands if excited and did walk on his tip toes. (those are sort of universal signs now) He hated anything new and would cry and place his hands over his ears if we went new places or loud places. Two examples of that are as follows.

Once when son#1 was about 9 months, we went to a high school football game outside. We made the mistake of sitting by the band. Bad idea. Son#1 flipped out crying & covering his ears and we had to leave.
Also, when he was older, about 4 yrs old, we moved to a new town & tried to attend a new church. He wasn't used to that building & cried, covered his ears and wailed. This to most people sounds like a temper tantrum, you spank them and make them do it. He put his hands on either side of the door & grabbed on and wouldn't let go. He never let go till we said we'd leave. He screamed at the top of his lungs, shaking all over and scared. You could see he wasn't just being a bratty kid. He was terrified of the new place. Too much stimulation, sensory overload. Too much for his brain to take in & process. Most of us use our brain, eyes, ears, nose etc to take in a new place & process it. Son#1 (and most Autistic kids) a visual learners, it was just too much. Like a circuit shorting out, he would have a meltdown.

Son#1 never babbled a lot or pointed at things. But I remember right before he was 18 months old, we went on a trip. He stayed with my parents and when we returned my mother mentioned he was saying baby. Son#1 had 5-6 words then. Soon after that trip, we did get the MMR shot. I just can look back & see he stopped using those few words & didn't speak again until he was 4 yrs old. The not talking, was a huge sign & that's when we sought out a doctor.
Talking to the doctor, she gave a diagnosis & we love her for being aware, it took us awhile to find her, and that she was informed about such things was a God-send. This was all so new in 1998-99. It wasn't the epidemic proportion it is now. It was just the beginning of all that.

Son#2 we were watching from day one. And the only different thing we noticed about him, was that he walked on his tip toes. (both walked early at 7-8 months) However, son#2 never spoke or babbled either. And now, he babbles, but still doesn't use words to communicate & he is 8 yrs old.

2. Sometimes friends don't know how to act or feel awkward when they discover a child is autistic. What do you recommend they do?

Umm, this is a bit more difficult to answer. Each person I encounter is so different in their personality. Some are blunt, some are so gentle & tactful, others are good at ignoring issues. I think everyone needs to do what they are comfortable with, but know that the person you're asking questions to, has their own personality also. Some only let you in so far, and other parents might be shy, upset, reserved or just relieved you cared enough to ask a question.

I'd go with how well you know the person. Get a feeling, a reading off the person. Are they relaxed? Then just be yourself. If they're uptight, look for ways to maybe help if you think that's what they need--maybe just pick up a toy that got dropped for the hundredth time. Or if they seem uptight and you see them focused & in their own world, sometimes it's better to just not add to any issues that may be going on at the time. But I think it's always good to reach out to parents whenever it looks to be a good, approachable situation. Let them know you're not scared off by their kids issues. And you can do that by just treating them like any other friend. Email them if you're worried about catching them at a bad time, or call & leave messages. Actions speak louder than words.

Maybe ask them when you see them, when a good time to call and catch up with them is. That way if there is a routine they adhere to (which I bet there is in most Autistic homes) you can avoid disrupting that therefore ensuring you get to really talk to your friend.

Around the children, I'd be yourself, don't touch or come into their space unless they approach you first. Remember all those rules about a stray dog? Sort of the same thing. You don't know this child or their issues they struggle with. Don't touch them, don't do anything to taunt them like offering food in front of them or offering candy (again, you don't know their diet or what they like/dislike--but you should ask the parent, they'd be happy for you to engage their child & will most likely tell you the way to do so). And don't get in their space unless they make the first move, you don't want to scare them. My sons are very affectionate but son#1 will tell perfect strangers he loves them when they meet him for the first time. However, son#2 does not want you in his personal space unless he comes around to "sniff" you out. Oh, and they can smell fear. Just kidding. Sort of. I think son#2 really can sense when someone isn't comfortable and it puts him at ill ease and then problems can start.

And perhaps it's good to remember there is a fine line between pity & compassion.

3. What are your thoughts about the whole Jenny McCarthy my-child-was-cured-of-autism story?

Well, here is where I might offend some people, but you asked my opinion and this is MY blog, so here goes. I read her first book on her son when it came out. It's always very interesting to me to hear about other stories of how Autism touched their life. I knew Jenny McCarthy was divorced, I wanted to know if that was a result of the diagnosis. The divorce rate among parents of Autistic parents is 80%. I wanted to know as someone with unlimited (so I thought) resources, if there was something I was missing out on to help my children. And I'm nosy. I love biographies anyway so this was a chance to peek into a celebrity's life and one who may have some of the same issues we have at our house.

First, she is a great story teller. I laughed, I cried and I learned some things about Autism I didn't know. Some things my sons never had to deal with. It was interesting. Hubbo read it. There were answers to questions we have for someone parenting Autistic children. Yes, those of us living with the disease in our home have questions for other parents too, it's probably just easier for us to ask them.

I did not read her second book. The one with "cure" in the title. I did watch her on Oprah, I did see many other interviews with Jenny McCarthy. I just got the impression (after watching her on the Oprah show) that she felt the need to cure her child of Autism. I'm not judging her motives, I think they are genuine. She is a loving mother. I just don't know that I believe any child with Autism is cured yet. Functioning on a MUCH higher level than before due to something that worked for them, YES. Now, I realize some eyebrows just went up. YES, of course I want my children cured too. I hope there is a cure, so my children can have babies without the worry of passing on this disease. But I live every day to the fullest, knowing my children will not die from Autism. There are so many other worse physical problems my children could have. We don't have it easy, but it's not the hardest road we could be walking down in life & we're fully aware of that.

I personally don't believe there is a cure yet. I think I've seen a few kids (that I know personally) do so much better in their strive for normalcy, from things like diet or therapies. That's wonderful! Thank God for that. I have seen son#1 go from not speaking and utter frustration to a verbal, high-functioning ten year old that is pretty darn smart. Even his social skills are improving daily. He's acting more like a pre-teen every day in fact. That pleases me & gives me less worry than when he was smaller. But I don't believe that even if son#2 talks tomorrow, he's cured. There are things they live with daily that will probably always be there--even if to the average person they act "normal". Each child on this spectrum is so very, very different, that I do not believe there is one cure for everyone to drink & be well. I pray there's a cure in my children's lifetime, and I hope that includes isolating the gene so it's not passed on.

Eleven Things Tuesday

2008-12-09T07:46:00.001-08:00

1. Hubbo doesn't have pneumonia, he has bronchitis. Lesser of two evils.

2. A hot rice bag & Midol

3. We have central heat.

4. Son#2 stayed at school all day Monday.

5. Bunco & the many gifts it gives. Friends, fun, food & real gifts.

6. Hubbo brought me a doughnut & Frappuccino this morning.

7. My new toaster

8. Salvation Army who is coming Wednesday to pick up a ton of stuff.

9. My tree is up, even if it is listing to the side.

10. Cable television--so there was something on to watch when I was up at 2am.

11. That son#1 didn't really have a girl in his room at age 10, when the other morning first thing I hear is:
"Where's that woman that was in my bed last night? She's missing."

Turned out to be the little mom figure from a playset. Whew!

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-12-02T08:10:00.000-08:00

1. Thanksgiving went as well as we could have hoped. It went by in a flash and then there was son#2 running down the road flashING. I guess sometimes we just have to embrace the warm weather in November & do apparently what comes naturally.

2. I got to see my cousins & their kids/husbands & baby on the way. One cousin home from the Air Force & others in from Virginia/Pentagon. All safe & healthy.

3. I was one of the people that was at Wal-Mart at 4am the day after Thanksgiving. Some call us crazy, I say crazy like fox. I got HUGE deals & am 99% done with Christmas. And I was home & back in bed by 7:30am. Now who's crazy??

4. Hubbo cut son#2's hair. I was not a party to this of which I was totally thankful. It can be stressful & to be honest, I was glad I wasn't home when this went down. However, Hubbo seems to have discovered that son#2 will allow him to use scissors & remain unangered now but will NOT tolerate the clippers anymore. So with son#1 going to a salon now (and son#3 has a salon appointment Saturday too), and son#2 allowing us to use scissors, we have survived another stage of growing up!! Although, when it dried, there was just a touch of Friar Tuck there...

5. Both big boys retakes for school pictures turned out FANTASTIC! (for them) Now if they'll just let me pose them & get a shot for a Christmas photo.

6. Eureka! I think I've figured out how to start & possibly win the war on clutter in my house. I have a game plan people. Now if I can just get the energy to actually put it all into motion....

7. We got to watch a lot of movies this holiday on Hubbo's new tv/Christmas present. We have an old tv in the living room he had before we married & that son#2 pulled off the entertainment center once years ago. The sound is starting to go in it & the buttons on the front stick & won't work. You can't see dark things on it so we've finally entered the world of flat screens & digital tv. Whoo hoo! I had no idea it was so CLEAR! Now I don't have to stand next to the tv when something exciting happens.

8. I'm highly thankful that although Hubbo's company Christmas party was cancelled, he still got a Christmas bonus.

9. And I'm so thankful to my book club girls. We had such fun last night discussing our Christmas books and being giddy & silly while stuffing our faces. Then our crafts were fun & sooo cute! I needed that good, relaxing time & I'm so lucky to have met them.

10. I'm very thankful that Marilyn baked & brought her Rum Cake last night to book club. I really, really, really enjoyed it. And ask anybody, I don't even LIKE cake.:)

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-11-25T11:29:00.000-08:00

1. The holidays are here starting THIS week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Break out the Christmas tree, turkey & my grandmother's recipe for stuffing, full tummies & holiday music!

2. I got to go to a craft fair. A really, really big one. Two actually. And I haven't done that in a long time, but I had a blast with my friends. We ate, walked & talked and laughed a lot. I was very. very tired afterwards but boy was it worth it!

3. Sunday I spent the afternoon reminiscing with two high school friends. One I hadn't seen for 15 years. We had a blast discussing all the roads God has taken us down.

4. Everyone here is well! I never got the crud the kids & Hubbo had, but my head cold is finally shipping out and I'm feeling a lot better. Hooray!

5. I got most of my teacher gifts purchased & done! That decision to not make everything, may have cost me more money, but is SO much less stressful & this year, that's a luxury I'll gladly pay for.

6. My computer was on the fritz & is working much better & faster now. Special thanks goes to Hubbo & the IT brother-in-law. Amazing how once you get going fast, you can't stand slow connections. It seems like such an injustice.

7. I'm at that time of year again where I challenge myself & the kids to remember to put money in every red bell ringing pot we see between now & Christmas.

8. Every year my husband's company hands out to them a free turkey from Arkansas/Tyson foods because they are one of their customers. I'm very thankful we have a 15.3 pounder in the freezer.

9. I'm thankful I got some organizing done this past week. Small, baby steps-- but I'm gonna get back to the organizational nut I was before the third kid if it kills me!

10. I had lunch with my mom & a friend yesterday. We went for Chinese and we had a very good time. "Egg Drop Soup For the Soul".

Ten Things Thursday

2008-11-20T07:04:00.001-08:00

The fam has been rather ill here lately so Tuesday I couldn't post. Son#2 started with barfing Friday night. The baby began his round Saturday night, and by Tuesday morning, Hubbo was praying to the porcelin god as well. Son#1 started Tuesday night about the time we were set to go get his haircut. And yesterday I felt like I had a headcold. But thanks to Zicam, I'm feeling MUCH better today! (It tastes terrible, but it's worth it.)

1. Everyone is feeling much better here! Sick kids with both parents well is one thing, everyone sick with one parent down, you're outnumbered & even Lysol can't help you. It's been a long, long week.

2. I got good new color & haircut last Thursday from my friend Beth. Hubbo noticed & liked it so it has to be somewhat different for him to notice. Not to mention the body it's given my hair. I wake every morning looking like I have the Cowardly lion's mane. The word boufont comes to mind.

3. The kids retake pictures turned out GREAT! Son#1 didn't squinch his eyes up, and smiled normally & son#2 had his front teeth fixed & was considerably happier.

4. I bought my first Christmas presents last night! LET THE HOLIDAY SPIRIT BEGIN!!!!!!

5. I had a very fun time Saturday at my friend Carrie's house for her At Home party. I got to play with her son Mason and just enjoy good food & fun people.

6. Bare Escentuals make up had a TSV--Today's Special Value on QVC a couple of weeks ago & I missed it. Luckily I found it half priced through a friend!

7. I have a busy weekend ahead of me but I am mostly excited to see an old friend I went to high school with. He and I sang in choir, chorus & show choirs together from about 6th grade till we graduated. We spent a lot of time together & now he's a preacher in Florida. I can't wait to catch up on his life and where God has lead him.

8. A sweet friend that called to check on the sickies & me offering to stop by the store for us. She just had gall bladder surgery yet she's checking on us!

9. Being sick recently we've got to enjoy a lot of movies. Tropic Thunder, Get Smart, Zohan, The Happening, Hulk and Hellboy 2. As we were watching Get Smart last night, I remembered that as a kid I watched shows like Get Smart with my dad as my mom cooked & got dinner ready in the evenings. My dad worked from about 3-4am-4pm. So you can imagine he was in bed at 7pm most nights. I never felt cheated on time with him, but last night I realized, he & I watched a lot of tv shows in that dinner prep time. Rawhide, The Rifleman, Andy Griffin show, Get Smart, and of course, The Muppet Show. I remember rushing to set the table, my part of dinner and hurrying to go sit back in my dad's recliner with him to watch tv. I'm sure my mom could have used more help in the kitchen, but looking back, I sure am glad she didn't say so.

10. The holidays are here--I can feel it! Or at least I hope it's the holidays & not that virus....

Hidden Object Game

2008-11-13T13:55:00.000-08:00

When I couldn't find my brush for days and my scissors had been missing a week or more, and I'd search the entire house multiple times, it finally hit me. We'd been having great weather & my window had been open from morning to afternoon. I put that clue together with the fact that son#2 has been in a phase of throwing things lately--behind the couch, tv cabinet, under the stove & beds, etc. And guess who'd been enjoying the breeze in my room lately???
When I looked outside I could NOT believe what I saw. I had to have Hubbo take pictures. Coupled with the leaves that had been falling off the trees it was like a Hidden Object puzzle from the Highlights magazine!!!

Here are the things to look for: (remember you can click the picture to enlarge)

* a hairbrush

* a toy cell phone

* a toy that is yellow & purple

* an army green hat (that apparently is going to work well for my cousin in the Army should he need to hide)

* a sippy cup

* a gray sheep

* a red tag (toy)

* six socks (2 blue, 4 white--which would explain why every morning I kept having to get another pair out)

* a blue handled pair of scissors

* a small black mag flashlight/keychain

Whimsical Wednesday...Again

2008-11-12T09:17:00.000-08:00

I got up in a hurry this morning. I turned on the light in the bedroom for son#1 & son#2. As I hurry into the living room to the kitchen, I hear this from the dark.

Son#1: "Hold it right there!
I knew it was you. I could smell ya getting off the elevator! You was here last night too, wasn't ya?"

me: "Jackson is that you?"

son#1: " You was here...and you was smoochin' with my brother."

me: "WHAT!? What are you talking about?" (I keep making lunches.)

son#1: " Don't give me that. You been smoochin' with everybody! Snuffy, Al, Leo, Little Moe with the gimpy leg, Cheeks, Bony Bob, Cliff..."

me: "Jackson Allen, I do not have time for this, we're in a hurry this morning."

son#1: "All right, I believe you, but my Tommy gun don't! Get down on your knees and tell me you love me."

me: "Whatever, just get dressed."

son#1: "You gotta do better than that!"

me: "Fine, I love you." (I start to leave kitchen, back through living room to go get son#2 dressed)

son#1: "Maybe I'm off my hinges, but I believe ya. That's why I'm gonna let ya go. I'm gonna give you 'til the count of three to get ya lousy, lyin', low-down, four-flushin' carcass out my door! One... two...
(He makes all kinds of shooting noises.)

son#1: Three. Merry Christmas, ya filthy animal. (shoots) And a Happy New Year.

me from bedroom: "That's nice dear, now please get dressed."

***In case you don't remember that monologue is from the movie "Home Alone 2- Lost In New York" when Kevin (McCully Culkin) stays at the hotel & uses clips from the movie "Angels with Filthy Souls " to scare the hotel staff away. Obviously son#1 has been watching this a lot.***

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-11-11T11:14:00.000-08:00

Things have been slow & quiet around here and that's the way we like it. The weather is slowly changing to real crisp Autumn temps. And it's hard to believe we're into the double digit days of November already. Hopefully we won't have any more a/c days.
This week I'm thankful for:

1. I'm thankful for my husband who stayed home with my yesterday. Even thought it was raining all day, blowing sideways and COLD, we managed a good bit of fun. We're not alone often & we know how to make the most of it, even if it's freezing!

2. I'm thrilled to hear a best friend I never see anymore is engaged & happily planning a wedding. She's been waiting for this for so long I hope & pray she is as happy as I am.;) YEA for you Wendall!

3. I have an appointment to get my hair cut & colored Thursday morning. I'm getting excited thinking up things to do with it. Suggestions welcome!:) I'm just in the mood for something different. Plus I love hair appointments, nice girly time with some gossip on the side.

4. I had a blast Friday night at our crop. We were all low-key, less of us around, but we talked, got a lot done and I felt very statisfied with what I accomplished. I don't get to feel like I mark a lot of stuff off my "To Do" list very often, so feeling accomplishment is a rewarding thing.

5. Saturday I spent the day with my mom & family in Pryor. Our lunch was great and we had a marvelous time catching up. The kids were a little spunky further along in the day so it felt good to get home too where they could run & be free.

6. Son#3 is saying new words every day. I feel he understands SO much & is making huge progress with his verbal development. We are working puzzles, he is memorizing so much & really is taking things in and retaining the knowledge. Good signs for us!

7. Son#2 is staying at school & doing much better with his meltdowns & doing his work. He's back to being himself now. Thank the Lord for that one!

8. I'm very thankful for being invited to a Veterans day sale shopping/luncheon today with girls coming up from Joplin, but sadly it didn't work out. Oh well, there's always next time right??:)

9. I'm thankful to be back in my reading groove. Books are now piling up cause I can't read them fast enough!! "Twilight" is next!!!

10. And last, but by no means least, a huge THANK YOU to all the veterans, in my family and yours, who have served & are serving our country. Fighting for our freedom so we don't have to. Thank you all.

Wednesday Whimsey

2008-11-05T09:54:00.000-08:00

This was in my email today from son#1's teacher:

Fashion advice from a boy on the spectrum.

Last week I wore a striped blouse, and Jackson said, “Please don’t wear that shirt ever again.”

I said, "What do you mean?"

Jack told me,“It makes you look like a prisoner and that makes me sad.”

I almost popped a button I laughed so hard!

What a kid.
I guess it is his way of saying I like you.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-11-04T12:58:00.000-08:00

1. My right as a woman, to vote. 1920---that wasn't that long ago.

2. The historical significance of this election---either way.

3. Thank you to my book club gals for letting me not be the only one to NOT finish Little Women. I loved it as a child. I met some of best friends through that book & a discussion of which sister we were. But I think I must have had the abridged version. The minutiae was rich and the narrator (I was listening to an audio download) sounded as bored as I felt. I guess that can happen with the giant gap from the 1800's when it was written to todays 2008 media fed audience. How sad!

4. I used the treadmill yesterday! It made an awful racket though, and this morning I found a book one f the kids stuffed down inside the belt part. Sigh!

5. I'm thankful I get to meet with my girlfriends this Friday night & scrapbook. I love that time with them.

6. I also am thankful I get to have another family lunch this Saturday at a great hole-in-the-wall Mexican place. Can't wait for GOOD salsa!!

7. My arm is feeling good enough to knit again. I'm working on some hats for my cousin who graduated Julliard this year, and decided to go into the Army so he can play with the famous Army band. He plays trombone. He finished basic training last week & is now in VA so he needs something to keep that noggin warm.

8. I'm very pleased my son's pumpkin won first place in the 5th grade division of the decorating contest. I'm happy to report, our clone tropper pumpkin was a hit.

9. Halloween was a first for our family this year. We were ALL able to go out trick-or-treating together as a family. It was very fun, very warm & the only real drama was that son#1 lost his Indiana Jones whip. The nice couple who's house we were at offered to get a flashlight & help look. But I assured them, in the dead grass & leaves, we'd probably never find the brown piece of yarn.:)

10. And last, I am VERY thankful, to be a SAHM--stay-at-home-mom.

Five Things Wednesday

2008-10-29T08:49:00.001-07:00

Since I was so busy yesterday, here are five random things happening here I am thankful for from the past week:

1. Son#2 cut his finger on a greenbean can in the trash last Wed night. It was bad. The house looked like a crime scene, wouldn't stop bleeding for an hour & an ambulance came. I'm thankful he is better & I'm almost done with stain treating the huge pile of crime scene laundry.

2. I convinced my friend to leave me her letter stamps when she visited & I can't wait to go hog wild with them. Scrapbook pages, cards, Christmas cards--maybe you'll even see my use them to sign my name on checks. Although this would be rather interesting since they are about 2 inches high.

3. My house is clean after about a week of not being up to my standards. Shout out to my main man Hubbo who stepped up to the plate on that.

4. I have a new cell phone. All I care about is that it can be charged with it's charger & the battery lasts for more than a few hours. Oh and I have a QWERTY keyboard to text now.

5. The Swaim boys ALL have costumes and are ALL going trick-or-treating Friday. Son#1 is Indiana Jones, son#2 is G.I.Joe and the baby is going as Elmo. Pictures to follow.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-10-21T13:43:00.000-07:00

1. I'm thankful for the older Christian gentleman that stopped & found my son in the road today when he was able to defeat the gate & get out of the yard. I'm so thankful God watched out for him & that it wasn't a bad person that found him. Lord am I thankful about that. I'm thankful I didn't have a complete meltdown after the police & neighbors saw me pre-shower & freaking out. I'm thankful that the police didn't just deem me a bad mommy right there & take me away.

2. I'm thankful son#2's field trip got cancelled for tomorrow. *I know I sound like the Grinch--but one that would be exhausting.*

3. I'm thankful for my friends with true listening, friendship ears & hearts.

4. I'm thankful I got to have a meal alone with my husband for our anniversary Saturday & that my kids were wonderful for my mother.

5. I'm thankful I FINALLY get to get a new cell phone because mine hasn't kept a charge in the battery since June.

6. I'm thankful that I got a shower today. Mother to mother: 'nuff said.

7. I'm thankful Curious George is visiting our house this week & we're doing a photo op tonight with him. *more on that later*

8. I'm thankful Pizza Hut cooked our dinner last night.

9. I'm thankful that I think we can repair the computer cabinet door son#2 (a.k.a. Bam-Bam) ripped off the hinge last night in his hissy fit meltdown.

10. And I'm thankful my bestest girlfriends are coming up from Texas this weekend so we can PAR-TAY non-mommy style!!!!!!!!

Countdown

2008-10-17T08:30:00.000-07:00

TEN random things about me:

10. I can play piano, although not as well anymore.

9. When I feel nausous, I eat dill pickles.

8. I have a pretty good collection of baseball cards.

7. I love to ask questions & learn.

6. I drink unsweet tea just like my dad did.

5. I like having all boys & no girls. Honest. Sorry mom.

4. I have a scar on my face from falling on the fireplace when I was little.

3. I have been to several NFL games & two MLB games.

2. I like the smell of Coast soap. A lot.

1. I clean when I'm mad.

NINE ways to win my heart:

9. Look me in the eyes

8. Offer to get me something if I just sat down

7. Enjoy reading

6. Remember my birthday

5. Be willing to tell me when I need to be told something

4. Know how to have fun wherever you, whatever you're doing

3. Be willing to talk about ANYTHING

2. Make me laugh

1. Be a Godly man

EIGHT things I want to do before I die:

8. Have a weekly tennis game with my husband

7. Lead someone's life to Christ

6. Speak at a woman's conference on the role of faith & God in my life

5. Own my dream house equipped just the way we want it

4. Own my dream car--a yellow Jeep Cherokee Wagoneer

3. Swim in the ocean

2. Go to England & tour the countryside

1. Take a trip with my family

SEVEN ways to annoy me:

7. Roll your eyes

6. Be closed-minded

5. Have to talk about yourself a lot

4. Talk to me like I'm dumb

3. Hate dogs

2. Splash me or get me wet

1. LIE

SIX things I like:

6. dogs

5. home cookin

4. books

3. television (escape)

2. my friends

1. my kids learning

FIVE things I'm afraid of:

5. snakes

4. burglars/kidnappers

3. flying

2. cancer

1. Matt or the kids dying

FOUR favorite items in my room:

4. books

3. computer

2. yarn/knitting stuff

1. pillows

THREE things I do everyday:

3. have a Dr. Pepper

2. email my friends

1. kiss my family

TWO things I want to do right now:

2. knit

1. scrapbook

ONE person I really want to see right now:

1. my dad

Random Fun

2008-10-14T07:19:00.000-07:00

So instead of telling you things I'm thankful for today, I'm going to give you random fun things the kids have done or said to make you smile, snort & possibly laugh out loud.

** It was bathtime & the baby was already naked. I told him to go get his toys & put them in the tub. When I came back, this is how I found son#3.

This does nothing for my argument that not everyone in Oklahoma wears a cowboy hat.

** Son#1 came home with student of the month, which is picked out of the whole school. We were very proud of him & excited at his accomplishments. I was already thinking up scrapbook layouts in my head when I found something else in his take-home folder.

In case you can't read it, it's a little booklet on not getting your way & inside the story says:

"Mr. Peterman is handing out lollipops. Heather says she wants a red one. Mr. Peterman says that Rochelle got the last red lollipop."

Then you are supposed to draw and/or write what happens next.

And MY student of the month, draws Darth Vader killing Mr. Peterman & Heather says, "Thank you Vader!" --"Vader says no, Vader kills Peterman, Heather says thanks"

Good thing he got the Student of the Month award BEFORE this drawing. I expect the counselor to call me soon. I wonder if this fits in with the Twinkie defense?

** And last butt not least....this is a picture of son#3 being creative in his climbing endeavors again. Hubbo & I walk in the room to find this. We just stand there. Son#1 looks up from the computer & says with a completely straight face, " How did the baby's butt get that big crack?"

Son #1 was a little unerved when I explained his looked like that too.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-10-07T08:49:00.000-07:00

Here we are again! I have to say since starting this happy Tuesday thing, my weeks are flying by. Okay, here we go... I am thankful for:

1. Son#2 is feeling pretty darn good now! And he went to school yesterday and had a good day. He's even eating better which makes me happy. Now we are supposed to go in for a check-up on Wednesday, but honestly, I'm thinking they may be smoking something to think he'll lay in a chair & let them check out his mouth.

2. Book club last night was so fun. We had a great time discussing a good read called "The Ladies of Covington Send Their Love" by Joan Medlicott. *I will add a disclaimer here: I don't often read things that take major brain cells as many of mine were all lost in childbirth years ago.* I loved how this book is about ladies in their 60's still learning life lessons that I can learn from. We had a new "groupie" join us last night. She is from Venezula and is using this as one way to English. I applaud that intention & appreciate it a lot. Of course, she probably thinks we're a bunch of nutters since one lady introduced herself as, "Hi, I'm Judy. I guess that's Hoodie to you." hahahahahaha! I loved that because of course then I'm Hoolie!

3. I have a scrapbooking crop coming up this Friday night with no kids allowed! After son#2 being home most of last week & being bored all through the weekend, I'm ready to escape the asylum. And when I learned that the kids are out for Fall Break next Wed/Thurs/Fri, I signed up to crop Saturday too. Mommy gets a weekend pass from the looney bin!

4. My windows are open today with a nice crisp cool breeze blowing steadily. This is quite a feat since they are the oldest windows & VERY hard to get up. I can count on one hand how many times they've been open in the almost 6 years we've lived here. (Thought I wasn't gonna do a weather one didn't ya!?)

5. I am thankful for my sons' doctor & nurse. I know people who can't get same day appointments, can't get them to return phone calls and we are just so blessed to have caring, genuine people that will call us personally to check on the kids & really listen to us about what is going on. They truly "get" my kids. Thank you Cyndi & Gina!!!!

6. I went to a garage sale Saturday held inside at a retirement community. Everything you could fit into a sack was a dollar. I got two bags & a suitcase. The suitcase reminded me of an old one we had when I was a kid. It was marked $1, this old guy comes by & says I can have it for $.25. I tell him, it's fine, I can pay the dollar. Nope, $.25 he says. I mean, this money is all going to this retirement center, I wanted to spend & help out. So when I went to pay my $2.25 total, I gave her a $5 and told her to keep the change. That'll teach him!;)

7. I found the perfect costume that son#1 actually wanted for Halloween! Can't wait till I take it back tonight & get the pants someone ripped off the one I took home. He's already wanting to wear it day & night.

8. The crockpot is making dinner tonight. Whoo hoo!

9. Gas went down to $2.98 around these parts.

10. And this little guy is saying a new word every day, which I will in no way take for granted.

The Education of A Literal Thinker

2008-10-06T13:45:00.000-07:00

Son#1 is in 5th grade this year and came home with a stack of graded papers this weekend. As I weeded through them to find ones to keep, I came across a few that made me chuckle.

**On one paper he had to read a one paragraph story about a treehouse & answer questions afterwards. When asked, "What are two things you can pretend to be in a treehouse?"
son #1 answered: "Harrison Ford & a squirrel"
His teacher cross them out & put "pirate or explorer".

**Further down on the same page it asks, "What might you do with a friend in your treehouse?"
And son #1 answered: "Play video games"
His teacher put: "With a very long extension cord."

**On spelling homework the kids get to add in two words each week of their chosing. This particular week son#1 added in the words, father & son.On tests they have to pick one of the words & write out a sentence using the word. Son#1 had been practicing using BOTH words in a sentence. A Star Wars sentence. Something to do with Luke being Darth Vaders son and Vader being his father. When test time came, apparently he forgot which sentence he wanted to use. So he wrote: "Star Wars is next on t.v."
His teacher corrected it: "Luke you are my son!" I think we're rubbing off on her.

**There was a worksheet where you answered questions about your community. Whether or not you lived near an ocean, a big city or small town, etc.
Here are a couple of questions & answers from son#1:

"What fun things are there to do in your community?"
Son#1: "golfing" He's never golfed except on the Wii!

"How do you get to school each day?"
Son#1: "Bush (the name of his bus shuttle--they each have a Presidential name)

And my favorite:
"Name three things you think make a community a good place to live."
Son#1: "Arrowhead (his school), playground & Arby's "

**One spelling test he states his two extra words as "Mario & Luigi".

Sometimes even we forget how literal his mind is and how often he's consumed with his fun things in his mind. Like this exchange this morning:

me: "Just a second hon, I have to finish this first."

son#1: "Actually a second is a very short amount of time. I don't think you can finish that in a second."

me: "*sigh*"

Wednesday

2008-10-02T06:48:00.000-07:00

Wednesday morning at 5am Hubbo & I got up, dressed & ready for taking son#2 to the surgery center to see the dentist. He did well & wasn't freaked out or anything. They didn't make him put the bracelet on, they decided they could do that after he was out. Along with the IV. They didn't even make him change into a gown. He went back in what he wore there. The nurses were flexible once again, and son#2 didn't even mind the pre-op room we were waiting in. We weighed him which took some doing. Hubbo holding him up, me hold his feet on the scale. Son#2 came in at a whopping 110lbs!!

The anesthesiologist worried me some. He was a small man. So small I think I could take him. All I could think was, "THIS is the man that's supposed to hold the gas mask to my son's face?!" I was pretty sure son#2 could snap this man in half if he wanted to.

One of the things about having Autistic children is, you can peg people pretty quickly.
I can sum up someone on the phone, in person or walking by, on how they are viewing my child & their Autism. This doctor wasn't hearing us. He wasn't listening *in that special way wives mean when referring to their husbands* when I told him about son#2 pulling a large television down onto his leg and breaking it at age 2. And how it took a double dose of morphine to knock him out to set the leg. And even then, when the intern picked up his leg to set it, son#2 sat up & looked him. Then laid back down. That intern was freaked out.

I could just tell this guy wasn't going to believe me about how strong son#2 is. Well, he did LATER. He could see son#2 acting pleasant and personable. So what if he couldn't talk? Remember those cute, tiny, little dinosaurs on Jurassic Park? All cute, cocking their head to the side, almost smiling at you and then BAM! They all jump all over you wanting to eat you like a t-bone steak! That's son#2 if you hold him down. And that's the path this thing was traveling down, so I just waited.

The anesthesiologist was really bent on trying to get the "happy juice" down son#2. We tried cherry first, in a syringe. He was curious, but wouldn't go for it. Apparently he wasn't that hungry. I accidentally had some on my finger and licked it. (cooking habit) Then the doctor insisted we try another * this is where the nurse & I look at each other & roll our eyes like wives do about husbands when they aren't looking* relaxing cocktail, and this one was grape. Hubbo tasted the grape to see if it was horrible. We both agreed, it had a definite medicinal taste & a metallic after taste like you'd been licking a penny for 20 minutes. No wonder kids hate that stuff. That takes the happy out of it for sure.

Finally we were ready to go back & this is where Hubbo donned his surgical cap (blackmail picture was taken) and walked son#2 back to the OR. I waited for screams but didn't hear any. In my head I played out the dinosaurs eating the anesthesiologist, smiled & made my way to the waiting room. Hubbo's account is that son#2 was fine with being back there, even got on the gurney. Then they all jumped on him like on the Crocodile Hunter takes down a croc. One nurse had an arm (she ended up getting pinched), the dentist had one leg, another nurse had another leg and then Hubbo had one arm & was trying to help hold son#2's head still for the anesthesiologist. It took one full minute *really think about how long that would seem* before son#2 was under. Even then as they all took a step back to breathe, the anesthesiologist asked that they not leave the room yet, son#2 still felt tense. Ahem.;)

It took almost three hours. After eight years of non-brushing and no dental visits, son#2 had a lot of work that needed to be done. He had 5 teeth pulled. Two were abscess & puss filled. (that should give you an idea of his pain tolerance, another topic people tend not to believe me on)The rest they pulled were decayed. Then he had 8 fillings and 4 crowns. The dentist also fixed son#2's two front teeth. He no longer looks like Bunnicula. They did some cleaning, but I think they were all tired and it had taken longer than they thought it would.

We did convince the two male nurses we had in recovery to take the IV out of his foot (another good thought planned out by our awesome team) & the bracelet off before he woke up & started ripping at them. When son#2 started coming around he started screeching. We hurried him (this really involved Hubbo carrying him) out to the car when he could sit up because we knew the other people there in recovery wouldn't want to be listening to that. He was very cranky when home. I got the impression he wanted us to be quiet. He wanted to sleep, yet wouldn't let himself. Followed Hubbo around & sat with him everywhere he went. And just growled at us every so often. Then he'd kiss us. He maybe napped 30-45 min. But he didn't sleep the rest of the day. He was very, very mellow. Dr. Evan called to check on the "little" guy and complimented Hubbo on his agility in the OR with keeping son#2's hand from attacking as well as being able to keep the head still for the gas mask. We love our Dr. Evan---what a good Christian, caring man. God has called him to great things and we've been blessed to have him in our boys lives with his patience, and understanding.

Thursday son#2 got up at 3am, 4am & then stayed up at 6am. Between that & the previous day's roll call at 5am, we were beat. Son#2 did not have a good Thursday. He melted down more of the day than not. I think he was very frustrated at not being able to eat at the Michael Phelps pace he's used to. But today was much, much better. He's healing & was able to eat much more reasonable things today. Which just like in animals, means my carnivore is on the way to recovery.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-09-30T13:07:00.000-07:00

Apparently I'm getting old, because once again, I'll start with the weather.

1. I am VERY thankful today is not 88 degrees like yesterday. Today is said to be TEN whole degrees cooler.

2. I just mailed off a whole bunch of paperwork that took me a week or so to get together, filled out & ready to mail off for/about the kiddos. I love having paperwork monkeys off my back!!!!

3. Son#3, my mom & I went for Chinese for lunch. I don't get to eat out with my mom often, or eat Chinese so it was nice. Not to mention an extra shout out for excellent behavior from son#3.
(Except when he double slapped my face in Ulta.)

4. Fundraising for sons#1 and #2--OVAH!!!! (read: over) Halleluah! They double teamed me this year & both schools sent them home at the same time.

5. I'm thankful for my neighbor Jennifer who brought over some extra Rib Crib take out they couldn't use. That's our dinner tonight folks & what makes it so fantastic is, I didn't have to cook it!!! Add chips...limeades....POOF--instant meal!

6. Our bus drivers & helpers. They are SO wonderful with our kids and sweet to them. The older vets that drive son#2's bus want updates this week after son#2 goes to dental surgery tomorrow morning. They love him so much. We're blessed to have such good people looking after our kiddos when they aren't with us.

7. One of my knitted hat pictures on Ravelry.com got chosen to be THE picture they show with that pattern as the example. It's not some big deal really, but in my mind, it was a lot flattering.

8. I'm thankful for meeting up with two friends last Friday night that I don't normally scrapbook with. One was there on my invitation, the other by chance. It was a fun suprise.

9. Okay, this ones a tad weird I know, but I'm very happy with a recent purchase of a cast iron dutch oven. I LOVE this thing. I'm using it for anything & everything lately. I can do meats in it & they don't splatter up on me like with a cast iron skillet. I have to love it since I'm washing it by hand & drying it as soon as I'm done with it. Thank you Paula Deen for this great investment idea for my kitchen.

10. Another strange thank you....Friday morning last week after the trashmen came (of course), I found someone had left a "present" on my sidewalk. A bag from potatos. With some rotten, juicy ones in the bottom. Have you ever seen that before? Ever smelled it?? Stinks to HIGH HEAVEN I kid you not! Like feet, throw-up & BO all in the same area. I was at a loss. What could I do with it? Not leave it on the sidewalk, and for sure not put it in the garbage can in the garage for the next 4 days. So I ended up leaving it outside next to the side of the house. I was rather embarrssed yesterday when the lawn guy saw it. Well, today was trash day. As soon as I got up this morning, my mission was to make sure hubbo did NOT forget to take that little prize to the curb. He didn't, and the potato poison potion is gone! Horray!!!

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-09-23T11:14:00.000-07:00

Well, here we are again!

1. Just spent the weekend in Branson, had a blast with my brother & sister-in-law & kiddos. We did lots of shopping, eating, scrapbooking & mostly laughing.

2. Son#1 had school pictures today, son#2 has them tomorrow. Since they were little, they won't sit for portraits at professional places. So I really enjoy picture day at school, no matter how crazy it turns out.

3. Hubbo cleaned out some seriously messy places this weekend while I was gone. THAT was quite the turn-on to an old married lady.

4. My laundry is caught up--need I say more?

5. I get to scrapbook again this Friday with my peeps. I can't wait!! I even have a new bag!

6. I had messed up with my knitting before I left for my trip but I fixed it last night. That feels good. Like I can start back up again. I'm using Malabrigo Worsted in a butter yellow.

7. I'm thankful we're almost caught up on Smallville episodes. What a fun series that I didn't think I'd like but do! It's fun to escape into a TV show isn't it?

8. Son#2 seems to be behaving better & not screaming at us in huge fits of anger we can't understand. Hopefully he will feel better after being to the dentist Oct. 1st.

9. Son#3 is trying SO hard to use real words. He's babbled for awhile & you get a real word now and again. But now, he's really throwing out word syllables in context. We see the light ahead!

10. And I'm thankful for my blog being nominated to the "I Love Your Blog Award"!
Now I must post who threw me this nod--->Longhorn Diva
and now I must nominate at least four others.

My college friend Danna was the first to jump to mind...she is SO genuine you just hear the happiness in her life through her words. I find her stories of three girls VERY entertaining since I just know boy stories.

Shirley is always crazy busy with some project. I envy her energy & am always impressed with what she creates every time.

Sue, who not only knits, but sews, does jewelry designs and really just wows me with her craft accomplishments over in jolly old England.

Lynne who gets more garmet knitting done than anyone I know & shares the same decorating sense that I have.

And last but not least Abigail. I've never seen such a well rounded person who is so happily blessed and says so often. She has previously served in the Navy and now entertains us troops of knitters with her stories and wonderful finished projects.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-09-16T11:58:00.000-07:00

1. Such good weather, we're not having to use the air conditioning today. Can Fall be far away?! Shhh....let me dream.

2. #3 son and his exceptional sleeping abilities. I do not in any way take for granted he has from the begining been & still is, a fantastic sleeper for me. Just lay him down, POOF--he's out. For hours. This allows me to be selfishly sitting here doing what I want rather than emptying the dishwasher like I probably should be.

3. That Hubbo's t-shirt contest voting is OVER! Dennis Miller picked the winner last night and all will be revealed in the next couple of weeks where I assume the winning tee will be available for purchase.

4. My upcoming trip by myself to go see Hubbo's sister & her family in Branson this weekend. I think 4 hours in the car by myself with my ABBA cd & other 80's music is sounding mighty fun.

5. Because of Prilosec, I can enjoy a nice, fat PBJ for lunch again.

6. Online Hobby Lobby coupons for 40% off one item so I can get some scrapping stuff before my trip.

7. I'm thankful for knowing what I'm cooking for dinner tonight already. Chicken Fried Rice-->
http://www.tasteofhome.com/Recipes/Fried-Rice-with-Chicken

8. My foot does not hurt & is healing the fastest it's ever healed.

9. Son#1 was "Student of the Day" yesterday and very pleased with himself that he remembered to used good manners all day.

10. A husband that truly "gets" me.

The Dentist & Beetlejuice

2008-09-11T13:34:00.000-07:00

We had a first here at our house this past Wednesday. We took son#1 to the dentist. And because of his sensory issues he would not ever allow a dentist to just LOOK in his mouth. Much less clean his teeth, poke around etc. He doesn't even allow us to wiggle teeth. So because of this we were at a surgery outpatient center Wednesday morning at 6am. Wowee, that's early!

Son#1 did well and got up and insisted on Teddy accompaning us as well as his Little Critter book, "Just Going to the Dentist". He said he wanted the nurses & doctor to have it for instructions. I had my knitting bag, recent People magazine and some coffee to wake my body up. We got straight in & son#1 was so brave! He put on his gown, kept his Cars pajama pants on. Used a heated blanket as a cape while drinking part of the "happy juice" provided by one of the nicest nurses ever. He got half down before he started gagging. After fasting since 8:30pm the night before, his empty tummy doesn't like sweet things first. Just like his mama.

The dentist/doctor came out to meet us and go over what his plan was. He was wonderfully helpful and we appreciated he wasn't going in to take everything & anything. Dr. Evan was so awesome & kid friendly in his red scrub pants & X-Men scrub top. He put son#1 at ease quickly although he was a good six foot four or better. Son#1 pointed out his book he brought and how if the dentist wanted to, son#1 would let him borrow it for instructions of what was to be done while son#1 slept. Dr. Evan was very agreeable and even said he loved books and had been brushing up on his the night before.

After the anesthiesiologist came in and gave son#1 an idea of the Darth Vader mask, we waited while he walked back by himself to the OR. He was so brave & I could tell the staff was very impressed and was probably expecting more of a fuss. I went off to the waiting room and Hubbo took off to go get son#2 up, dressed, fed and ready for the school bus. My mom had come the night before to stay the night so when we left someone here for #2 & #3. As soon as Hubbo had #2 gone and #3 up and dressed, he came back. But son#1's procedure didn't take as long as we'd thought so he just missed talking to the doctor/dentist. While waiting out front in the waiting room I was knitting and watching the news an older gentleman sat down beside me. We discussed some politics and got around to my son and how's not your typical child. Ironically, this gentleman's wife teaches D1, a class before kindergarten for developmentally delayed kids. She works in a metro area town and he drives buses for special needs kids in that town also. He was asking me all kinds of questions, and then right before he left, he said thank you. "Thank you for sharing your story of your children. I hope I didn't get too personal, but my daugthers son is not progressing as well with things and my wife & I have questioned it for awhile & didn't know what to say to my daughter. Thank you." I think my lesson I learned here is, you just never know who God will place in your waiting room for chit chat so make it worthy. He does so well placing people who need each other together doesn't he?

Son#1 came out of everything just fine! We were so so very proud of him. The dentist only had to pull 6 teeth and all were wiggly or had one waiting to come in. As we thought, his gums were sore and a problem, but he gave us a prescription for mouthwash to help that. (and it's already so much better!) He told us his jaw may be sore a bit from keeping his mouth open. Or he might need chapstick for a week. And they cleaned his teeth too. First time in 10 years...imagine that. Soft foods for the first few days & oh yeah, he has foam gel in the holes where he pulled the teeth to prevent dry socket and things getting in there while it heals. The gel can dissolve or fall out, no harm or big deal. Scared me the first time I saw one of those puppies come out though. I thought son#1 had some huge sinus problem or swallowed a bug larve!

I called his regular doctor when we got home and got topical rub-on meds for pain and throwing up called in. And son#1 did throw up by the time we got home poor kid. Dr. Evan called that night from home to check on him. What a nice man! We were so blessed. Son#1 slept a lot and by the next day, he was MUCH better & asking to play video games. There was a little problem finding soft foods without corners he'd eat since he's not your typical mac & cheese or jello kid. But he's back at school today and doing so well. We are so thankful for everyone's prayers and well wishes.
Because we were home with son#1 by 9:30am, and Hubbo would be home the rest of the day, I decided to bump my doctor appointment up to that same day. So at 2pm, off to the foot doctor I went. To have him work on the bottom of my right foot AGAIN--for the third time. I have a plantar wart. Well, actually FIVE. Apparently if you don't get them taken care of, like I didn't 8 yrs ago, they spread. Lovely. He's already seen me two other times, and it was so painful, Hubbo had to stay home at times because I couldn't walk for the first day. So I went back again, ready to beg this doctor not to do anymore because I couldn't afford to be off my feet any longer with my kids needing me the way they do. No dice. He sharpened the wooded end of a medicinal Q-Tip and applied more acid from a yep, you guessed it by the title...a BEETLE. Here is how they do it, and apparently, my old man foot doctor is a rouge according to this information:

"Cantharidin acid. Doctors and healers have used cantharidin — a substance extracted from the blister beetle — to treat warts for centuries. Today, this therapy is sometimes paired with salicylic acid. Your doctor paints this beetle juice onto your wart and covers it with clear tape. The application is painless, but it causes the skin under the wart to blister, lifting the wart off the skin. Your doctor can then clip away the dead part of the wart in about a week. However, some doctors are hesitant to use cantharidin because it's not approved by the Food and Drug Administration for the treatment of warts. "

So the foot doctor is seeing me every two weeks & widdling down the skin till the warts are gone. Guess I should have gotten it taken care of 8 years ago huh? The good news is that this time I convinced him to apply even less acid, so it really did hurt less & although it was pretty painful when I walked, I was at least able to walk this time. Hopefully, this is the last time.

And here is where I want to correct this in case any of you have to have this done. Yes, it is painless when he applies this beetlejuice. However, and this is a BIG, WHOMPING HOWEVER,

later that same day, expect it to hurt. First it burns. Then it starts itching. Then the blisterS start. For me, I get a blood blister the size of a pencil eraser & two other regular blisters slightly smaller than dimes. Try walking on THAT. No matter which side of your foot you try to walk on or the heel, you still pull or pinch those blisters. Fun, fun.

So now, the family is healed & back to life as we call normal, walking & eating. Until October 1st, when son#2 goes in to the same OR/dentist.....stay tuned for those details. I'm betting their whoppers compared to son#1.

Ten Things Tuesday

2008-09-09T10:48:00.000-07:00

I'm stealing a wonderful idea from my good friend Danna--Ten Things Tuesdays! Here are ten things I'm thankful for today.

1. A cloudy, cool pre-fall day. That means less humidity too which is always nice.

2. For some time to myself this morning before the chaos of the next few days begins. (more to blog on that later)

3. Someone who can watch the baby for me tomorrow. (my mom)

4. My great book club that I saw last night. We had a few people drop out & say our books were "trite". Seems they obviously can't be intellectually stimulated by anything with a happy ending. That's fine, I like us just the way we are!

5. I'm thankful I get to scrapbook this Friday night. Horray for more girl time!

6. Wal-Greens pharmacy--Pharmacist Bob makes my life so much easier.

7. That I got to meet up with family this weekend I don't see often enough & we had a nice, happy, long lunch together.

8. My friend Teresa that is motivating me to get back in shape. She has quite a road ahead of her.

9. My neighbors that are sweet Christian people who look out for us.

10. That we can pay someone else to mow & edge the lawn. I do NOT miss yard work.

VOTE FOR HUBBO!!!!!

2008-09-02T13:55:00.000-07:00

Hubbo, listens online to Dennis Miller's radio show. You might remember Dennis Miller from the funnier years of Saturday Night Live. Well, Dennis Miller had a t-shirt contest for listeners to submit ideas. Hubbo submitted three ideas, and they picked all three!!!

However, they decided to take the easy way out & post all the t-shirt ideas they liked online for people to vote on.

Hubbo's designs are, the wagon one, the Radio Rennesance/Michaelangelo of Dennis Miller (gold/yellow) and the Latin text one. You may not get the humor, Hubbo used things Dennis Miller says all the time as the base of the idea so don't worry if you don't get it or think it's funny. JUST VOTE!!!!! And he prefers you vote for the yellow one or wagon one, in that order.:) Page #3 if the link doesn't work.

http://www.dennismillerradio.com/tshirtcontest?action=listImages&ind=2

They say one vote per hour, however Hubbo just voted three times in one hour so go ROCK THE VOTE PLEASE!!!!!!!! Every day until the voting is closed. Please!

Don't Come, Don't Call, Don't Peek!

2008-08-13T08:34:00.000-07:00

It's the first day of school! I've made it! And I guess more importantly, the kids survived as well.
I guess I should fill you in on some of the more exciting moments of the summer so you don't feel left out & can empathize with why today, I would like to be left completely alone.

Summer school went beautifully. #2 son did have a couple of hiccups & need to be picked up before the half day was out. But after MUCH, MUCH medicine adjustment, I think he is where he needs to be. It was at the begining of July when he developed a tic one morning. He started tipping his head to the side & swiping his cheek on his shirt. At first this seemed like nothing. Then he kept doing it, ALL day long. For some reason, this unerved me. I guess it was the proverbial straw breaking the camels back. Just one more thing this child does NOT need going on. Just one more thing for people to stare at. And just one more thing to go see a doctor about & try not to panic. We traveled all the way to Claremore & saw our favorite & best doctor. She was convinced this was not a tic but a nerve problem in the brain from prolonged use of his meds. It can become permanent so I guess Mommy had good reason to panic. We started immedietly weaning him off his meds he had been on for 2+ years. To say we were nervous was an understatement. But being that son #2 takes an anti-psychotic drug, you can't just stop. We've seen the Law & Order specials on what happens when you do that.

About the time we got down to one dose a day, he started acting out. Worse than earlier in the summer. It reminded us of when we first started him on the meds. So back up we went to two doses. The doctor did not think this was a level of dosing that should cause anymore of the side effects. Of course, this means messing with the dosing at the pharmacy and with the dreaded school nurse. We won't speak of her anymore now.

Son#1 had a good summer. He was happy with the three weeks between summer school & the regular school year starting. The computer & Wii saw lots of action. And he went to VBS at church as well. He made strides this year. Last July he wouldn't stay & watch dramatime with the kids dressed up acting out the Bible story. He was scared. This year, he stayed & even seems to have developed a crush on one of the teen girls in dramatime. Son#1 also found a girl favorite on the tv show, "I Survived a Japanese Game Show" too. Cathy. He would spell her name to me each week the show was about to come on. He practically cried when she was kicked off. I'm seeing a pattern here that he likes brunettes.

Son#2's summer consisted of meltdowns & taking his pull-up off & running around naked. My back aches from bending over to put his pull-up back on him for the millionth time a day! It is good news because this means he's figured out he doesn't want poo on him or to be wet. However, the idea of how on earth I'm gonna potty train this somewhat gentle giant, is a little daunting. It does NOT help, that son#3 has decided this summer to copy everything his peapod (son#2) does. They DO look hilarious running around the house naked looking like Jolly Green Giant & Sprout though.

Yesterday at meet the teacher I went to son#2's school and left him home. One of his friends, Mario was there with his mother. Lovely woman. She's fiesty, I like that. She mentioned one day she & her husband were sitting watching tv when pink stuff kept falling on them. And they heard scurring around up above. Thinking they had a rodent, they went to look in the attic. Mario was up there running across beams & hiding in the corner. Lucky he didn't fall through the part that wasn't floored. Her story reminded me of how we couldn't find son#2 one time. Searched everywhere & I was so worried and ready to go run around outside searching. We found him in the garage, sitting in the car.

Mario came right up to me & gave me kisses & hugs. His mother was worried, I told her I was used to it, son#2 does it as well. Stares into your eyes & kisses you. Of course, these boys ARE getting rather tall, and in 3rd grade now. But I didn't mind. Mario always smells SO yummy and like me, loves chapstick. He apparently doesn't like to be wet either because she said on a 7 hr trip to Austin, TX this summer, Mario did not pee his pull-up. Wow these kids are stubborn.

This summer son#2 has been making this noise we can't figure out. Remember that old beer commercial where the guys all called each other saying "Whazzzz uppp"?? Well, it's drawn out like that & sounds like "DUUUUUDE". At his school yesterday I figured out Mario was saying this too. And it turns out, son#2's girlfriend Emma, started this sound "BA-DOOOO" when she wanted to play ball. Lightbulb moment. I was so impressed that the kids were copying each other! This is a great sign!

Well, I apologize for not blogging this summer. I tried to save my energy to cook lunch & dinner. The heat got bad in the last part of July & August so I was conserving my strength. Plus a bored son#2, means the house is trashed each & every day. My blood pressure meds were making me VERY tired & out of it. And the best husband in all the kingdom did all our laundry & dishes. What a prince! But now, I'm on a new med, back to normal & we're still house hunting. Day by day. And today people, I'm in hiding. When the baby goes down to nap, I will actually be alone in my house for the first time since May. Tears may be shed.

There was a furniture store in the town I grew up in that would have a sale ever so often. And their commercial was, "Don't come, don't call, don't peek!" So I'm telling you, please, give me just this one day left to myself, and I'll be a new person tomorrow.

Best Friends

2008-06-09T13:07:00.001-07:00

This past week I took my annual trip to spend some girl time away from my house. The Girl trip. I traveled with a friend from here where I live, and we met up with two of my friends from college who live in Dallas, Texas. There is a scrapbook convention in Arlington that we use as an excuse to get together & let our hair down. It really started as the main reason we went once a year. As time has gone on though, I notice we get less & less pages done.

We have a lot in common with each other that keeps us connected in many other ways besides our hobbies. Two of the four of us, have policemen for husbands. It's not an easy job being the worrier or the parent that's home during the regular hours of the day. Two of us have children that have some special needs. We get what it's like to have your kid not understood by people. Three of us went to college together and all four of us attend the same denomination of church. We have many connections and even though we have seperate lives and families, we always make the time for each other, this one time a year.

Our husbands and families take off work and time out of their own lives, to help us go have a good time. It's an important time for us all. Sometimes we think we can't make the time, the money (gas ain't cheap folks!) or get in the right frame of mind to relax & enjoy it. But we always do. It doesn't take long till we're smiling constantly, laughing till we ache and really hating how time moves so swiftly. Anyone begruding a mother a good time away from her family for an extended period, listen up. If that woman that folds your laundry, fixes you food and cleans up your children accidents doesn't get time away, she can't appreciate you all. She also can't stay sane. It's a proven fact. That woman will take cranky to a degree you didn't know it could see if you don't let her take some time that is purely for herself.

That means no picking up your dry cleaning on the way home, only call if you HAVE to ask her something and please do NOT ask her when she's coming back home. That will only drive her to stay away longer. There's being missed, and then there's breathing room. Let her have her space. Let her live again--like before she had children and responsibilities.
That's the whole point of our trip. We do NOT cut anyone's food up, we do NOT dress anyone but ourselves and we do NOT go to the bathroom with anyone else in the room either. I bet this is sounding very appealing to some of you out there.

My friends & I had a great time. We ate out at many places, shopped till our legs were so tired we had to sit down. Took many silly pictures, and we just had a really good time. We shared toothpaste, makeup, hairbrushes and even shoes. We stay up late talking about old times, old friends or just silly times we never told each other about before. Our topics rarely turn towards children or husbands. We try very hard to not talk about the responsibility "stuff" in our everyday lives. There's plenty of that during the year. It's all about us doing things we don't normally get to do for ourselves, saying things we don't normally get to say out loud, being around people our own age longer than normal and spending money on things that only matter to us. Together like this, we get silly, we say hilarious things to make the others laugh out loud, maybe even snort a drink out their nose and we are NEVER on our best behavior. In fact, the waiters usually think we've been drinking because we laugh so much & have so many crazy stories to explain our behavior.

What I treasured most this year was I didn't have to scarf down my food in a wolfish manner to try and keep up with when son#2 would be done eating. I didn't wipe anyone's butt other than my own and no one stuck their hand under the door while I was in the bathroom. Although, there was a camera that tried to worm it's way into my dressing room at the mall. When you're a mommy there are reigns on you like a horse. When you get time away, truly away from responsibility, you can relax in a totally different way that allows the inner Girl a way out. There are many times in every day life when you tell that Girl inside no. The Girl is the one that wants the pretty things, nice clothes, time away or to just do what SHE wants that day instead of what HAS to be done. And she wants to say whatever she's thinking without worring about little listening ears. But because your children or your family needs to do something else with that money or that time, she is rarely given a leash of true freedom to come out & play. There are deadlines for work, soccer games and meals to plan, buy for and fix. Laundry always calls to be folded and somehow there are more commitments than you remember commiting to. That inner Girl remembers what it was like when she was younger and has so many fewer responsibilities. She steps up and does what she needs to do. If I told you of how much my friends I have to deal with in every day life, you just might not believe me. That's why it's so important to come together. We know with each other, maybe not any other people, we can totally be ourselves. Let it all hang out I guess you could say. Total acceptance of all flaws, mistakes and ramblings.

In life you mostly have different friends for different areas of your life that you might need them. And that's why this group of friends I meet up with are THE best. The best means, they can cover me in ANY of those life situations that come up, even if we haven't spoken in 3 months, and STILL be the person I have the most fun with.

The good times of this year, might last us till next year, but I'm thinking we're getting greedy and may need a 6 month fun trip. See? That Girl, she's not always easy to squash back down when you've let her out all bra-less and free. She has a hard time readjusting back to real life.

The End of the School Year

2008-05-21T06:37:00.001-07:00

It's here! Finally the end of the school year has come. My children attend ESY (extended school year) which allows them to stay in their routine & there's also less regression when school starts back up again. And I'll be honest, while other moms are looking forward to sleeping in during the summer, I don't mind getting up early to see them off to school. It may just be half a day, but that's half a day of freedom and less whinning. And let's face it, even Martha Stewart would agree, less whinning is a "good thing".

The end of school brought home a lot of extra papers the teachers were cleaning out & of course home-made Mother's day gifts. My favorite I don't mind saying is long stemmed lillies made with a cutout of son#2's hand & green pipe cleaners. PRICELESS! I have them in a marble vase. They are precious. Son #1 made me something of clay. I must say I don't know what I'll do with it yet, so for now it's sits on the treadmill. It's a nest with A LOT of little eggs in it. So picture hardened clay shallow bowl, and lots of tiny balls of hard clay. I can guess since with clay & playdough there are sensory issues with my son, that this was his way of making something he had to, in a hurry. What's faster than a bowl & some little balls of clay? So, I guess I'll put it next to the other TWO I have from previous years. Pretty soon, I'll have to get a family of birds to sit in them so people know what they are & don't mistake them for ashtrays.

And for the last little chuckle, I thought I'd share son#1's journal entries for April & May since you all seemed to like them before.

If I went the desert I would see..... "some birds. I would see a lot of sand."

When I loose a tooth..."at the dentist the tooth fairy gets me a new Lego Star Wars game." (can you tell who has a loose tooth at our house??)

I use a computer for..."brainpop jr."

My favorite PE activity is..."scooters. They go fast."

I stay strong by eating..."cheese ritz. I also eat Yoplait."

The biggest thing I've ever seen is..."Arrowhead (his school). It has so many rooms."

I'd like to become famous for..."Lord Vader , from Star Wars."

The last time I cried was..."when there wasn't Lego Star Wars for Windows."

My favorite assemble at school this year was..."about the earth."

The librarian at my school..."showed how to make strawberry ice cream."

If I ever got lost..."I call 911."

If I could build a robot..."he will be like Moby . (on Brainpop Jr.)

An animal I know a lot about is..."a panda. Pandas are cute."

Rollercoasters are..."cool." (my son has NEVER been on a rollercoaster)

When I go to the dentist..."she looks in my mouth."

A fun outdoor activity is..."Jedi Academy." (computer game)

If I were one inch tall..."I would be like an ant."

I want to take a field trip to..."my getto." (Apparently someone's been watching MTV)

At the library I..."can read."

I don't scream whenever I see...(he added DON'T) "ants."

Now I have to go & shower. My kids are gone to school for half a day and after a full day with all three of them yesterday, I'm a mess. Half days are good, but it's sort of like the start of the crab fishing season on the tv show "Deadliest Catch". I have to hurry to meet my quota of things to get done before time runs out and they come home.

Heaven & How You Get There

2008-05-06T07:25:00.000-07:00

Son #1 came home from school yesterday in a rather brooding mood. I could tell something was up but with the pitch of his voice I decided to tread lightly. He had a wrapped "present". I asked who this was for, after much protest & whinning I won't subject you to, he allowed me to put it up on top of the tv cabinet so the brothers couldn't get it. Then I sat down to try & figure out what he was thinking about to make him so quiet & frustrated. He sat at the computer not playing it, but staring off at the tv. But I could tell by his fixed stare, he wasn't really paying it any attention. I sat down across from him.

me: "What are you thinking about babe?"

son#1: "Well, I don't want to grow up and be old."

me: "Okay"

son#1: "When you're 80 years old you die."

me: "Some people live to be 90 & 100 years old too."

son#1: "They do?"

me: "Yep."

son#1: "Well, I'm NOT going to heaven."

me: "Okay, but in heaven you don't have to sleep or eat, you just play & you're with God."

son#1: "Well, I'm not going because Papa never came back from there."

me-quietly: "That's right, you don't come back."

son#1: "Well, I'm not going then. I'm going to stay with the Swaims forever." (pause) What happens when you die?"

me: "You mean to your body? After you die, we have a funeral for your body. But you have a spirit inside you that tells you right & wrong, and when you die that spirit goes to heaven to live with God."

son#1: "Well, I'm NOT going. (pause) When is he going to ask me if I want to go so I can tell him no?"

me (chuckle): "Well, he doesn't ask you like that. He asks you to be baptized, which is where you hold your nose & go under the water & come right back up. And he asks you to believe that Jesus was God's son.
See, God had a son, like you're my son. And God's son's name was Jesus. And Jesus died like Papa died. After he died, God took Jesus to live with him in heaven. One day Jesus will come back, then all the dead people will live again and he'll take us all to go be in heaven with God. So you'll see Papa then."

son#1: (processing) "Well, I think Papa misses being here and playing his Hoyle games."(computer games)

me: "I bet he does too baby. I bet he misses you like you miss him. (pause) You know how Matt is your daddy and I'm your mommy? Well, Papa was MY daddy. And I miss him very much too. So it's okay for you to miss him and be sad about that because I get sad too."

son#1: "Yeah. (pause for processing & recognition starts to dawn on him) So Nana is your mommy?"

me: "Yep."

son#1: "She not dead."

me: "Nope, she's not."

son#1 smiles "Yeah. (pause) Well I still think heaven is evil."

me (sigh): "No honey, that's hell. We'll talk about that a different day."

**I had no idea how many times we say "well"--so I apologize, but it is how son#1 starts most sentences.

A Peek Into Our World-Sensory Issues 101

2008-04-29T06:48:00.000-07:00

WARNING! Technical Mumbo Jumbo Ahead! But you might learn something too. Enter at your own risk.

Son #2 had a meltdown a few weeks back & "chinned" the teachers desk at school, breaking off parts of his two front teeth. He has a nice upside V for a hole there now. I call him Bunnicula now. But with this injury & discomfort has come many, many meltdowns with son#2 lately. He's unpredictable and it's not pretty. There have been many, many time outs in his room. So with meltdowns come people who stare. And many people who don't understand. The world is filled with plenty of people who don't want to understand. But for those of you that do, and are curious what a little part of Autism FEELS like--I wrote this.

I attended a Sensory Integration seminar at the therapy place my kids go to. Some of it was stuff I knew, other parts were eye opening. I figured if they were illuminating to me, some of you in contact with anyone like my children, might benefit from my interruption so why not share some of the internal processing that goes on with kids on the Autism spectrum.

You have your five basic senses that we all learn in school. Then there are three HIDDEN senses. Kind of like your Spidey senses. However kids on the AS (Autism spectrum), don't have an easy time FEELING these things that are second nature to us. This is where we need Sensory Integration for them. And SI (sensory integration) are different therapies that help them register the sense or feeling.

Tactile discrimination is the first & the most primitive sense. Your hair on your body is able to help discriminate some things with this sense. Like when you get that tingle on the back of your neck? Another example is your ability to determine what is in your hand without looking. If you're blindfolded & someone puts a feather in your hand and a rock in the other hand. You're able to differentiate between the two & tell what they are by tactile discrimination. And you don't really remember anyone teaching you how to do that do you? That's why theses senses are considered hidden or innate.

Then there's vestibular sense which has a lot to do with your posture and balance. It's like having a protective system within you. It tells you which way is up, how your body is oriented in relation to up, how your body is moving in space and when to throw up. When you start to fall you put your hands out in front of you. We say it's instinct but really it's called vestibular sense.

The last hidden sense is called proprioception and has a lot to do with muscles and joints & the nerve endings in them that send the messages to the brain. This sense lets you know how heavy something is, how far down it is when you take a step and it is stimulated by gravity. When you get up all groggy in the morning & go to the cupboard to reach in for your coffee cup, you know how much force to use for picking up the weight of that cup. If you close your eyes and extend an arm out to the side and then to the front, there is a sensing of where the hand is located in space in relation to the body itself. Especially when the muscles of the hand are flexed. Try it. You sense/feel the arm more (eyes closed!) when your hand is in a fist. That's because you're stimulating nerves by making that fist.

The reason these senses are important is because SI (sensory integration) is the foundation of emotional regulation & learning. You want to know about Autism? Non-Verbal Autism? It's hard to get in their heads & tell you what's going on or how they feel, but this might enlighten you. We knew what it was, but now we know WHAT causes these meltdowns to happen to son#2.
Autism is a neurological problem in the brain. It's essentially roadblocks that don't allow communication & other basic fundamentals, things we don't even remember learning, to happen in a normal way. Because of this neuro/nerve problem, things are wired a tad differently inside of them. Where it's easy for us to use our hidden senses, theirs are either too heightened or to dull for them to get the messages their nerves are sensing. Therefore we have to stimulate them to FEEL & SENSE these things. These basic skills help our "neuro makeup" & underlying learning process to progress and react in a developed way.

Here is the best example of this I can use. When son#2 can't figure out how to communicate what he's wanting to one of us, or can't figure out how to tell us how he feels, he melts down. A meltdown is just the new word for tantrum. But you can imagine at 96lbs and 7 years old, there's more heft behind the kicking & screaming. Remember my post about the terrible two's? Those are manageable tantrums...when it goes to the extreme, we call it a meltdown. Scratching, flailing around, wailing and much gnashing of teeth. The severity of this is determined by several things. How badly he wants or needs "it" whatever it is at that moment. How tired he is, how hungry he is, how many times he has to take us to the place or item to get his point across, if we've said no and if he is due for his meds.
The medicine allows son#2 to reel back in the emotions and fervor and get it back together enough to function again. Sometimes he's too far gone & it takes an hour or more to get himself back together. Part of this is maturity. All kids learn this when transitioning from baby to child. Other parts are where an Autistic brain is different than our own. (thought I'd forgotten my point didn't you?) Son #2's brain, isn't processing the same information as ours when we're doing the exact same task. Because of his deficits in that area, it will interfere with the creation of ideas or connecting them together, and analytical thinking. Hence the non-verbal part.

When people say the Autism spectrum is wide ranged, they aren't kidding. No kid is exactly like another in the world, and Autistic kids get even more unique and personalized in their way of learning, communicating and finding their way in the world.
The perfect example of this uniqueness is son#1 is getting over stimulation to his sensory system. Whereas son#2 is not getting enough. Now this isn't true with EVERYTHING, but with most things, this is how they are integrating. Over & under. Yet, both are Autistic.
So son#2 feels better when he swings. This goes back to the point of vestibular sensing. It calms him because he isn't processing what he's sensing correctly. He isn't sure of what he's feeling. He's not sure of his body in the world. Sort of like an astronaut in space? So swinging stimulates the inner ear where gravity & our body are centered & gives son#2 extra stimulation to FEEL himself there. Other ways are weighted vests and blankets sort of like the x-ray apron they give you at the doctor's office. It's weighted & feels good to them. Like yoga, they feel centered & that allows them to feel calm. We like calm. You can learn better when you're calm.
Jumping is the best thing though. All those endorphins released by jumping & bouncing up against things. You feel alive & very happy. Or that's what their faces say to me.

So maybe I've given you a little peek into what it's like to be Autistic. Maybe you see now where some of the frustration comes from in those kids you see melting down. Doesn't always make it easy to deal with, but that kid at the store, may need more than that spankin you're thinking of. Would you feel that way if he was blind? Without certain senses I think there's an adjustment period where your body & your brain have to come to terms with each others abilities. This takes time and patience. And more importantly, there's a learning curve. Whether this Autistic Spectrum child is in your classroom, your church or is in your family--you are his classmate. His learning curve will effect you. Why not help him out? It'll help YOU out in the long run.

10 Years Old

2008-04-17T07:42:00.001-07:00

I struggle with my oldest son turning ten years old yesterday. I'm not sure I know how this happened--it seems all of the sudden he's getting hair on his upper lip & legs. He doesn't want to sit on my lap or let me kiss him in public. It went slow in parts but sped up near the end here. When people tell you it goes faster the older you get, BELIEVE THEM.
The funniest thing is, he's in less of a hurry than I am for him to grow up.

Son #1 has been worrying about getting older. Last night he finally answered me when I asked why he didn't want to grow up & be older.
"Because then I'll die, and I don't want to die!" Aww! I had to explain that he won't die, and even if he did it would be a long time from now. I looked back at all the times during his interest in death in recent years, when we had consoled him by saying, "Everyone dies, but you won't die till you're old(er)." Mr. Literal took that to heart it seems. All month he's been saying, "I don't want to grow up & be a big boy!" or "I dont want to be ten, I want to go backwards & be eight years old!" My response? "Honey, I've tried that since I was 29 years old--doesn't work."

He had a great birthday, enjoyed money in the mail & from the bus drivers. (we do have the best here) So last night I took him to Wal-Mart to shop. We got Shrek 3, a "Bling Bling Lightning McQueen" car, and some Lego Clone Storm Troopers. (I bet I botched that last name up...)
All mommy had to contribute was $.27--not too shabby! We got him a Millienum Falcon with "crew" that were from the Galactic Hero sets & some more Lego Clone Troopers. Even the cake was Star Wars & strawberry as he requested, but he didn't partake. Maybe one day he'll eat his own birthday cake.

Son#1 had also been asking for a Wii controller for his birthday, I very nicely explained that wasn't what he was getting. Interestingly enough, I think he would have been happy with just the controller. Hubbo informs me in a household where I'm outranked 4 to 1 in sex, a game system is imminent or a birthright, I'm not sure which. He's just trying to decide between an XBox360 or a Wii. But I have my OWN system I plan to implement when that time comes though. I feel son#1 should earn his time to play video games. So I'm stealing an idea from a friend of placing time values on poker chips in 15 minute allotments. Then he can do chores like bringing me trash from the bathroom, help when we ask to bring us something, etc. And if the surly boy attitude insues that seems to have overtaken him the past year, he coughs up a chip/playing time. This ought to work. I'm very optimistic actually. Now, the big question is, will it work on Hubbo?

Signed-"Tired Of It" in Tulsa

2008-04-10T07:31:00.000-07:00

I wrote this a couple of months back & let it sit in my drafts folder while I contemplated my wording. I emailed it off this morning after a couple of revisions. Hopefully I'm not the only one tired of seeing/hearing about dead kids in every news headline.

I start by saying I've been a huge fan of "XYZ News Channel" and your web site since 9/11. My husband and I became news hounds as much of America did then. We watched your whole evening line-up of shows and felt that we got to know the very personable hosts you have for each news piece or segment. Over the years, we've grown attached to and worried for A. Kelly, B. Leventhal and C. Harrigan out in the field. Each show has it's own flavor & we've appreciated what each host brings to the table. We consider "XYZ News" hard hitting and a high caliber of honest journalists.

I've also appreciated how you don't assume your viewers are ignorant and don't talk down to us. No matter how many people doubt it, we do believe you let us, the people at home, decide for ourselves once you present the facts. We've also been fans of the web site. I've had it as my homepage on my computer for years now. I check it several times a day & update my husband at work where there's "breaking news". I didn't really care for the last change of the appearance on the web page, but I remained a fan & kept with it even though I felt it was harder to navigate & follow.

However, I tell you this to let you know now I am finding a huge disappointment in your web site lately. The past 8 months or so I've noticed the main headlines at the top that greet me every morning are not pleasing. I realize the real world is full of displeasing people and things. It's not all unicorns & rainbows out there. But to have the story or headlines I see every morning to be about children dying in our country at the hands of their parents has me sickened and fed up.

Most recently when I logged on, I've seen someone has murdered their three month old baby & then thrown him and his carseat from their car on the highway. And there is this beautiful baby's picture large as life staring at me next to the headline. Or very recently the toddler beaten to death with the video game controller. While I am saddened by the deaths of celebrities, athletes and people who've touched our country's history that are reported, I can accept their deaths much easier. Maybe some of us being mothers we are affected more deeply by those horrific things. But I honestly believe, no one wants to hear any more about these cases so prominently and so very often in our daily news. My friends and I have talked about it, my husband has agreed. It's not necessary.

I really believe now after seeing so many, that the attention these heinous crimes receive, breeds more. I'm asking you to please not tell me at the top of your web page, so boldly displayed, about the mother who microwaved her baby. Don't show me pictures of what a sweet baby he was. I can't take any more. I no longer need to be told about the sex crimes and hate, touching the children of the world EVERY morning with my coffee or while I eat my dinner. Your headlines alone chill me sometimes. They can effect ones mood for the next hour or sicken you from taking that next bite of food. Just reading the words stays with me like pictures from an accident you wish you'd never seen.

I'm asking you to at least highlight these terrible stories in a certain color and relocate them down the page so when my eyes skim your headlines, I can choose not to read the words. With television, you can change the channel or mute it. With Internet though, it's different. Please do something where I don't have to know the horrific details to each & every crime to a child in this country. Otherwise, I'm afraid I'll be forced to find a new homepage for my browser.

~A Sincere Fan, But Tired Of It
Tulsa, Oklahoma

The Yellow Brick Road

2008-03-31T11:39:00.000-07:00

I recently got an email for my 15th year, high school reunion that will be held in my hometown this summer. I've never gone to one of my high school reunions. I've really tried to think back to why I haven't cared to go or participate and I think going away to college and hardly coming home, had a lot to do with it. The distance probably grew greater each year. Then my parents moved to Oklahoma and after college, Hubbo and I followed. We felt it only fair since I had their only grandchild. So here I am finding myself in Oklahoma, not having been back to Joplin, Missouri since 1999. I went back then, for one of my best friend's nursing school graduations. Getting the invitation to the class reunion I noticed the contact people were some old friends. It was nice to get in touch & catch up with everyone via email & phone calls but I did decide that wasn't going to be enough. I was really beginning to wonder how different it was or wasn't and what it looked like now. Saturday I took off for the day, to see old friends and old familiar places.

My first throw back memory was passing the town of Vinita on the highway. They have an interesting rest stop there I used to make my parents stop at each time we went through. Not many kids can say they've been to the McDonalds in the sky. With all glass on both sides, you can eat while watching the cars go by on the highway below. What kid wouldn't think that was a cool thing?

The trip didn't take as long as I remembered as a kid either. Even with construction I was making pretty good time. I did notice a lot of Illinois license plates out on the highway though. Now, I'm gonna assume you don't know where Joplin is, so I'll tell you-it's in the southwest corner. They call it the "Four State Area" down there because its where Kansas, Missouri, Oklahoma & Arkansas all meet & touch.

I was enjoying the view even though it was overcast until I realized I might possibly be going a little too leisurely. I saw two white-haired women with a folded up walker in the back window of their car, pass me and two semi trucks. And you know how you usually catch up with a car like that eventually & feel justified that you were not in fact going slow, they were just in some big hurry to get to the same stop light you're going to? Yeah, didn't happen. They smoked me & I never saw them again.

Once in Joplin, I met up with old friends. We laughed till we cried, we talked about anyone & everyone that we could remember and we ate at wonderful places with great food and atmosphere. It was fabulous to see "home" again and surprising to see what had changed. All the places I figured were gone & closed, were still there. And that was more shocking than the expected progress of the main strip of restaurants, the mall and stores. I never noticed we have a church on almost every corner, and I'm pretty sure there were not that many tattoo parlors when I was growing up. Joplin seemed more populated or at the least more vehicles & lanes of traffic to get stuck in.

I got to drop by my friends parents house & say hi. Although her mother tried to coerce us into our usual duet at the piano, I assured her my large lunch wasn't having any. It was striking to see how their house had changed, but the bathroom we got ready in to go many places, still held that note of hairspray in the air which was touching.

I was really disappointed that so much on Main street was let go, but that at least no one had bulldozed it yet. Spaghetti Red's was still there & open for business as well as the Pearl Brother's Tru-Value hardware store downtown. For some reason, those things made me happy. A little touch of Mayberry I guess. My house I grew up in got the award for most changed. A white church bus in the backyard gave it a quality my parents never could apparently. And I could see the tree I planted as a tiny switch (those of you unfamiliar with this term need to really be thankful) in the backyard, is now much taller than the house.

I think what I learned the most from my trip was the past is only the same in your mind. Even if I'd stayed in town to go to college, or come back to Joplin to live, it wouldn't have stayed the same town I grew up in or remembered. The town changes, the landscape changes and the people change. Life isn't what we think it'll be, it just goes on around us. I know this sounds obvious but it took awhile to sink in I think.

I don't know why I avoided going back for so long. Maybe I've learned to dread change. With my life dealing with the kids issues, we deal in a lot of gray areas around here. You can classify Autism many ways, but never does it fit into black or white. So we like to map out as much black & white for them & us as we can. It makes it easier on the kids & those of us who live in their chaotic world. I think going back to Joplin would have been a little harder to categorize. It's all gray for me now. Or maybe it's the same reason I don't go by my grandma's house every time I'm in town visiting my mom. In my mind, it looks the same as the last day I was in it. And I like it that way. I don't need that bubble being burst by visual of a dirty van parked outside and pink walls. Too much. That complicates the memory. And complicated memories aren't as comforting are they? In life we get all kinds of bubbles burst, so maybe trying to control some of that is normal. Maybe not, but it's the way I roll.

Confusingly for me, I have all the memories of that person that grew up in Joplin. The life where I was a kid, carefree & someone else made all the decisions. The responsibilities that come with being an adult can age you beyond the years you feel you are in actual years. My dilemma was how to merge my past person with my present self. Now I'm not sure I can. Maybe I'll just unlock that part of me when I'm in town.

My new reality of my hometown is, it's the same but it's different. Just like me.